Reconstruction
by Slutch32
Summary: Bella's new to Forks, add one Edward, some hormones, chemistry, sex, love, misery, gossip and family dysfunction, stretch it out for ten years – then look back on it four years later – A Reconstruction of their ten year history. AH
1. Chapter 1

******Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, just the characters.**

**Special thanks to TwirlGrrl, who has agreed to go on this journey with me and came up with the name. She whipped through the first three chapters in a day, preparing them for your beautiful eyes. After 80+ pages of outlines and rough ideas, it was still being called 'unknown story'. Reconstruction is perfect, as we will thoroughly reconstruct the 10 year saga of Edward and Bella's love affair. TwirlGrrl, your insight has been invaluable and thanks for all your great ideas and feedback. **

******Reconstruction** is an architectural term meaning returning a damaged building to a known earlier state by the introduction of new materials.

**Chapter One - Four Years Later **

**Alice POV**

**April 1, 2006**

I hit the speed dial button and listened to the phone ring. Once, twice, three times. _Answer baby, answer. I'm freaking out here. _

"Hey babe."

Aaaahhhh, two words and my nerves already felt better. My southern gentleman. I'd been waiting for him for about 14 years, but we'd only been together a few months. It still surprised me how his presence, or just his voice would affect me. Like now, those two words just made me better. He brought a certain calm to me that I'd always been missing. I'd always been a little bit different. My crazy energy level was minor, comparatively. The teachers didn't know how to deal with it, but my parents decided to embrace it. They enrolled me in a Montessori school when we moved to Chicago. I was allowed to work at my own pace, which turned out to be very very fast.

"Thank God. Jazzy, tell me again why we are doing this."

"Because you thought it was a good idea."

"And you think this is the right thing to do."

"Nope, not sure at all."

I growled at him. "Jasper, you are not helping me here. I'm freaking out."

"Alice, this was totally your idea. Do you want to cancel?"

_Yes. No. I don't fucking know! _

"You really think he's changed Jasper?"

"Alice, he's my cousin. I've known him my whole life; he's changed. But he's not happy. And I don't know if he'll ever be happy until he sees this through."

"Do you think he's just trying to get her back? Are you're sure he won't hurt her?"

"Alice, we've been through this. I don't know what he really wants. I'm not a mind reader. Besides I'm not sure he even knows what he really wants. But I think he carries a lot of guilt. And he genuinely wants her to be happy."

"Jasper, she'll never forgive me if this ends badly."

"Alice, it's just dinner, how badly could it go?"

"Badly would be him making a meal of her heart - again. He's chewed it up and spit it out too many times already. Now she's had peace and quiet for the last four years. She's getting on with her life; she's been dating, albeit not well, but she's trying. She's got a career, and a good reputation."

"Look Alice, we can cancel this right now. You don't have to put yourself in the line of fire if you aren't comfortable with it. But you said yourself she's been dating, but she compares every guy she goes out with to him. And her career is the whole reason he talked you into this. But, if you aren't comfortable, just say the word and I'll cancel. She meets with Tia on Friday; let Tia and Benjamin tell her. Then just wait and see how it goes."

I thought about it for a minute and came to the same conclusion I always came to, "No, I know how it will go. She is so excited about this project, but her knee-jerk reaction will be to walk away as soon as she hears his name. She walked away from her entire career four years ago to get away from him. She won't think twice about doing it again."

"Alice, I honestly believe that's why he wants to do it this way. He doesn't want to hurt her personally or professionally. He really hopes that if she's going to freak out she can do that with you, and not in front of a client. But if Bella decided to try and forgive him, I think it would be good for both of them."

_Fuck if that was going to happen – tonight anyway. _

"Well, I hope he's not holding his breath for forgiveness." I sighed. "Alright, let's give it a shot. She's gonna be pissed at me, but I'm pretty sure she'll forgive me eventually." I saw Rose walking up from the parking lot. She waved at me and waited. "Okay, baby, I'm here and there's Rose."

"Okay, I'll let you go, but Alice?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"No matter what happens Bella will forgive you. Even if she's super pissed tonight, your heart is in the right place and she'll see that."

"Thank you baby. We'll see you guys in about 45 minutes, right?"

"Or a bit longer – Emmett just sent me a text that he's running late at the office."

"Okay, but not sooner. I need to get a couple of drinks in Bella first." The phone beeps. I glanced at the caller ID "Oh, hey, Bella is calling. See you soon."

"Love you – bye baby." I heard Jasper hang up. I flashed Rose a single finger telling her to wait a second and clicked over to answer Bella.

"Hey Bells, you on your way?"

"Alice you are not going to fucking BELIEVE what happened today!! Holy shit! What the hell am I going to fucking DO?"

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Rosalie and I may swear like sailors but Bella rarely does. If she is cursing like that already, she has had a very bad day and that is not the way to start this out. "I don't know, you haven't told me what happened yet, but seriously, are you on your way?"

"Yeah – I'm on my way. I just left the house. I'll tell you about it when I get there. I need a drink before I can even start. But seriously Alice, why did you lay out such a super sexy-mama dress? You promised this was not a date. If this is a date you might as well cancel it now because I am so not in the mood tonight. You have no idea."

_Oh we should totally cancel this. _

"Bella, I can cancel if you want. I mean it's not a date – just Jasper's two cousins and they are – fun."

"No don't cancel; it would be rude this late. I'll be okay. Besides I really need the distraction. When will they get there? If I can have a drink or two first I'll be in a better mood."

"They won't be here for at least forty-five minutes."

"Okay, I'm still 15 minutes out, so order me something and I'll see you soon. And get ready, because I've got some shit to tell you."

"Okay, but Rosalie's been waiting for me and she's about to crack the concrete the way her toe's tapping." Rose was standing on the sidewalk with her arms crossed tapping her stiletto impatiently.

"Okay – I'll let you go…. Uh-oh, hang on, I think there's a problem up ahead. I see nothing but break lights. Yup, we just came to a stand-still. I might be a bit. Order me an apple martini okay?"

_Shit shit shit. _

I sighed. This is a bad time for a traffic jam. "Ok. It'll be waiting for you. We'll see you whenver you get here."

I snapped the phone shut and climbed out of the car. "Sorry Rose – that was Bella. She just got stuck in a traffic jam. I think there's trouble brewing and she has no fucking clue what's in store for the evening. This might be bad – really bad. But she won't cancel now because 'that would be rude.'"

Rosalie smirked. "Far be it from Bella to be rude. Well, let's get a table and wait for the fireworks."

As we walked into the restaurant I sent a text to Jasper.

**Bella stuck in traffic. Stall. **

We put our name on the list for six in non-smoking and grabbed a table in the bar to wait. We ordered drinks. A few minutes later Jasper sent me a text back.

**Problem. Can't stall. E is going to meet us there now. He could be there soon.**

_FUCK!_

_______________________________________________________

**BPOV**

I had been looking forward to tonight. This morning that is. We were meeting with Alice and her boyfriend Jasper, Rosalie and two of Jasper's cousins/best friends/ business partners. I don't know if it was a triple date, or just a friendly get-together. I didn't really care. It had been so damned long since I'd been out on a decent date, non-date, or just plain old gotten laid, I was almost desperate.

For the last four years I'd been putting an insane amount of effort into trying to get over _him. _For the first two years I allowed myself to dwell in the memory of him, before I decided that it wasn't healthy anymore. So I stopped talking about him and started dating.

In the last two years I'd dated more men than I cared to count. But no one clicked for me. I thought I wasn't making enough effort to connect, so I'd taken it further; and by further, I mean sex. The sex had presented a nice distraction, but also more frustrating. As hard as I tried, I wasn't able to bring myself to climax without letting my mind wander to _him. _This wasn't a problem if it was a solo effort, but I couldn't let myself do that when I was actually with someone else. That was just so _wrong. _

So I'd fallen into a pattern; the pattern was simple. First we'd meet for coffee or drinks so I could determine if he was attractive and able to string together a few intelligible sentences. Next we'd do to dinner or dancing. If he was able to hold my attention through the second date, which many didn't, then we'd set up a third date. The third date was when I would usually put him through a more thorough test drive and we'd end up back at his place.

Unfortunately, even the best sex with the most skilled and determined men would inevitably end with me faking my orgasm so that he would finally give up and I could go home. Once I was home I could freely conjure up my best memories of _he-who-shall-remain-nameless,_ bring myself to orgasm, and drift off to sleep. A few exceptionally attractive men had seemed promising enough that they were given a few more chances to try and make it happen, but no one was given more than a small handful of romps in the sack before I grew tired of faking my orgasms and would move on.

I wasn't indiscriminant, but I was searching, searching for anyone who could help lessen the ache that I felt for _him_. And so far, I hadn't found anyone who came close. This brought me back to tonight, where I was fighting through traffic in my short little black cocktail dress while wondering if anything more promising would be waiting for me at the restaurant.

Alice almost seemed nervous about this evening and had called me three times today. Once to make sure I was still coming, again to move the time up so that we could chat for a bit and have cocktails before the guys arrived, and finally to make sure I was going to have time to go home and change.

Like I said, I had been looking forward to it. That was _until_ my last meeting before going home to change.

_An hour earlier:_

I was wrapping up a meeting with with Tia Montgomery and her fiancée Benjamin Massri. Tia is a repeat client and she had just gotten engaged to Ben. They wanted to make some changes to a plan that Tia and an old architect boyfriend had drawn up a few years ago. They'd broken up before it was ever finished, but Tia still liked the design. Fortunately, Ben liked it too and had no qualms about the history of the design. They wanted my help to tweak the design to reflect more of their tastes as a couple.

"Well, I don't think it will be difficult to incorporate more natural elements. The traditional styling and gable roof lines lend themselves well to some log-home accents. If we use a large exposed log-beam here, here, here, and through here,"

I made some notes on the plans, "and you could do an open log staircase here. The rest could just be done with surface treatments and decorative elements. Let's change the exterior to cedar or recycled fiber-cement if you prefer less maintenance. It will still be natural looking and eco friendly."

I paused for a few minutes to make some notes of my own. Benjamin had really good taste. The house was spectacular to begin with. Tia had a set of plans delivered last week so that I could review them first. I was positively drooling over this one. I'd been worried what kind of changes Ben wanted to make. But, I was pleased. He was going the same direction I would have gone. If fact, it would be the first time. I'd be able to design using log-home styling WITH a green-built home..

Green building was all the rage right now with. The lines of the home were amazing. I saw magazine-cover-quality craftsmanship here. And being involved from this point was awesome. Plus, Tia was always great at gushing over my work and giving tons of credit. She had great taste but let me take the lead creatively.

I continued, "I do think we should bring in an architect to make structural adjustments. Log beams are very heavy and we'll want to make sure it is properly supported. I can make a few recommendations for an architect, unless you want to use the same person that did the drawings originally." This is my tactful way of saying_ "Benjamin do you still want Tia's ex drawing up the plans for your house?" _

Ben knew where I was going and smiled and shook his head. "Oh, no, if it's all the same to you, we'd like to use our guy. We are actually friends. He introduced me and Tia."

_Whew. _Well that's good, not everyone can manage that kind of friendliness. And I really didn't want to bring in someone new. They always end up taking too many creative liberties to redirect the project more to their liking."Okay, good. If you can give me contact information, I'll call his office and set up a time. When will you be back in town and available?"

Tia started rifling through her purse. "Here I've got his card here somewhere. We leave this evening and will be back in town next week Tuesday. If it's possible I'd like to get going soon. We set the date for the wedding... July 15 of next year. We know it's tight, but if there is any way we can come home from the honeymoon and move in, we would be ecstatic. Where is that card? Ben, do you have one with you?"

_A year! They want to do designs and build this bad boy in a year! Yikes! _

"A year is pretty fast. Have you selected a builder yet? If we can get a builder on board asap, we might have a chance."

Ben nods, "Oh yeah, same guys. They do large-scale residential and commercial contracting too. They've already agreed to take this on. They know our timeline. I talked with Emmett today about another project. He said things are slowing down enough that if we can get started on design changes quickly, they should be able to finish it. But again, they understand that you might have particular ideas about finishing materials and wanted to get your thoughts on those things before they commit to a timeline."

_Okay, now I'm ready to pass out. The builder is letting the interior designer dictate timeline based on finish material lead-times. That rarely if ever happens without a serious pissing match, something I'd gotten quite good at. Who were these guys? Wait did he just say Emmett? Oh no. Tell me it's not…_

"Here we go. This is his card. Edward's the architect and Emmett is head of construction. They have both said that they would enjoy working with you and are expecting your call."

And that's when I felt it; the heat that flashed through my body every time I thought of him. It flashed across my skin leaving me slightly flushed and then inevitably settled into my core where it would start another slow ache that would throb in me until I could resolve it in the privacy of my own bedroom. Depending on the day, I might resolve it by crying myself to sleep, other days with my own hand between my legs.

_My worst fucking nightmare; it was _him_...Edward Fucking Masen, or Cullen now. I forgot he changed his name, interesting. Whatever. I didn't care. My perfect project just went to shit in a millisecond._

**_A/N: For those of you who have been waiting for updates on Hope to Overcome and Man Behind the Mask, my apologies. I haven't abandoned them, but this story has consumed me from inception to completion. I've got the entire thing outlined and should be able to post updates rather quickly with the wonderful help of my beta, TwirlGrrl. She's been whipping through it for me._**

**_This has been a labor of love - so please, please, review. I am desperate to hear your thoughts on this baby that I have poured hours and hours into. (Not to mention neglected my husband and kids, and grown totally sleep deprived.)_**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Again, special thanks to twirlgrrl for being such an awesome beta!!!**

**Disclaimer - don't own twilight, just love the characters.**

**Chapter 2 **

**BPOV**

"_Here we go. This is his card. Edward's the architect and Emmett is head of construction. They have both said that they would enjoy working with you and are expecting your call."_

_And that's when I felt it; the heat that flashed through my body every time I thought of him. It flashed across my skin leaving me slightly flushed and then inevitably settled into my core where it would start another slow ache that would throb in me until I could resolve it in the privacy of my own bedroom. Depending on the day, I might resolve it by crying myself to sleep, other days with my own hand between my legs._

_My worst fucking nightmare; it was _him_...Edward Fucking Masen, or Cullen now. I forgot he changed his name, interesting. Whatever. I didn't care. My perfect project just went to shit in a millisecond._

_Fuck Fuck Fuck. Why now? Why _this _project. I'd managed to avoid him for four solid years now. _

"Cullen, McCarty and Whitlock? Oh. That might be a bit of a problem."

Tia's eyes got really big. "Why? Have you worked with them before? Didn't it go well?"

I chewed on the inside of my cheek for a minute. This was so unprofessional. I couldn't turn down this whole thing just to continue to have peace and quiet in my personal life, could I? But let's face it. Just his name on that card had made me break out in a cold sweat and the hair stand up on the back of my neck.

Benjamin sensed my hesitation and put his hand over Tia's. "Bella, when I mentioned your name to Emmett I sensed a problem. He said that they would be more than happy to work with you if you wanted to work with them. Tia here has a solid relationship with you, so I'm hoping you will continue to work with us on this, but it's up to you. Whatever the…history… is here, I have a very solid business relationship with Cullen, McCarty and Whitlock and I'm not willing to jeopardize it by going with another company for either the Architectural changes or the construction. I hope you understand."

When Benjamin mentioned our history I heard Tia gasp quietly. My eyes flicked to her and she had her eyes closed and was shaking her head slowly. "Oh my God. I'm sorry Bella, I never connected the dots. I remember Edward telling me about you. I just never realized it was _you_. Or that you were _his Bella."_

I shook my head quickly and firmly. "No Tia, I haven't been his Bella for a long time now. Look, I need to think about this. Can I take the weekend to mull it over and get back to you on Monday?"

Tia nodded quickly. I could tell she felt badly about the position they had inadvertently put me in. "Of course, but I hope you decide to move forward. I can't imagine doing this without your help."

_______________________________________________________

_Present time:_

I finally fought my way through the traffic jam and made it to the restaurant about fifteen minutes before the guys were due here. Alice greeted me with a wave, she was almost bouncing on her stool. "You really do have a sour face. Hurry up and spill. We don't have much time. And here, it's vodka." She slid a martini and a small shot my direction.

"Thanks. I'm going to need this." I tossed back the vodka shot and exhaled slowly as it burned its way down and then sucked the lemon for a second with my eyes closed. My damn hands were _still_ shaking. I sipped the apple martini and took another long deep breath to try and calm myself.

Alice and Rosalie shot each other a surprised look – I'm not a big drinker – especially on a date slash get-to-know-you setup or whatever this was.

Alice look worried and nervous, Alice never looked worried or nervous. "The guys said that they would be a few minutes late, but that was a while ago. Are you going to be okay?"

"No. I don't know. Fuck," I took a deep breath and shook my head, "my whole fucking world just turned upside down today."

Rosalie rolled her eyes, "Geez Bella, dramatic much?" It was rare that anything ruffled Rosalie's feathers. But Rosalie was Rosalie, she was tough as nails. And I had to admit, getting to know her had done me some good.

I chose to ignore Rosalie. "So you remember I told you last week about the house Tia is building with her fiancée?" Alice and Rosalie had both met Tia, we were sort of distant friends. I had told them how excited I was about this one.

"Yeah," Alice said slowly nodding, then swallowed and glanced over my shoulder. She was really nervous.

"Well, we met today with her fiancée Benjamin. He's really great – a landscape architect. The changes he wants to make are awesome. And everything is great; she's still friendly with the architect, so he can make the changes. So I told them I would set up a meeting and they gave me his card." I paused for dramatic effect flipping the card up between my two fingers.

Alice squinted at me and asked, "Wait you met today? I thought you guys were meeting on Friday?"

I shook my head, "Tia and Benjamin have to go out of town so we moved it up to today, but that's so not the point here. Guess who her still-friends-with-architect-fucking-ex-boyfriend happens to be."

Alice actually went a little bit pale – she knew there was only one Architect that I had problems working with. "Oh no."

"That's right Edward Fucking Masen!"

I waited for their reactions, but both of them just looked at me with a blank look, then Alice's eyes flashed over my shoulder. That's when I heard him.

The voice came from directly behind me and over my right shoulder. He chuckled once and said, "It's Cullen now actually. As in Cullen, McCarty and Whitlock. It says it right there on the card." It was the same voice I remembered. And just like the last time I had seen or spoken to him, my reactions were the same. My heart stopped, my breathing hitched, the hair on the back of my neck stood on end, and my heartbeat was thundering in my ears drowning out all the other voices and music in the room, but his.

I froze. I slowly raised my eyes to look at Alice. She looked like she was ready to fucking bolt. She looked sort of scared shitless and apologetic at the same time. She swallowed once. "April Fools?"

I glared at her for a few seconds, or minutes, I'm not really sure. All I know is that my heart was banging so loudly, I was struggling to remember how to breathe, and I hadn't even looked at him yet. "Excuse me?" I whispered at her.

Alice's eyes sort of twitched back and forth between me and Edward, who was still standing behind my right shoulder. She cleared her throat and then her eyes flicked back to me, watching for my reaction. "Hi Edward, grab a seat why don't you. The guys are running a few minutes behind; I actually thought you were coming with them. We're still waiting for our table. See, Bella, I've been meaning to mention it, but never really got around to it. That's why I wanted us all to get together. Edward here and Jasper are cousins and business partners."

He never touched me as he slid behind me to the stool next me, but I felt him. I felt the buzz that had always been there between us. Like the feeling you get when you wave your hand over the glass of an old TV that has been on for a long time. He didn't really have any other options. It was, after all, the only open seat at the table. He was actually still chuckling as he slid by me. I was still frozen in place with my eyes locked on Alice. I was vaguely aware that Rosalie was sitting there with her jaw hanging open, nearly drooling over Edward. I glared at her and she closed her mouth. It was a good thing – she was damn near salivating over him. And she was my damned friend, but I was really thinking about putting all of my frustration behind a punch square to her mouth.

Rosalie collected herself and stuck out her hand to him, "Hi, Rosalie Hale, Bella here is apparently going to need a minute before she will be able to speak again. So I should probably just introduce myself."

He reached over and shook her hand. "Hi Rosalie, I'm Edward Cullen. Alice, you look lovely as always. How are you this evening?"

Alice gulped again, still looking at me, still looking scared shitless. Her eyes twitched between me and Edward. "Well, right now, Edward, I'm kicking myself for letting you talk me into this. Bella here looks like she's about to jump over this table and snap me in two. Did I tell you that she's been taking kickboxing classes for the last three years? I should have mentioned it probably." I still hadn't looked at him. I was still in shock that my best friend in the whole fucking world had set me up like this.

Edward took a deep breath and sighed. "Bella? Don't be mad at Alice. I really twisted her arm into doing this. I wanted to meet with you in person and I really didn't think that you would ever come if you knew that I'd be here."

I took a deep breath, shot one last death glare at Alice, and then turned to look at Edward. _Fuuucckkk_. He hadn't changed one bit. Aside from the ultra-sexy five o'clock shadow and the tiny creases outside of his eyes, which made him even more appealing, he was still drop-dead, gorgeous. Dark green was always my favorite on him - it brought out his eyes - and tonight he was wearing a dark green button down shirt with the collar open, a tan blazer, and dark jeans. Add that to the yummy sex eyes and previously-known-as-the-panty-dropping-crooked-smile he was giving me and I could feel my resistance crumbling.

"Why exactly, Edward, after four lovely years of peace and quiet did you feel the need to coerce my formerly-best-friends-now-traitorous-bitch into tricking me into coming here tonight to see you?" I put as much venom into my voice as I could muster. And for just a moment I thought I saw a flicker in Edward's eye that told me he was actually nervous.

"Well, I understand that we have a business relationship in common. Last week, Emmett was speaking with Benjamin Massri, whom I suppose you have now met. Anyway, he told Emmett about the home he is working with you on. I didn't know if Tia had discussed my involvement in the project with you yet, but I hoped to talk to you before they did. After the last time we worked together I assumed you might be a bit reluctant to work with me again. So I had hoped that we could meet first and work out a mutually agreeable working relationship that you could live with."

Edward paused and waited for me to say something, but I still had no idea what to say, so I just blinked and nodded once, as if in slow motion. Edward glanced at Alice quickly, getting no help, he continued. "Look, I know that the last time we saw each other it ended on a very bad note." I snorted my agreement. "I tried to talk to you afterwards, and you wouldn't take my calls. So then I made the mistake of trying to use business relationships to force you to work with me again, hoping we could talk that way. But then you quit Murphy Designs, presumably because they put pressure on you to work with me. So, I was really worried that this situation would cause you to do something rash like that again. Add to that the relationship between Alice and Jasper. I thought it was time that we talked. And by talk, I mean just that. Talk."

"And you couldn't just pick up the phone?"

He smiled, a little sadly, "I really didn't have any hope that you would take my call after all the shitty things I did to you."

"Okay, reasonable assumption. But, really, you had to drag all of my friends into this? This is business. If we have to do business together, then that's one thing, but you've made this personal."

Alice thought this would be a great time to finally speak up. "Actually Bella, when you consider the fact that he and Jasper are cousins, it kind of already _is_ personal."

I took another deep breath. "Okay, so what is this exactly?" I waved my hand around the table and bar. "Because it damn sure isn't a date."

Edward shook his head. "No. More like neutral territory." And then he just stared at me. Those green eyes locked onto mine and just held them there.

I couldn't move. I couldn't look away. I couldn't breathe. Then I just started to shake really badly. Because after four fucking years and all the shit I'd gone through, his eyes still just bored their way right straight into my soul. Just like they did the first time I saw him, the last time I saw him, and every time he looked at me in between. Finally Edward released me when we heard Emmett's voice coming from the front of the bar. Edward turned his head and looked behind us to where Emmett and Jasper had just come in and were making there way over to us.

I took this opportunity to grab my purse, slide off my stool, and bolt to the ladies room in the back of the restaurant, not even bothering to say hello to Emmett or Jasper who were coming from the other direction. I really did like both of them. Jasper I'd just recently met, but Emmett was like a big brother to me and I hadn't seen him but twice in the last four years. But fuck, they had all been in on it! And I was so fucking pissed off I was seeing red and shaking so badly I was about to vibrate right off my stool. So I needed a minute to collect myself. And maybe if I was lucky there was a window in the bathroom that I could climb out and just escape this big fucking mess.

**Now....go review, review, review.... because my heart and soul has been dumped open before you and I'm just hoping you love me. (Cue sad puppy dog eyes-- ;) **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Chapters One, Two and Three, were already finished and my beta has been cruising through them really quickly. Twrlgrrl – best beta ever! And while the entire story is outlined, some of it is pretty rough at this point, the next being one of them. So enjoy this chapter, and then hang on with me while I work my way through the rest of it. Like I said, it's all outlined, so hopefully not much more than a few days will be needed.**

**And again, don't own Twilight, just love the characters.**

**Chapter 3 **

**BPOV**

So I ran to the bathroom and locked myself in a stall. I thought for a second I was going to puke. But I'd skipped lunch in favor of a yogurt and some grapes, so I didn't have anything in my stomach at this point. I just dry heaved until I thought my eyeballs were going to pop out of my head.

I stood there shaking violently and trying desperately to control my breathing. I allowed myself a couple of minutes to feel the overwhelming emotions that were ripping through me.

Then I heard the door swing open and the noises from the restaurant outside before the door closed again.

"Bella?" It was Rosalie. Shit. She definitely wasn't going to let me hide out in here.

"Yeah?"

"Come out of there."

I swung the door open but didn't walk out of the stall. "What Rosalie?"

"Are you going to stay in here all night?"

I shrugged. "I might. I was actually hoping there was a window I could climb out of."

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She was holding my apple martini and set it on the counter. "Come here." She stuck her hand out to me. That surprised me. It wasn't her normal kick-ass Rosalie tone. I just looked at her.

She reached in and grabbed my hand and yanked me forward. "Come on. You're a mess." She leaned me against the counter and started wetting a paper towel. She brushed my hair back and wiped off my forehead. I was still fortunate enough to not need much makeup, and she was careful to avoid smearing my mascara. She opened my purse and pulled out my lipstick and powder and started dabbing at my face. I just let her.

"You know I've been there before too."

I was confused. "Been where?"

"Where you are. Having to face the one person who steam rolled over my heart."

"Who, Royce?"

She just nodded. "I talk big, but honestly what he did to me nearly killed me. I loved him. Or at least I thought I did – maybe I really did. I can't remember. I thought I was going to marry him and make babies and have a white picket fence and shit. And then he…did what he did…and left me there."

Rose paused and swallowed hard. I think I actually heard the lump in her throat.

"I tried to press charges, but it was my word against his. And my parents didn't want to make a big spectacle of the whole thing, his parents being my Dad's boss and all that shit. So I just dropped it."

"And then, five years ago, right after I'd gotten my license, I was holding an open house all by myself. It was a cute little yellow colonial with an actual white picket fence. I loved that house. And the day was going well enough when guess who walked in the front door?" She looked at me and paused, not really waiting for an answer. "Do you know what I did?"

"Kicked him in the balls?"

She shook her head. "I wish. I froze. He's just standing there, smirking at me and says 'well, well Rosalie Hale.' Like the last time we'd seen each other was one of his fondest memories. And he started to introduce me to his wife, who was standing there holding their little baby. And what do you think I do, but turn tail, run to the bathroom, and lock myself in." Rose huffed for a minute while she remembered it.

"Oh, Rose." I couldn't imagine how she felt. No, wait, yeah, actually I could.

"I waited until I heard them leave. Then I came out of the bathroom, shut off the lights, locked up the house, went home, and cried myself to sleep." She frowned at the mirror and started touching up her lipstick. Then she turned to me. "You know what? After everything he did to me, that is the day I wish I could take back the most. When he raped me, I at least tried to fight him. I can own that. He did what he did and he has to live with it. Those wounds have healed."

"But the fact that when I had the chance to face him – really face him – I turned and ran;" she shook her head, staring at the sink, "that's the moment that haunts me when I go to bed at night." I saw her jaw clench and she closed her eyes for second.

Then she steeled herself and stood up straight again, looking me in the eyes. "So, Bella, are you going to own this? Or are you going to hide in the bathroom?"

"Okay. I hear you. Just give me a minute. I'll be right out."

She smiled at me. "Good. Now drink this and then stop at the bar on your way back. I'll tell them you're pissed and needed a minute to cool off, and then you're getting another drink; no one will know how long you hid out in here."

"Thanks Rose. You're a good friend."

She winked at me and slipped back out.

I stood there taking a few more deep breaths and then decided Rose was right. He did what he did and that's on him. But I'm going to own this.

So I straightened up and washed my hands. Then I headed to the bar for another apple martini. They were thankfully quick and I considered downing it and getting a third one, but I needed to be careful. Getting wasted wouldn't help anything.

I made my way back to the table. Rosalie saw me coming and flashed me a big smile, causing everyone's attention to turn. Emmett turned to me and flashed me one of his big, toothy, trademark grins. Emmett was awesome, why couldn't I fall for him instead of his moronic cousin?

"Bells how are ya?" He opened his arms up for a big hug. I loved Emmett hugs.

"Hey Emmett. I'm okay, all things considered."

He whispered in my hair, "Sorry about this. I had no idea that they'd kept you in the dark until we were on our way. It's not how I would have done it."

"I know, right?" I just shook my head and turned back to the table.

I looked at Jasper. "So you must have been their partner in crime."

He just shrugged and pointed between Alice and Edward. "Sorry. It was their idea."

I just squinted at the traitorous bitch and devil incarnate. Alice looked pale, nervous and tight-lipped. Edward looked…..like Edward; sexy, yummy and like I wanted to lick him from head to toe. Fuck.

"Here Bella, have a seat." Emmett stood and offered me back my stool next to Edward.

I shook my head no. "Thanks Emmett, I'm good."

"Are you sure? I don't mind standing, I'd hate to make a lady stand."

"No thanks Emmett, really, I'm okay." And my eyes flicked to Edward and he just looked uncomfortably down at the table.

Rose came to my rescue again and slid off her stool and moved over to mine. "Here Bella, take my seat."

"Thanks." I perched myself on her chair and turned my attention back to Emmett, effectively turning my back on Alice in the corner and Edward. "So, how's business going?"

Emmett and I made small talk amongst the chatter from the other four. Edward and I traded occasional glances. It actually seemed like he was just as nervous as I was because every time we made eye contact he would avert his gaze again. And, he was nervously playing with the swizzle stick from somebody's drink.

Our table was finally ready, which posed a new dilemma. Seating arrangements. We were seated at a large round table in the corner, but round was not ideal in my opinion. Round meant that no matter where I went, I would be able to see him. If it was square I could sit on the same side and wedge someone else between us, but not at a round table. So, I decided the best option was to stick myself between two neutrals. We just filed in Edward, Rosalie, Me, Emmett, Jasper and Alice, holding hands. And I don't know how the fuck it got so cobbled up because I just followed Rose, but she didn't follow Edward and Emmett went the other way. So I ended up sitting between Rosalie and Jasper, Alice next to him, Edward, Emmett and then back to Rosalie. This put me straight across from Edward.

Great. So as long as I looked anywhere other than straight ahead I should be fine.

Dinner was good, however much I tasted. With Edward sitting across from me looking all Edwardy and charming I just couldn't get myself to eat very much. But the alcohol flowed freely and I just allowed myself to be absorbed into the conversations going on around me. Alice and Edward chatted about Forks. Jasper and Alice made googily eyes at each other. Emmett and Rosalie seemed to be hitting it off pretty well too. And it was when I was eavesdropping on their particular conversation that a piece of it piqued my interest.

"So, yeah, Edward is my cousin, but he pretty much lived with us from about eighth grade on so he's more like my brother. Jasper is also our cousin, but he lived in Texas up until a couple of years ago when he decided to move up here."

Rosalie shook her head and thought about it for a second. Then she asked a question that I had been wondering as well. "But your last name is McCarty, and Edward's was Masen, but changed it to Cullen, which is your parent's name, but not yours? And Jasper's name is Whitlock. So what's the relation?"

Edward's half smile caught my eye. I'm sure he was wondering why I wouldn't ask him why he'd changed his name, but I wasn't about to open _that_ can of worms.

Emmett decided to explain. "Esme Cullen is my mother. Her maiden name was Whitlock, then she married my Dad, Collin McCarty. He died the year I was born in a hunting accident. Esme raised me alone until I was two and a half and she married Carlisle Cullen. Edward's mother was my Aunt, Elizabeth Whittlock, and then she married Edward Masen Senior and had little Eddie here. But then she died when Edward was 11 and he came to live with us. Jasper's dad was our Uncle Eric and they lived in Texas until Jasper decided to come try out the northern country and make all the ladies swoon with his southern accent."

I realized I still didn't know what Jasper did for their firm. It was called McCarty, Cullen and Whitlock. So I turned to Jasper and asked my question. "Jasper, if you don't mind my asking, what do you do?"

Jasper nodded "I run the commercial properties and the business end of things that they don't enjoy."

I wasn't even aware that they were into commercial real estate. Huh. "What kind of commercial properties do you have?"

"We have several real estate properties and some studios, mostly in the L.A. area. Edward inherited them from his father when he passed a couple of years ago. So they brought me in to manage them."

So his father had passed away. I finally looked right at him. "I'm sorry Edward, I hadn't heard."

He just shrugged. "It's okay, it was a while ago. The cancer took him pretty quickly."

I nodded. His father had played a key role in our final disintegration. I remembered our last exchange.

"_You may be exactly like him, and you will probably die alone just like him, but I'm nothing like your mother. I'm not going to sit around and watch. I have spent too much of my time, my life, and my heart on you. I'm done. I will not waste another tear, another whisper of my breath, another second of my time, or another beat of my heart waiting or hoping you are anything other than exactly like your father. I'm done here and now." _

_I unhooked his house key from my key ring and threw it at him as hard as I possibly could. Damn his quick reflexes; he caught it before it could do any damage. I climbed in my car, slamming the door and peeled out of there. The last thing I saw was Edward Masen standing on the edge of the parking lot, hands at his sides, watching me drive away._

I had been managing a careful façade constructed of pride, defiance, and sheer determination. I was adamant that I would not let him see me crumble again. But that memory, the alcohol, and staring across the table at him all night, had started to tip the scales.

There was a song coming in from the bar. I recognized it. What was it?

_I've never seen so many people want to be there by your side  
And when you turned to me and smiled it took my breath away  
And I have never had such a feeling such a feeling  
Of complete and utter love, as I do tonight_

It was right there, on the tip of my tongue. What the hell was this song?

Then I heard the next verse.

_The lady in red is dancing with me  
Cheek to cheek  
There's nobody here  
Its just you and me  
Its where I wanna be  
But I hardly know this beauty by my side  
Ill never forget the way you look tonight_

There it is. Lady in Red. The first song Edward sang to me at that bar, Pourhouse. I could see him up on that stage, under the spotlight, a crowd watching him, but his eyes only on me, like I was the only person in the room.

And then the memories started to wash over me one after another.

How slow and careful he was the first time we'd both made love.

The look on his face when he saw me standing in the bedroom doorway that night I caught him with Lauren.

The pleading way Edward looked at me when he asked me to help him with the designs for the Presidents House.

The fun we had sitting on his sofa in New York tossing sketches back and forth.

The passion I felt the next time we made love at that beautiful cottage.

The recognition on Angela's face when she realized she'd met Edward before.

The pain I was feeling even when they were announcing that we had won the Cornell University Architecture Competition.

The relief I felt when I saw Edward rushing through my front door to save me from James.

The tenderness he showed when we made love after James was taken away.

The look on Tanya Denali's face when she realized that I knew.

I'd been staring unseeingly at the candle in the middle of the table. All I really saw were the memories. The faces of Edward, Lauren, Angela, James, and finally Tanya Denali.

"Bella?" My eyes snapped up to meet his eyes. Edward was looking at me with an expression that I couldn't quite understand. It was a mixture of apology, pain, sadness, concern and question.

Everyone had stopped talking; they were watching me and Edward. I suddenly realized that there were tears streaming down my face and I was shaking all over. "Why can't you just leave me alone?" I couldn't get my voice to work very well, so it came out as a whisper.

Edward just shook his head slowly. "I'm sorry."

"I can't do this. Not again. Not now." I stood up and slid past Jasper. As I made the turn to the front hallway I saw Edward, Emmett, and Alice all standing to follow me. I didn't stop.

I zig zagged my way through the tables to the front. The hostess held the first door for me and I pushed my way out the second set of doors. The air felt cool on my wet cheeks; I kept walking.

From behind me, I heard the door open, and then Edward was calling after me. "Bella, wait."

I spun around. I was angry now. Furious. "Why? Why do you have to keep fucking with me?"

He just keeps shaking his head. "I'm sorry Bella, I didn't mean to – "He reached for my hand, but I jerked backwards like his touch would burn me.

"I hate you. Do you hear me? I hate you!"

"I know you do." His pain flashed through his eyes before he looked at the ground. He whispered something that sounded like "I do too."

I headed back towards my car, desperate to get away from here.

The clicking of Alice's heels could be heard on the sidewalk behind me. She grabbed my hand to stop me.

I slowly turned around again to face her. I was seething, but spoke quietly. I didn't need to yell for her to hear the anger in my voice. "Don't come near me, you traitorous bitch. How could you do this to me? _You know_. You've seen it! You've been there!"

"Bella I'm sorry. I guess I thought enough time –"

My fury started to give me strength. "Enough time!? There will never be enough time to fix what he's done to me. He spent ten years breaking me over and over again. How much time should it take to make that all better?"

"Bella I'm sorry, I just knew how excited you were about the project. Then he called and I thought maybe you could work together on just this one."

"Just work together?! I think we've proven that we can't do that. Alice you know that. You know!!! I can't just _be_ near him, can't _work_ with him, and can't be his _friend_. You know that!!!"

I took a few steps towards the parking lot before turning back to her one last time.

"Do you think walking away from a project would do this to me? I could give two shits about that project! There will always be other projects! But this," I said, pointing at my heart as a single sob escaped me. "This can't take anymore."

Emmett and Rosalie had followed us outside now too. And people were watching. I realized I was standing on the sidewalk in hysterics screaming at my best friend about the man who was standing right behind her listening to every word.

I took a breath to get control of myself, swallowing the rest of the sobs that were threatening to break through and walked up to her, lowering my voice. "Just save it Alice. You _always_ thought I overreacted. Overly sensitive Bella. Too fragile. And stop pretending that this was even about me. This was about you. You and Jasper. Life would be easier for you guys if we all just got along. Right?" I glared at Alice for a second, tears streaming down her face, then I lifted my chin a bit and turned for the last time towards the parking lot and started walking to my car.

But damnit, when I stepped off the curb I stumbled and dropped my keys.

Edward caught up to me and grabbed my wrist. I jerked my arm away. Without even thinking about it I whirled around and slapped him square across the face. I went to hit him again, but he caught my arm and took the keys out of the other hand. "Hit me all you want Bella, I deserve it, I know. But I'm still not going to let you drive away from here. You aren't driving. You don't have to see me or talk to me. But I'm not going to let you hurt yourself or someone else."

"So how the fuck am I getting home? Because I'm not getting in a car with you or that traitorous bitch." Traitorous Bitch was Alice's new name as far as I was concerned.

Emmett walked up to me and took my arm from Edward. "Come on Bella, I'll take you home. Alice, could you get the keys from Jasper? I'll take Bella home and then come back and get him."

Edward just nodded at Emmett and took a step back.

He looked at Edward and shook his head. "I told you dude, this was a bad idea. You should have just left it alone."

I turned my back on Edward but listened as he walked back into the restaurant. We stood in silence waiting for Alice to come back with the keys.

Once she delivered them I followed Emmett to a sleek black sedan. He opened the door for me and I climbed in, wobbling a little. I was glad he was driving me, because the further I walked, the more I realized they were right; I shouldn't be driving.

Emmett climbed in the driver's side and started the car. "You're going to need to tell me where to go; I don't really know where you live."

So I gave him some general directions and turned to look out the window.

"So you really didn't know that this was a setup?"

"Uh uh. I never would have gone along with it. I think that's one of the reasons that Edward decided to drive himself there; he didn't want to hear my thoughts on the idea."

"Why? What are your thoughts?" I'm not sure I really wanted to know his thoughts, but I was starting to feel pretty nauseous and needed something to keep my mind off it.

"I think that there's only so much that a person can take. And you've taken more than your share. I think Edward should have just left you alone. If you wanted to work with him on Ben and Tia's house, you would. If not, well, that would be up to you too."

I was silent for a minute, watching the lights blur by. How many drinks did I have tonight?

"Do you think you will?"

I grunted and shrugged. "Idonknow." The words were a slur. I tried to swallow, but my throat wouldn't work and my mouth was starting to water. Uh oh.

"Emmett – pull over."

"I can't Bella, I'm on the 101 –" He glanced over at me. "Uh oh – hang on, I'll get off at the next exit. Try to –"

But I couldn't wait. I tried to bend between my legs, but I hit my head on the dashboard. So I twisted and dove between the seats. I vomited violently into the backseat of the sleek sedan with black leather seats.

When the heaves had calmed I turned back around. "Sorry I'll pay to have it cleaned."

Emmett just shrugged and laughed. Only Emmett would find humor in someone puking their guts out. "It's Jasper's remember? And he was part of this whole ridiculous setup. I wouldn't pay him a dime if I were you."

I nodded. Good point. I leaned against the window and closed my eyes. The streetlights whizzing past me were going to make me sick again. I heard Emmett call Alice and ask for more directions; apparently he'd decided I wasn't a worthy source of information at this point.

"Okay…sure…no problem, I'll find it…no, I'll use Bella's keys. Okay….Which room is hers? Up the stairs, first door on the left. Got it….Oh, you might want to call her office in the morning. She probably won't be making it in.…I think she's got the flu…yeah, the Spanish flu."

I noticed that he didn't mention my puking inside the car… oh well. I'm so tired…


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thanks again to my wonderful Beta, TwirlGrrl. She's really been awesome fighting through this one with me. We get to explore some more of Bella's inner turmoil. **

**Starting with the next chapter, we will begin the journey that I fondly refer to as the saga of Bella and Edward in my world. Stephanie's world is the best, and the original, and I mean no copyright infringement, just wanted to spend some time with her characters in the playground that is my imagination.**

**Enjoy! And Review! I need your feedback!**

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**Chapter 4**

**BPOV**

**Thursday Morning**

I rolled over and blinked at the sunlight that was pouring through my open window shutters. Had I forgotten to shut them last night? Odd.

When I finally sat up on the edge of the bed I groaned because my pounding head made me so dizzy I thought I was going to be sick. I was still wearing the little black cocktail dress and it was anything but comfortable. My throat burned, and my mouth tasted awful. Oh right, I puked last night. In the back of that car… then it all came back to me. Edward… the restaurant… Alice set me up… Oh God… he looked so … _perfect_…and I was such a mess. _Oh God!_

I groaned and dropped my head into my hands. What time was it? There were two post-it-notes on my alarm clock from Alice. I pulled them off to see the time. 6:32 Why can't I sleep in with a hangover? When I'm sick I can sleep for twenty-four straight hours, but with a hangover I'm up with birds.

I looked at the two notes in my hand. The first read:

**Called your office. Said you had the flu. Out all day, maybe tomorrow too.**

Then the second one:

**I'm so so sorry! I'm not going to work either, so we can talk when you are ready.**

Shit, now she's here all day, waiting to "talk". _Fat chance of that happening._

I knocked one of my shoes off my bed with a thump, then immediately cringed because I knew Alice was going to come running as soon as she heard me moving around. She was not a patient woman. I took the other shoe off; it was actually still on my foot.

Sure enough, about sixty seconds later there was a light knock on the door. Then she opened it just enough to peek through.

"Bella? How are you feeling?"

"Like shit. Go away Alice." My voice was so raspy it came out as croak.

"I was hoping maybe we could talk."

"Go away Alice."

"Bella, I really am so sorry. It was a horrible idea and –"

I yelled and threw the shoe I'd been holding at the door. "I said go the fuck away! I don't want to talk to you!"

Alice backed out the door and whispered, "Okay, I'm sorry. I'll leave you alone." Then closed it.

The yelling had brought my headache to new heights. I groaned and let myself fall over back onto my bed. I was not going to talk to the Traitorous Bitch today, remembering my new name for her. But I knew if I left my room, she would be lurking around every corner until I broke down and gave in. So I laid there and considered my options for solitary confinement.

I had my own bathroom; so that was good. Someone had left a bottle of water and some Motrin on my nightstand, probably the Traitorous Bitch, but for now I'd hope that Emmett did it, because I really needed it. I could deal without food for a while; my stomach wasn't ready for it anyway.

For now I took the Motrin, drank some water, and headed to the bathroom for a very long hot shower and a badly needed tooth brushing.

An hour later I was scrubbed clean and dressed in my favorite sweats. My headache had even eased a little bit. I needed to eat something, but if I went downstairs I wouldn't be able to avoid Alice's assault. So for the second time in twenty-four hours, I was considering climbing out a window. Unfortunately, my room was on the second floor, overlooking the hot tub and concrete patio. Not good options for jumping.

I sat down on the edge of my bed to consider a nap instead of food. That's when I noticed the note that had been stuck under my door. I walked over and picked it up.

**I left you some things outside your door. I won't bother you again. When you want to talk, I'll be here. I'm not leaving either. Alice.**

I opened my door to see what she left me. In typical Alice style, there was a large gift basket and a cooler next to it. In the gift basket there was a Western omelet from Bob Evans with home fries and biscuits, saltine crackers, a fresh fruit salad, some silverware rolled in napkins, and a very pretty arrangement of lilies. Huh. Apology flowers.

In the cooler there was a six pack of Orange Sunkist and six bottles of water. Orange Sunkist, Alice knew, was always my hangover remedy, and something I was desperately craving.

Reluctantly I pulled the food and drinks into my room and set them on the dresser. She had, after all, solved my only dilemma with regard to my solitary confinement. I grabbed the omelet, silverware, and an orange Sunkist, and then sat at my desk.

After my breakfast I laid on my bed watching my ceiling fan, and let my thoughts wander. I allowed myself to acknowledge the different feelings that Edward could stir in me.

There was the obvious searing pain that I felt in my chest every time I thought about how he had betrayed me. He'd betrayed my trust, my love, my faith; everything in me that I'd given to him. That betrayal had ripped a hole in me with harsh ragged edges. For a long time that pain would hit me out of nowhere, and I'd find myself doubled over like the wind was knocked out of me. But slowly, the blistering, searing pain had softened. I still hurt, but I could manage it. It wouldn't take my breath away anymore. Now it was fresh and raw again.

I was barely able to shove it aside to explore the other feelings that surprised me. They were more subtle, but still there. First, there was the fresh ache that our strong sexual attraction would leave me feeling. It was the ache that would throb when I needed sexual release. Unfortunately, he could still have that effect on me.

It was there from the first time I met him and never completely went away. It was the aching hunger that only Edward had ever been able to quench for me. I couldn't ignore it. Ever since I had experienced the ecstasy that making love to Edward could bring me, that ache would never fully go away. I knew that now, but learned to live with it. In fact, as lousy as I felt right now, it wasn't much of an issue.

Somewhere, deeper than the aching sexual need, and the searing pain of his betrayal, there was glowing warmth. It was like the warmth that came from light, like the warmth your skin feels when the sun finally breaks through on a cloudy day. It was warmth that I didn't think I'd ever feel again. And now that I'd felt it again, I realized just how cold I had grown over the last four years.

Now that Edward was back, even if I didn't want him or ask to have him back in my life, he was, and I couldn't deny it. I looked back over the last four years and realized that, day by day all of the color in my life had slowly faded until it had turned bleak, cold, colorless, and dreary. The second I heard his voice again, the light came back, the color returned, and the warmth enveloped me.

At the same time I'd been hit with the searing pain of his betrayals, the ache of my sexual need to be filled by him, and the warmth that only he could bring to my life.

I could walk away from him again. I knew it was an option. And if I did, that pain would slowly ease and become manageable again. The sexual ache would always be there, never fully satisfied, but I could live with that. However, I wasn't sure that I wanted to go back to the cold, bleak, colorless days that were my life without Edward.

I realized the choice ahead of me left only those two options. I could feel the warmth of Edward back in my life and risk another immensely painful wound. Or I could protect myself from that harshest of pain and go back to my cold colorless life again. The decision before me became painfully clear and agonizingly difficult to face. I curled myself into a ball and cried again. Cried for the loss, the pain, the betrayal, and finally I cried because as much as I tried to deny it, I still wanted him. Worse, I still loved him.

I laid in my bed and curled into myself to explore the familiar feelings, probably allowing myself to feel the warmth for longer than I should have, but I'd earned that much, hadn't I?

Then I was struck by a somewhat amusing analogy. I thought of the old movie, "The Wizard of Oz".. I was Dorothy, living on a dusty farm in black and white. And then Edward hits like a tornado, spinning my world and twisting it around, opening the door to a new world full of warmth and color again. To walk away from Edward would be like the end of the movie, when she returns to Kansas, and everything is cold, dusty and colorless again. I know it was supposed to be a happy ending, but to me, it had always struck me as sad. I'd been living in black and white for four years now; I missed the color.

Eventually, I drifted off to sleep.

My dreams were memories from the night before. Maybe I wasn't actually sleeping, but unconsciously letting myself wander through it all without trying to control my thoughts. I explored his expressions, letting them fully register with me. I recognized the apprehension on his face when we'd first looked at each other and the pain when I told him I hated him; it had hurt him. That realization gave me strength. I was glad to know that I could hurt him too.

Then I examined a short scene from the night before, I remembered that something odd had registered with me, so today in the safety of my bedroom I went through it again, but in slow motion. I was watching in awe as Edward was laughing at something Alice had said. I was analyzing the way his smile made his eyes crinkle and illuminate his entire face. It was open and genuine and made me smile instinctively as I watched. But then he'd turned to look at me and the twinkling light in his eyes was extinguished, replaced with sadness.

My eyes shot open and I gasped. Holy crap! This hurt him too! Not only could I affect him with my words, but it hurt him to be around me, just as much as I hurt to be near him. So why was he doing this?

After that sleep eluded me. I tossed and turned. I spent my time, pacing, giving myself a manicure, and flipping channels on the TV. Daytime TV sucks. I wish I had a movie, but that would require asking Alice to bring me one. Not going to happen.

Around 6:00 that evening another note was stuck under my door.

**24 hours of solitude is all that is healthy. 10:00 tomorrow you come out on your own or we're coming in after you. Then we talk. For now, there's more food outside your door. Alice.**

_Interesting. _I opened my door and found a small pizza box and salad. This time there was another note.

**There is Moose Tracks ice cream and chocolate sauce downstairs. But if you want it, you have to come and get it. I'm not delivering.**

_Damn. She was good. But I'm not budging yet._

I had to admit, her patience was paying off. I didn't feel like throwing shoes at her anymore. Even if she had set it all up just because Edward was Jasper's cousin, it wasn't _totally_ unreasonable to hope that I could be civil around him.

Honestly, she probably had no idea how much I still thought about him. I hadn't really talked about him in a very long time. In fact, whenever his name came up I abruptly changed the subject or left. I had some pretty thick walls built around that part of my heart.

Alice had never, ever, betrayed me before. As angry as I was, I was growing more and more curious. What could have possibly possessed her to think that it was a good idea?

I thought back to the last couple of months. Actually, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that Alice had brought up Edward repeatedly in subtle little ways.

We had driven by a house that was under construction and there was a sign still out front indicating that he'd designed it. She'd commented on his talent, and I, of course, called it cold and lifeless, just like Edward.

Another day she came in and just said, "I saw Edward today."

I just snorted and said, "Did you punch him for me?" Then I just walked away without letting her go on any further.

While we were having lunch she asked, clear out of the blue, "Do you think you and Edward could ever, like, be friends? Or just be able to be around each other, socially?"

I had responded with some wiseass comment about preferring to volunteer for some kind of medieval torture, and then sidetracked her by talking incessantly about the upcoming Parade of Homes, detailing each home until I was sure she had forgotten about the topic at hand.

_Awe crap! _She had been trying to tell me. And I had made it next to impossible.

I decided to take a long hot bath.

As I soaked, I thought about the project some more. Was the project with Tia and Benjamin just a coincidence? Probably. It wasn't very likely that two people were going to get engaged, decide to build a house, and contract my services just so that I would be forced to talk to Edward again.

Tia had apologized profusely as I'd walked them out to their car. She was sweet and seemed genuinely shocked to realize the connection. She and Edward had dated for a year and a half and had broken up six months before he introduced her to Benjamin. She was still friendly with him.

It surprised me that Edward had been able to have an eighteen month healthy relationship that he ended on good terms. It was a stark contrast to our history. That stung a bit.

Tia said that it had run its course and they just weren't right for each other. She apologized again and said that he just didn't talk about me very much. She looked at the ground for a minute, and then looked back at me sheepishly.

"It had always seemed like a painful topic for him. I probably would have pushed him for more details if I had thought that he and I had a chance together, but it just wasn't there for me either."

That was just dumbfounding. I couldn't imagine being with Edward and saying that it 'just wasn't there for me either'. How could it not 'be there' for anyone when it came to Edward?

Okay, so there was something wrong with Tia. She seemed really happy with Benjamin, and he was handsome, charming, and had good taste. But he was _no_ Edward.

I dried off and yawned. I was exhausted, mentally and physically. Surprising, since I hadn't left my room all day. So I put on my pajamas, crawled into bed and decided to watch some mind-numbing Thursday night TV. I was half-way through "The Office" when I fell soundly asleep.

Somewhere around one in the morning I awoke. I turned off the TV and rolled over, trying to fall back to sleep. Unfortunately, in the middle of the night the walls were always down. I was suddenly sobbing uncontrollably. I just let it happen, because eventually, you can't hide from the pain anymore. I cried until sometime after three o'clock before drifting off to sleep again.

**Saturday Morning**

A little after eight-thirty I blinked awake. I lay in bed thinking some more for a while. I was surprised to find that I was actually coping. During the night I'd explored all the raw edges of the hole that Edward had ripped open again. So today, I could attempt to shove that aside and feel the warmth for a bit. It acted as a kind of lidocaine. I felt a little better, almost numb actually.

I climbed out of bed and took a long hot shower, dressed and dried my hair. Then I waited. It was exactly 10:00 when Alice knocked on my door. I was being stubborn, so I didn't answer. I didn't generally respond well to threats and demands. Especially from someone who had wronged me like she had.

I acknowledged now that she had been trying to tell me, but what she did was still just totally fucked up.

A few minutes later Rosalie knocked on my door. "Bella, you need to come out now."

"No."

"Yes. Either you come out, or we're coming in after you."

_What the fuck did that mean? How exactly were they going to 'come in after me'? _

I waited and about fifteen minutes later the doorbell rang. I heard muffled voices coming up the stairs. Was that Emmett?

They were going to have Emmett talk me out of here? I snorted at the thought of Emmett trying to be sensitive and persuasive. _This should be good. _

But he never tried to talk to me. They just talked amongst themselves outside my door.

"She hasn't come out at all? What, has she got a jar in there to pee in?"

Rosalie huffed. "God Emmett, she has her own fucking bathroom."

"Oh. Well what do you want me to do?"

"Get her out." Alice said firmly.

"How?"

"However you can. Take off the door if you need to."

Emmett thought for a minute. "I suppose I could pop off the casing and remove the door, jamb and all. There will be some damage though. The door will be okay, but there might be some wall repair and you'll have to have it recased and repainted."

Alice and Rosalie answered him together. "Do it."

I could almost hear him shrug outside the door. "Okay, I'll go get my tools." Then I heard his voice moving back down the hallway. "You girls don't mess around."

_Holy shit! He wasn't kidding! They weren't playing!_

Okay, I'm stubborn and all, but this is ridiculous. I hopped off my bed and flung the door open to find Alice and Rosalie standing there leaning against both sides of the hall with their arms folded. They just looked at me with big eyes.

"Fine, I'll come out. Lets _talk_." My voice was dripping with sarcasm.

I shoved my way past them, down the stairs, and into the kitchen. Emmett was just coming back inside with his tool box, an electric screw driver, and a crow bar.

He didn't notice me standing in the kitchen pouring myself a cup of coffee. I called out to him before he got too far up the stairs. "Don't worry about it Emmett, I'm out."

He turned with a smile and said "Oh, damn. That was going to be a cool story." Then he shrugged and looked at me seriously before asking, "You okay?"

I shrugged back at him but didn't say anything.

"Give her a chance, Bella. She was really upset when she got home the other night. She really was just trying to help, in a messed up sort of way."

Alice and Rosalie were coming down the stairs behind him. Emmett gave each of us a quick nod.

"Okay then, I guess my work here is done. You all play nice over here. And Bella, if you need anything, you can always call me. I know a lot of time's gone by, but I still think of you like a sister."

I smiled and said, "thanks Emmett, me too. I missed you."

With that he headed out the door to his truck.

Alice, Rosalie and I all settled into the living room. But no one wanted to start.

Rosalie finally sighed and started. "Look, I'm trying really hard to be sympathetic but you're not the first person to get your heart broken."

Alice gasped and hissed, "Rosalie!"

Rose just arched her eyebrows and looked at her. "What? I don't get it. I don't know the whole story. You've tried to explain it to me, but I'm not getting it. Maybe it would help if I heard the whole story from Bella's side. Seriously Bella, it helps to talk about it. I've told you all about Royce, so why don't you tell me about you and Edward."

For whatever reason, I'd been avoiding talking for so long, and now I wanted to. Maybe it was because I had to make this decision. Whatever the reason, I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Okay, I'll tell you; the whole thing. I should probably start at the beginning, when I first moved to Forks in 1992."

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**A/N – Buckle your seatbelts…cause here we go! **

**Ticket price: your review! Just kidding – yeah, I'm that cheesy, but **_**seriously…**_**I'm struggling with some serious writer's block trying to get my 16 year old groove on. So, feed my ego and help me out!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I'm not Stephanie. Don't pretend to be – just love her peeps.**

_A/N: Again, special props go out to TwirlGrrl, she's an awesome beta!!_

_Most of the rest of this story will be in the context of Bella telling the story of her and Edward to Alice and Rosalie through flashbacks. I will always preface the flashback with a timeframe, at which point it will be told in realtime from Bella's perspective unless otherwise noted._

_If this gets confusing, please tell me so that I can help clarify it._

* * *

**Ch 5**

**BPOV**

_Rose just arched her eyebrows and looked at her. "What? I don't get it. I don't know the whole story. You've tried to explain it to me, but I'm not getting it. Maybe it would help if I heard the whole story from Bella's side. Seriously Bella, it helps to talk about it. I've told you all about Royce, so why don't you tell me about you and Edward."_

_For whatever reason, I'd been avoiding talking for so long, and now I wanted to. Maybe it was because I had to make this decision. Whatever the reason, I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. _

_"Okay, I'll tell you; the whole thing. I should probably start at the beginning, when I first moved to Forks in 1992."_

"So, I've told you about my parents, right? They grew up in Forks, married young, and had me. Mom couldn't take living in a small town anymore and bailed, taking me with her. We ended up living in Phoenix, Arizona until I moved back to Forks when I was sixteen."

Rosalie and Alice nodded and let me continue.

"And you know my Mom, Renee, has had some problems with mental instability. For most of my life that was just, well, Renee, she had always been sporadic and unpredictable, but it was just the way she was. She jumped in and out of relationships, falling hopelessly in love over and over again. Inevitably, it would implode and she'd scream and cry and be depressed while I helped to put together the pieces."

"And then she met Phil, and he was like her rock. He tempered her overly enthusiastic pace, tolerated her mood swings, held strong against her volatile temper and, generally, kept her feet on the ground. They were married, and I was relieved when he took over as her care-taker for me. And then Phil got signed and had to start traveling. "

"The first time he left, she was depressed, but coped. The second time, she cried a lot, but still got up, went to work, and did the things a normal person does. The more he left, though, the worse it got. Eventually, when he left she would just go to bed and not get up until the day he came home. She didn't want me to tell him, but eventually she lost her job from all the absences. Phil figured out that something wasn't right and cornered me, so I finally told him what had been going on. She flipped – and I mean flipped out; she was screaming and crying. "

"Phil took Renee to a therapist and they gave her some anti-depressants and they helped. Phil wasn't even traveling, it was off-season. Over the Holidays that year, she was really happy again. She decorated every inch of the house and shopped like crazy and even baked – not that it was very edible. There was one bad night when Phil found out how much she'd spent Christmas shopping. She was screaming and yelling again, but other than that, she was happy."

"Then Phil had to travel again, just for a couple of days. I thought she'd be able to handle it. At the very least, I thought _I _could handle it, but it did not go well. The day he left, she wouldn't get out of bed. I made her eat, but she actually vomited. I told her she had to get out of the bed so I could change the sheets, and she flew into another rage, crying and throwing things, and finally she hit me. I think that is what upset her the most, when she realized what she'd done. She locked herself in the bathroom and it scared the hell out of me. There were all kinds of pills and razors and who knows what in there. So I finally called the police and an ambulance came and took her to the hospital."

"Phil flew home and we met with the doctors. She was diagnosed as clinically depressed and needed to be hospitalized to receive treatment. The doctors warned that once she was released, she would need to be monitored to ensure that she was taking her meds properly. Phil wasn't comfortable putting that responsibility on me, so Renee was going to travel with Phil. Since I was only sixteen, it was decided that I couldn't be left alone all the time. So, I packed up my measly life and moved to Forks to live with my Dad."

Rosalie commented "Wow that had to have been hard. High School is such an important time for a kid – I can't imagine having to pack up and leave in the middle of it."

"Yeah, but I'd been taking care of Renee for so long, that it turned out that living with Charlie, suited me well enough. We are actually quite similar personalities, and he loved the idea of having me there. I missed my mom, but Charlie is more laid back. But Forks High was the weird part. It was such a small school compared to Phoenix. I'll never forget my first day. That's when I met Edward and Emmett."

**_FLASHBACK – FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL – Feb 3, 1992_**

"I really am sorry about this." Charlie frowned at me as he parked the car. He had apologized, no less than five times now. He had no idea what a relief it was to be dropped off this early. Seriously, I didn't need my first impression to be a drop-off in the Chief's cruiser. So when the phone rang and Charlie was called in to work, it meant he needed to drop me off a half hour early. I was thrilled.

"Honestly Dad, for the hundredth time, it's fine. It will give me a little extra time to learn my way around. I'll be fine." I climbed out of the car and scanned the mostly vacant parking lot. Only a few cars were parked here; there was a Buick, a couple of mini-vans, a Volvo, nothing that looked like it might belong to a teenager.

"Okay, okay, and when I get home tonight we'll go look for a car." Part of the deal of my moving here was to have my own car. The chief worked odd hours and it was only practical for me to have my own transportation in a small town like this – there wasn't exactly a public transit system.

"Okay, sounds good." I nodded as I grabbed my bag from the back seat. "Bye Dad."

I turned to face the building that was to be my home away from home for the next two and a half years. It was an old, dark brick building with large steps leading up to the front entrance. Two concrete benches flanked either side of the steps where I imagine students would begin gathering in a little while to wait for the first bell.

I started up the steps to the front doors, pulling them open and found myself in the front entryway. Fortunately, the office was located just off to the side, so that wasn't hard.

I swung the door open, and made my way to the counter. I could hear the two secretaries chatting in the back office, some kind of idle chatter about last nights Sunday Night movie. I waited patiently and then did a fake throat clearing trying to get their attention.

A plain looking woman poked her head out to peek into the front office. "Oh! My dear, I'm sorry, I didn't realize anyone was out here. What can I do for you?" She came around carrying her cup of coffee.

"Um, my name is Bella Swan, I was told to ask for Ms. Cope. I'm transferring here from Phoenix and need to pick up my schedule."

"Oh yes! You found me. I have everything ready for you. I bet your Dad is so happy to have you here. He is such a nice man." She pulled a file from a vertical organizer. "Okay, here we are."

She handed me a few slips of paper including my locker assignment and combination, my schedule, a map and a pass that I should have each teacher sign and turn in at the end of the day.

I took a minute to study the map, trying to roughly locate myself and most of my classes before heading out into the hallway. I cringed at the idea of having to reference it in the hallway; nothing says New Student like carrying a map through the hallways.

"Hang on a moment dear, I have an idea." She leaned back around the corner to another office. "Mr. McCarty, dear, will you come here please?" I heard someone say "Sure" from the office and some moving around.

Ms. Cope walked back towards the front desk and smiled at me. "Emmett McCarty is also a sophomore, so many of your classes will be near one another, I bet he wouldn't mind showing you around, would you Emmett?"

Emmett walked through the doorway, smiling at me, "Sure Ms. Cope, I'd be happy to."

"Oh good, Emmett, this is Isabella Swan, she just moved here from Phoenix."

He came towards me with a great big smile on his face. For a sixteen year old, he was huge, almost six feet tall, muscular with just a trace of pre-pubescent chubby to soften him up a little. He had dark curly hair and big blue eyes. He was carrying a backpack and letterman jacket in one hand and stuck out his other hand to shake mine. "Hi Isabella, I'm Emmett."

"Just Bella, actually. Hi. Its, um, nice to meet you." He had huge hands and I had a flashback to holding my Dad's hand when I was a little girl. Emmett could have crushed my hand, I'm sure, but he was gentle instead.

He nodded. "Yeah, you too Bella, welcome to Forks." And then he turned to Ms. Cope, "Does this mean that I can go for today?"

"Yes, Emmett, and please don't be late again tomorrow morning; I don't want to have to tell Mr. Warner."

"I know, Ms. Cope, I'll work on it; Edward just hates that he has to come in this early too." Ms. Cope just smiled and nodded as Emmett turned and pushed open the door to the hallway for me.

I looked up at Emmett, he was really, really big, and would probably be really intimidating if he wasn't always smiling. "Thanks for this Emmett, I really appreciate it."

"No, thank you, you were my 'get out of jail free' card. Let me see your schedule." He grinned at me.

I handed him the slip of paper but had to ask about the get out of jail free card. "What do you mean?"

He shrugged. "Before and after school detention."

_Oh? _I had a hard time envisioning this big lug getting into any real trouble. "What did you do?" I blurted out before thinking. "Sorry, none of my business."

He just laughed. "Nah, it's okay, it was just a bet- a stupid prank that went bad. There was this girl, Lauren, in my science class that had a science project that she was working on all semester, tracking something to do with fish. I don't know what it was, really. Anyway, she has a thing for my cousin. And she's pretty pushy about it and he doesn't really like her, but he's too polite to make the point clear. So I joked about throwing a bunch of Alka Seltzer in her fish tank to distract her and see what the fish would do. One thing led to another, and pretty soon it turned into a bet. It was stupid; he always beats me at Mortal Kombat."

I snorted. "What happened?"

"He found some book in one of his bookstores with a bunch of codes for the kill combinations. The kid just reads way too much." Emmett was shaking his head like reading too much was some kind of disease that required treatment.

I laughed loudly. "No, I mean with the fish tank."

"Oh! The fish did not like the plop-plop, fizz-fizz. They died, and I got before and after school detention for the rest of the year."

I liked Emmett immediately. He walked me to my first few classes and introduced me to everyone – he literally knew _everyone_. I realized that I wasn't able to define any of the normal social circles that were at most High Schools. In Phoenix, the current fashion trends made it visibly obvious who was on the cutting edge and who wasn't. I had always struggled to keep up with the speed of the changing trends and my somewhat plain, universally generic style settled for somewhere in the middle between front line coolness and outdated dork. But here, everyone seemed to blur together with similar forms of the bulky layering that was necessary in the cold wet climate. I actually felt like the trends of this small town were more my speed. Since Emmett treated everyone the same, there were no obviously defined social groupings.

Then I had my AP American Literature class, which was in a different part of the school, so Emmett pointed me in the right direction and said that he would see me at lunch. Fortunately, the school wasn't really that large and I found my way soon enough. With time to spare, I found the classroom, had Mr. Harris sign my pass and found a seat towards the rear of the room and waited while everyone else filed in.

It was technically a junior level class, so most everyone was unfamiliar to me. I just sat watching as each of them made their way to their seat; some noticed me, some didn't. That's the first time I saw _him_. With seconds to spare, he nearly skidded through the doorway and quickly found his seat. He sat down gracefully in the row next to mine, just a few seats ahead. He never noticed me, but I had a perfect vantage point to sit and stare at him for the duration of the class; something I knew I'd be doing every day from now until the end of the year.

He was tall and thin, but muscular with reddish-brown hair - the color of a slightly aged penny - that went all different directions. It appeared that some kind of product was attempting to control the direction, but failed. He was wearing black jeans, a white t-shirt with a denim button down left open over it, and the sleeves rolled up, drawing attention to his muscular forearms. I noticed that his jeans weren't tight rolled, but worn loose over his boots. Phoenix had abandoned the tight-rolled jeans over a year ago, so it was surprising to notice that it was still popular here. This guy was Eddie Bauer meets GQ.

I tried to focus on the subject at hand and was relieved that I'd already covered Transcendentalism last semester. Everyone had been given an assignment to select an author from this time period over the weekend. Today, everyone except me of course, would be discussing their selected author before being excused to the library for research. We started with the student in the first seat and went up and down each row, giving the name of the author and why.

Unfortunately, when it was my eye candy's turn he just cleared his throat and said, "Henry David Thoreau, focusing on Walden". He never gave his own name, because obviously everyone else knew who he was.

As my turn approached I quickly made a decision to go with Margaret Fuller, because she was one of the only women from that era. Only one other person had selected her, and I'd just written a paper on her last semester, so I had an easy head start. So as my turn approached, I was ready to report my choice, but Mr. Harris intervened on my behalf anyway.

"Miss Swan, since you've just joined us today, you are welcome to take a couple of days to familiarize yourself with the discussion and let me know your selection."

I hadn't been asked to stand and introduce myself as I had in a couple of other classes, so I had been enjoying the rare moment of anonymity up until this point. I felt the tell tale red heat of my blush creep up my cheeks as all eyes were suddenly on me. I shook my head quickly and said, "That's alright. I'm already familiar with the transcendental movement; I'll work on Margaret Fuller's Women of the Nineteenth Century."

Mr. Harris' eyebrows arched, "That's quite ambitious; you might try researching some of her articles instead. It might be a more appropriate workload for this paper, unless you've already read Women of the Nineteenth Century."

But I hardly heard a word that he had said to me, because the copper-haired boy had turned to look at me just like everyone else had, but his reaction was completely different. He was staring at me with wide, bright green eyes – the brightest shade of green I'd ever seen before. His expression was one of shock, confusion, and a small amount of hostility. I was positively frozen in his gaze.

Mr. Harris cleared his throat. "Miss Swan?"

I shook my head quickly to snap myself out of it and looked to Mr. Harris. My face felt like it was on fire. Of course, now everyone is going to think I was trying to show off, and I was caught ogling the hottie. "Um, it was assigned at my old school last semester, is that alright?"

"If you think you can handle it, but let's talk more about it in the library."

Once we were dismissed to the library, my copper-haired hottie moved swiftly from his seat and out the door. I followed everyone else to the library, but he was no where to be seen. Several students made small talk with me, welcoming me to town, and by the time class was over I felt almost normal again. Maybe I had imagined his reaction.

When the bell rang I headed toward the general direction of the cafeteria. Emmett caught up to me a few corners away and made jokes while we made our way through the line. He led the way to a table filled with many familiar faces and I started to get nervous because I couldn't remember any names. I shot Emmett a panicked look and, thankfully, he caught on to my dilemma.

We set our trays down and then Emmett pointed at my milk. "Sorry, I should have mentioned it. There's a soda machine, come on; my treat."

"Okay, thanks." I smiled and nodded. We made our way to the soda machine and Emmett whispered out the side of his mouth at me.

"Okay, the blonde guy that never shuts up, that's Mike Newton. Curly brunette is Maggie, one of the most honest people I've ever met – she's a good one. Chatty brown haired girl with the big knockers is Jessica – she may seem nice, but watch your back with her. Eric is the skinny preppy guy, editor of the paper by the way, and planning to do a feature on you. Um who's missing?"

He snuck a glance over his shoulder. "Oh – Lauren. She's not here yet, she's a blonde butter face – and the fizzy fish girl. Probably stalking Edward." He rolled his eyes.

I snorted at the reference to the Alka Seltzer fish tank story, but had to ask for an explanation of his description. "Butter face?"

He grinned, "Sorry, it's how E and I refer to her. When a chick has a rockin' body, but…her... face…" he said the last part slowly, emphasizing it with a shrug. "Butter Face".

"Nice." I shook my head. We headed back to the table. "Oh and thanks for the heads up on the feature article. That is so not going to happen."

We sat back at our table and chatted. Emmett helped me dodge the feature and made a couple of other suggestions for the paper, all sports related. There was a mixture of small talk, mostly Jessica and Mike competing to see who could ask me the most questions about living in Arizona and why I moved to Forks.

Pretty soon Emmett nudged me discreetly and glanced pointedly towards the line of people getting their food. "Do you have any _butter?"_

I followed his line of sight and saw a fairly attractive blonde in clothing intended to emphasize the point. She was literally hanging all over my eye candy from American Lit. She had one hand on his arm, then his chest, and when he turned away from her she reached up to run her fingers through his hair. My unnamed eye candy was trying to disentangle from her, and actually jerked his head away when she touched his hair and shook his head at her.

I watched as Eye Candy paid for his food and then turned our direction. He saw Emmett and started scanning for a seat until he found me. Our eyes locked for a second and his brow furrowed before he paused and turned another direction. He caught Emmett's eye and jerked his head towards the back door. I looked at Emmett who sort of scowled while watching him walk out the back door.

He leaned over to whisper in my ear. "Sorry, that's my cousin Edward. He can be a bit moody and sometimes he eats in his car and listens to music, especially when Butter Face is being really obnoxious. It has nothing to do with you."

_Yeah right. _I might've bought that if it wasn't the second time he'd reacted that way to seeing me today.

I tried to blow it off and immerse myself in the small talk of lunch, but it was kind of hard to ignore the hottest guy you'd ever seen, looking at you like you had the plague and running away twice in under two hours. Eventually the bell rang so Emmett and I referenced my schedule as we left the cafeteria.

"Hey, Biology with Banner; Edward's in your class. At least you'll get to meet him finally." But I noticed Emmett's tone had changed. He was worried about Edward's weird reaction to me too.

"Yeah, he was in my American Lit class too."

"Oh. So you already met?"

"No, he came in right before the bell rang. I don't think he even noticed me." It was a little white lie, but easier to explain than his actual reaction to me, especially since I didn't even understand it.

He walked me to the classroom and then glanced at Edward, who was already sitting at one of the tables. He flashed him the peace sign and a quick nod. I was extremely careful to look anywhere but at Eye Candy, make that Edward. I thanked Emmett again, as I did before each class, and he headed off down the hall to his next class. I waited awkwardly for Mr. Banner to sign my pass, but he was busy talking with another student. I looked around the classroom, noting that there were two students at each table; I had no idea where to sit, so I just waited for him to finish. I grew more nervous as each student filed in and took their seat, leaving the one next to Edward still vacant. Pretty quickly I didn't need Mr. Banner to tell me where I was going to be sitting. There was only one seat left.

Eventually Mr. Banner signed my pass and, as expected, assigned me to the seat next to Edward. I made my way to my new seat, tripping slightly, falling onto my stool. I tried to smile at him, and was about to introduce myself, but the look in his eye stopped me. He was glaring at me, actually glaring.

_What the fuck did I ever do to this guy?_

I would probably be really annoyed at anyone else who treated me this way, but he was just so freaking beautiful. And he was sitting like twelve inches from me, so my heart was pounding. I tried desperately to act cool, but I'm sure I just came off as manic. I was suddenly full of nervous energy, so my knee bounced constantly. I had never been more aware of another person in my life. I flipped my hair to the side of my face so that I could hide behind it, and tried as hard as possible to focus on every word that Mr. Banner said. I took meticulous notes to keep my hands and mind occupied until the bell rang. The second it rang Edward bolted from his seat and nearly ran out the door.

I sat there for a minute and put my face in my hands. This was torture. There was a total God here in Forks, and somehow without saying a single word, I'd made him hate me. _What. The. Fuck._

And then that guy Mike Newton came up and said "Hey!" right in my damn ear and I jumped like three feet. He was begging to get maced or something. But he was oblivious to how annoyed I was and started asking me what class I had next. I looked at my schedule and groaned.

"Ugh, Gym."

"Cool, me too! We're playing volleyball."

_Shit_

"Mike, may I offer you a piece of advice? Stay far, far away from me. One could say that me and fitness equipment could be classified as a weapon of mass destruction."

Mike laughed harder than was necessary and he walked me to my locker where Emmett was waiting.

Emmett smiled, "How was bio? Did you meet Edward?"

I avoided his eyes while opening my locker. "Um, yeah, we're actually going to be lab partners I guess. We didn't get a chance to talk though."

I risked a look at Emmett, but he was grimacing and looking down the hall.

Mike took this opportunity to interrupt. "So Bella and I both have gym now, so I can walk her there and you don't have to."

Emmett looked to me for my approval of this alternative and I smiled and nodded, so he shrugged. "Okay, I'll meet you back here then."

I nodded. "Sure, and thanks again."

"Bella, stop thanking me before and after every class. A big kiss at the end of the day should cover it all." He grinned and jogged away.

_Was he flirting?_

I looked to Mike, but he was glaring at Emmett as he ran off.

_Uh oh. This could be a problem._

Gym was miserable, as expected, and before I knew it my first day was over and I was packing my backpack to head home for the night.

Emmett met me at my locker at the end of the day. "So I have to get to the office for detention, and my folks make Edward stay at the school to wait for me. Otherwise we would offer you a ride home. Is someone picking you up?"

I grumbled, "No, I have to take the bus until we find me a car. Charlie has to stay at the station, not that I'd really want the cruiser picking me up anyway."

"Oh. The buses here suck, so I'd get on the car shopping if I were you. They pick up outside the north entrance," he said, pointing down the hall to a set of doors. "I gotta run, so I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, and thanks again for everything. You made this day a _lot _easier for me."

Emmett looked around and I got worried about the kiss he mentioned earlier. "No problem, but I'm not a fan of PDA, so you'll have to save that kiss for another time." He flashed his special Emmett grin and jogged towards the office. For a big guy he had a lot of extra energy.

I thought about how fortunate I was to meet Emmett on my first day. I realized that I'd already trademarked in my head his smile as the Emmett Grin. I was almost to the north entrance doors when I heard someone call my name. Jessica was running after me. "Hey Bella! I just passed Emmett and he said you had to ride the bus home because you haven't found a car yet. I can give you a ride if you want."

"Thanks Jess, but I don't want to put you out."

"It's no problem, really, and you don't want to ride the buses here. It's a small district so the same buses pick up all the kids from all the schools; after they pickup the elementary kids, you'll be ready to put a bullet in your brain."

"Oh. Okay then, you're probably right."

Jessica babbled constantly on the way to her car and most of the way home. She wanted to know if the fashion trends in Phoenix were any different from Forks, but I kept my thoughts on tight-rolling to myself because she was one of the offenders that I'd noticed. Other than that, I tried to explain that I wasn't the right person to ask. Jessica looked over my current outfit and agreed; that was mildly offensive. But when we were parked in my driveway she finally got to, what I believe to be, the true reason she drove me home.

"So, Bella, spill. What's up with you and Emmett McHottie?"

"You mean Emmett McCarty?"

"Yeah, get it? McCarty, McHottie? So what's the deal, he was following you around all day today."

"I think you mean _showing_ me around. He was in the office this morning when I went to get my schedule, so Ms. Cope asked him to show me around today."

"Oh! So you guys aren't, like, a thing?"

I laughed a little, not that I would mind dating Emmett, he was certainly good looking and really nice and funny. A big teddy bear, actually, but I wasn't really into the big muscular types. I was more into the tall, lean, and mysterious. Like his cousin, who apparently hated me for reasons unbeknownst to me.

"No, we're not a thing; not at all."

"Oh, okay, I should have realized. You probably aren't his type anyway. I hear he prefers blondes with big boobs."

'_Thanks for that' – said the brunette with the B cup. 'When are you planning on coloring your hair, Jessica?'_

"What about his cousin? What's his deal?"

"Edward Masen. Good luck with that. Every girl in Forks is dying to go out with Edward, but apparently no one is good enough for him, so I doubt you'll have a chance."

_Okay, she's just looking to get bitch slapped. _"No, not like that, I don't like him. It's just, Emmett said he can be moody."

"What do you mean moody?" She seemed to think about it for a minute, her brow furrowing. I got the impression that Jessica was a little bit – challenged. "Like give me an example."

This was getting ridiculous; I felt silly asking about a guy that I hadn't ever spoken to and trying to define moody for this girl. "It's just that I sit next to him in Bio and he didn't say a single word to me, he just kind of _glared_ at me. It freaked me out."

"Oh. That's weird. He always talks to me. And always has good manners. He can be kind of serious, and he's like super smart, and reads all kinds of old books, and sometimes sits in his car and listens to all kinds of weird music, like classical stuff, but he talks to me all the time. The Cullen boys both have perfect manners. He's even nice to Lauren, who everyone knows drives him crazy, but he's too nice to tell her to just fuck off. You just probably aren't his type either."

_Huh? Cullen Boys? Color me confused._

I shook my head. "Wait who are the Cullen boys? Aren't we talking about Edward Masen and Emmett McCarty."

"Yeah. They're cousins, but they both live with Dr. and Mrs. Cullen. Mrs. Cullen is Emmett's mom; everyone just calls them the Cullen boys, because it's easier to remember."

"Oh, okay. Well anyway, thanks for the ride. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Sure! Do you need a ride tomorrow morning? I could pick you up."

"No, that's okay, Charlie will drop me off."

"Okay, well if you need a ride home, just let me know."

"Okay." I shut the door and headed in the house thinking about how either walking home or riding the bus with a hundred elementary school kids would be a more pleasant 'd just insulted my style, hair color, boob size, and confirmed that Edward was not, in fact, moody – he was a saint with perfect manners. I figure I could have told her I was in love with skinny, geeky, newspaper editor, Eric and she would have told me why I wasn't his type either. That was not a ride home; that was Jessica staking out her turf.

_Mental note: Jessica is _not_ your friend._

_**PRESENT TIME**_

"What a bitch!" Alice nearly shouted as I went to refill my coffee.

I huffed a laugh as I remembered Jessica. "Yeah, she really was the stereo-typical two-faced high school bitch."

Rosalie waited for me to come back to the couch. "So what was Edward's deal? Why was he such a dick?"

I shrugged. "I don't really know. I was ready to corner him and ask him what his problem was, but he was gone from school for the next few days. The day he came back I was almost hit by a car that slid on the ice on our way into school. He like totally swooped in and saved me. It was totally superman shit. I was sunk right then."

Alice stopped me. "Wait, you can't just gloss over it like that. 'Totally Superman Shit'. You have to give us details."

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**A/N: Now please go review, because they make me oh so happy! And write oh so quickly!**


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N: As always, TwirlGrrl Rocks! Best ever!**_

_**Yes, you may have noticed, I'm taking some liberty with certain aspects of the original Twilight. I'm un-vamping it and spinning it a bit my way. **_

_**I hope that you will enjoy it as much as I have. **_

_**And as always Stephenie Meyer was the first ,the best, the original Twilight woman, I mean no disrespect – just a fan.**_

* * *

_Rosalie waited for me to come back to the couch. "So what was Edward's deal? Why was he such a dick?"_

_I shrugged. "I don't really know. I was ready to corner him and ask him what his problem was, but he was gone from school for the next few days. The day he came back I was almost hit by a car that slid on the ice on our way into school. He like totally swooped in and saved me. It was totally superman shit. I was sunk right then."_

_Alice stopped me. "Wait, you can't just gloss over it like that. 'Totally Superman Shit'. You have to give us details."_

"Okay, so I spent that first night stewing about what an ass he was to me. I went to school the next day ready to get in his face and ask him what the fuck his problem was, but he never showed up. He was gone the rest of the week.

I thought maybe I'd ask Emmett about it because I got the feeling that he knew something was kind of awkward between us. But I wasn't sure how to even describe Edward's behavior without sounding stupid. Lauren or Jessica, I'm not sure which, finally asked him one day at lunch where Edward was and Emmett just said that he was out of town for a few days on 'personal business'."

"That weekend we were hit with an ice storm on Sunday. I was sure that school would be cancelled, it would have been in Phoenix, but I learned that was not the way of the world in Washington. So Monday morning, I had just parked my truck – _I had a sweet truck, by the way_ – and was walking across the parking lot, when I saw Edward leaning against a silver Volvo. He had apparently been waiting for me because when he saw me, he shoved off the Volvo and started walking up the row of cars on a path to intersect with me."

**_FLASHBACK – 2ND WEEK OF SCHOOL, FEBRUARY 1992_**

_Oh shit, oh shit. There he is. Oh God we made eye contact and now he's coming this way. Should I smile? Not unless he smiles first. If I hurry I can get past him and then he'll have to make me stop. _

So, I looked straight past him and kept walking towards the steps. My heart was pounding and I could see him getting closer out of my peripheral vision. I had parked near the end of one of the aisles of cars and he was coming from my left, up the first row and would probably catch me if I didn't hurry.

The pavement was still icy, but starting to melt. There weren't any curbs outlining the parking lot, so the water was collecting in slushy, muddy puddles where grass met the pavement at the end of each row of parked cars. Instead of walking around the row I crossed one of the grassy medians between two rows at a jog; I could move faster in the grass because it wasn't icy. On the other side, I cut between a red Chrysler Lebaron and an old Oldsmobile Cutlass, holding onto the cars so I wouldn't fall on the slippery pavement.

I was nervous about slipping and falling in front of Edward, and so focused on getting past him before he reached me, that I never recognized the sound of screeching tires coming from my right where traffic entered the lot. I had just stepped out from between the two cars when I heard Edward yell.

"Bella! Look out!" I looked up at the sound of his voice shouting my name.

Suddenly everything seemed to move in slow motion. I had forgotten what a great voice he had and wondered why he was shouting at me. My feet froze to the ground as I watched Edward sprint in my direction. He jumped onto the trunk of a rusty Ford Tempo, launched himself off the roof, then across the hood of the car in front of it. As he was about to jump off of that car, I realized that he kept looking between me and something to my right.

I finally peeled my eyes from the terrified look on Edward's face to see a large van sliding in my direction. It was close and moving closer. I was frozen in place. The van was going to crush me against the Lebaron.

All of a sudden I felt the air forced out of my lungs as my body was knocked off the ground. Arms were tightly wrapped around me and I was lifted through the air. Edward caught me, spinning me away from the van, he threw himself across the trunk of the large Oldsmobile Cutlass, rolling us over it on his back, out of the way just before the van clipped the bumper and slammed into the Lebaron parked next to it. Edward and I rolled off the other side of the Cutlass and landed with a smack into the cold wet, muddy, grass and puddles I'd been avoiding.

"Oof," I huffed right into Edwards face. I had landed on my back with Edward right on top of me. He was staring into my eyes with a panicked look on his face.

The he spoke his first words to me. "Bella are you alright? Are you hurt? Did I hurt you?"

"No, I'm okay. Are you hurt?"

"No. I'm fine. Oh my God. I thought that van was going to crush you."

Lying right there in the cold, wet, mud, with Edward on top of me I started to cry. Ordinarily, I would try to be tough, but it didn't work. Edward's beautiful green eyes which were completely panicked a second ago, were now looking at me with concern.

Tears started streaming out of my eyes and he reached up to wipe them away.

He slid his body off of mine and kneeled in the mud, leaning over me. "Are you sure you're not hurt?"

I shook my head. "No, I'm sorry, I'm fine. I don't know why I'm crying."

"Shh, it's okay; you almost got creamed just now. I think I'd be a little worried about your sanity if you weren't crying."

I heard a bunch of panicked voices coming towards us and started wiping off my face in frustration. "Oh God."

He stood up and offered me a hand. We both started to laugh at the wet sticky sound my back made when he pulled me out of the mud.

Then I turned and saw what was left of the back end of the Lebaron; where I would have been crushed. I swayed a little and looked at Edward. "Oh my God. You just saved my life."

He smiled and said "Just trying to make a better second impression than the first."

A thousand things ran through my head at that moment, but all that came out was another "Oh my God!" Then I threw my arms around his neck.

Edward, this total stranger who had treated me like I had the plague the first time I'd seen him, wrapped his arms around me, squeezed, and laughed. "It's okay."

_Whoa! That hug was worth a near-death experience. _

I knew that second that I'd rather be in Edward Masen's arms than anywhere else in the entire world.

A crowd was gathering around us by then and people were yelling and asking questions. I was leaning against the front bumper of a car next to Edward when I heard sirens wailing. Suddenly Charlie shoved his way through everyone and grabbed me into a huge hug.

"Bella are you okay? They said on the radio that a girl got hit by a car."

"I _almost_ got smushed _between_ a van and a car. Edward grabbed me and pulled me out of the way."

Charlie looked from me to Edward and back again. "Edward, I owe you a good deal of gratitude young man." Charlie stuck his hand out to Edward.

Edward shook it, looking uncomfortable with the attention. He looked at me and noticed that I was shaking; I was completely soaked in wet muddy water. "You should probably take her home. I accidentally threw her in a big mud puddle when I pulled her out of the way."

He actually looked towards the ground where we'd landed like he was ashamed of the erroneous judgment he used in his choice of landing.

I laughed and put my hand on his arm. "I may be cold, but at least I'm not dead, thanks to you."

He gave me a half smile but kept looking away. "Well anyway, you should um, go get warm."

"Yeah okay, you too, you're not so dry yourself."

Charlie watched as they helped Tyler out of the van and onto a stretcher. He looked back at me and Edward. "Yeah, you should go home and change too. Bella, go get in the cruiser, I need to stay here and look after this young man. I'll find someone to take you home. Edward, are you hurt at all?"

"No, sir, I'm fine, just wet."

"Okay, but I'd prefer if you didn't drive yourself. You look okay, but you might be more shaken than you realize. Is there someone else that could drive you home?"

Edward nodded and pointed at Emmett, who had apparently just heard about the accident and was running towards us. "Yes sir, there's Emmett; he can drive me. He could drive Bella home too."

Emmett hadn't reached us yet, but he was yelling, apparently pretty freaked out. "Holy shit! What the fuck happened? Somebody said they saw you jump in front of a fucking van. Are you okay?" Then he caught sight of Charlie and cleared his throat. "Sorry sir, I mean, what happened?"

Charlie overlooked the language and let Edward mumble a quick explanation. Charlie went and found some blankets from the ambulance for me and Edward. When he came back he looked at the three of us. "Okay, Emmett you drop Bella off and then you boys go straight home and call Carlisle. Bella you wait at home for me. I'll go tell the office you are going home for now but they should expect you back within two hours. If you are going to be longer than that, then Carlisle or Esme should call the office."

Charlie stuck out his hand to Edward again. "I'm going to call Carlisle when I get a chance to tell him what you did here. You should be proud of yourself; that was very brave."

I didn't know who was more awkward- Police Chief Swan voicing hero worship for the sixteen year old, the sixteen year old who apparently didn't know what to do with the hero worship, or me standing there shivering, dripping, and drooling over Edward Masen, my own personal Superman – the newer hotter version from the new TV show. Emmett, Edward and I climbed into the silver Volvo. It was a pretty amazing car for a couple of kids. "Wow, this is a nice car." I was nervous about getting mud in it and worked to make sure the blanket covered every part of me that came in contact with the car.

Emmett answered me from the front. "It's Edward's. His Dad got it for him for his birthday. I need to bring up my grades before my folks will get me a car."

Edward shot Emmett a dirty look that I didn't understand.

Emmett insisted on a play by play about the accident. I started from when I parked my truck, pretending I'd never noticed Edward until he yelled my name, since that's what I'd been doing before the accident. Edward started from the point of seeing the van losing control. I noticed that he left out the part about why he was trying to intersect with me from the beginning.

From there we took turns with the details until we got to the point that he'd caught up to us. By that point we were parked in my driveway.

"Huh, you know, Jessica drove me home last week and never asked where I lived, and now you didn't either."

Emmett smiled at me. "It's a small town Bella, and every night there's a police cruiser parked in your driveway. I'd bet the whole town knows where you live. Dude, what were you doing in the parking lot anyway?" Emmett strung the two random thoughts together without any indication that he'd even changed who he was addressing, with the exception of changing his gaze to look at Edward by the end.

"Oh, um, I was actually waiting for Bella."

My eyebrows arched. "Oh? Did you need something?" I was talking to the back of his head since I was sitting behind him.

"Well, I kind of wanted to apologize for being a dick last week. I was going through some shit, and I thought you kind of looked like someone. It took me by surprise and I didn't handle it very well. So…sorry."

"Oh, well, I didn't really notice anything anyway, and if you were a dick, you've more than made up for it this morning. So, I'd say I owe you one now."

_Liar liar pants on fire! You were a total dick. And who did I remind you of, Medusa?_

I climbed out of the car and leaned back in the door. "Thanks for saving my life, oh, and for driving me home."

I started to waddle to the front door, my clothes soggy with mud, when Edward rolled down his window, "Bella?"

I turned back, "yeah?"

"Let's just call it even, okay?"

_Not even close, unless 'even' is me worshipping the ground you walk on._

I shrugged casually. "Okay, sure."

I trudged up the front steps and in the front door. Then I watched out the window to make sure they were gone before I stood on the blanket and hurriedly stripped out of my boots and pants, they were the muddiest parts. Then I ran upstairs so Charlie wouldn't catch me in my underwear and finished stripping in the bathroom. I took a long hot shower, and by the end of it I was giddy and dancing, mentally dissecting every word and touch exchanged between me and Edward. I probably should have been in shock, but I was a sixteen year old girl with raging hormones, and that trumped a near-death experience. I redressed, threw all of my muddy clothes in the washer, dried my hair, and was ready to go back to school by the time Charlie got home. Charlie was overprotective and wanted me to stay home the rest of the day. I argued that I was fine, that everyone would be talking about the accident, and I wanted to deal with the rumors before they got too out of control. So he was driving me back to school just in time for lunch. He grumbled the whole way about stupid teenage drivers and I caught enough to know that Tyler already had a speeding ticket on his record and probably wouldn't be driving again until he was at least twenty-one; legally anyway.

After hanging my jacket in my locker, I went to the cafeteria. I'd eaten at home, so I skipped the line and made my way to the table. There was a flurry of excitement when they saw me. Emmett was animatedly re-telling the story as Edward sat by and tried to straighten out the details. Mike jumped out of his seat and insisted that I sit there. I maintained that I was unscathed and didn't need any special treatment. But ultimately, it was Mike's way of getting in on the attention.

I smiled at Edward as I sat down. He nodded and sent a half-smile back my way; though we didn't talk, my heart leapt. I looked around the table while trying to ignore some ugly whispering between Jessica and Lauren, suggesting that I'd walked in front of the van on purpose to get attention.

_Bitches._

Maggie caught my attention and rolled her eyes. I remembered Emmett's words that she was a good one. I spent the rest of lunch helping Edward keep the details straight. Actually, Emmett didn't really exaggerate much on the grand nature of the rescue – it really was just that cool. However, I sensed that Edward didn't appreciate attention much more than I did, because he grew increasingly more uncomfortable and finally made an early escape.

I was excited to get to Biology. I felt like Edward and I had struck a newfound form of camaraderie. So I was running through different wisecracks in my mind about how much mileage the gossip mill was going to get out of this one. When I arrived at the classroom, Edward was already there, writing something in his notebook. He never looked up at me as I noisily sat down.

I offered a quiet "Hi"

He just gave me a quick nod and said "Hey."

My heart sank to my toes. His quiet rejection cut like a knife. So much for camaraderie, apparently _he _didn't feel the same. I felt hot tears burn in my eyes, but blinked them back, feeling embarrassed by my own silly reaction.

He was polite throughout class. He was polite the next day in American Lit. And at lunch when we sat near each other at the same table. And again the next day again in Biology. He was always very…_polite_.

I watched him constantly every day. With Emmett he would crack jokes back and forth, with Eric he would discuss ideas he had for the school paper. He was condescending with Jessica and Lauren in a well-mannered way, he teased Maggie, but in a kind brotherly way. With me he was always…_polite_.

Mike got under his skin; I could tell they were competitive and the rivalry was kind of fun to watch. Mike tried on a daily basis to one-up Edward, but it never worked. Edward was cleverer, faster, stronger and generally better in every way. Witnessing this, I actually felt a little bit of sympathy for Mike. He wanted to beat Edward at something so bad he could taste it. I just wanted Edward so badly I could taste it.

Time went by this way, me pining away for Edward, and Edward always being polite. After several weeks I couldn't even think of the word _polite_ without my heart aching. I think I'd rather go back to the way he acted on my first day, when he was a dick. At least then he _noticed _me.

I'd struck up a friendship with Maggie. It was easy and inevitable, as we sat together every day at lunch and had a couple of classes together. We got together occasionally on the weekends and she was my usual companion at parties. Sometimes we went as a group with Jessica and Lauren, but that was usually when they needed a sober driver, since neither of us drank. We tried to make sure they didn't do anything too stupid, or at least not without being there to witness it.

There was an unspoken understanding that it was us versus them, in typical girl-type competition. Jessica and Lauren continued to make their obvious attempts at snagging Emmett or Edward, and were repeatedly rebuked. I'm not sure if they had a strong preference for either of the Cullen boys, though surely they would have both taken either one of them, so long as neither of them ended up with anyone else, or more specifically, Maggie or me.

As the weather grew warmer the guys would move outside to play hackie sack, where Maggie and I would find a place to sit and talk, watching them casually. She was a good, honest, loyal friend. We had been sitting on the same bench, huddled in our jackets watching them for a few days when it suddenly dawned on me.

I watched Maggie watching the guys play and finally asked her. "Emmett?"

She looked at me smiling, looked back at the guys and nodded. Then she asked me, "Edward?"

I smiled and nodded just like she did, never looking away from them.

I finally looked at her. "How long?"

"Eighth grade." She shook her head slowly. "You?"

"Since my first day." We sat in silence for a few minutes then I tipped my head up and looked at the clouded sky. "Ugh. We're pathetic aren't we?"

Maggie sighed, "Yep."

**_PRESENT TIME_**

"We never said any of those silly things that most girls do about swearing not to tell anyone or any of that other crap. It was unnecessary with Maggie; she would take my secrets to her deathbed."

Alice jumped up and ran into the kitchen. We could hear her rifling through a drawer.

Rosalie turned to me, "So you really liked Dean Cain more than Christopher Reeve?"

She'd lost me, I searched back through everything I'd told them for a Dean somebody. I had nothing. "What? I mean, Dean who?"

"Dean Cain – he played Superman on that old TV show Lois and Clark; Christopher Reeve played the Superman in the movies. I've always wondered who most people thought was hotter. I always thought Dean Cain was hotter too."

I sat there stunned speechless. "I don't fucking know Rosalie! I can't think about that right now!"

Alice finally came running back carrying a Christmas card with a cute little family on it. "Is this Maggie?"

I smiled. "Yup, she eventually got over Emmett, met a guy in college, got married and popped out two kids. She deserves it; she was a really good friend. I should call her, and tell her about this, she'd freak out."

Rosalie was waving her hand, "Yeah, yeah, Maggie's fucking great, send her a fruit basket. Alice, which Superman is hotter, TV Superman or Movie Superman? Original movie Superman, not the new movie Superman that sucked really bad."

Alice blinked and looked at Rose. "Um, Original movie Superman, Chris Reeve, definitely."

Then she flopped back on the couch and turned back to me. "Ok, so how did you finally get together with Edward?"

"Okay, how did I get together with Edward? Mike Newton, actually."

They both looked at me and said "Huh?"

* * *

**PS. I just learned that this story has been nominated for the Indie TwiFic awards. So please go support your favorites. www (dot) theindietwificawards (dot) com**

**And if you have enjoyed this story, please review and tell me so. I apologize if I have failed to reply in the past, just got a bit behind. Your thoughts are very important to me. So please oh please review, review, review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N Thanks again to my wonderful Beta - TwirlGrrl. She's been a humongous help with feedback and insight.**

**As always, don't own Twilight. Don't want to.**

Ch 7

_Then she flopped back on the couch and turned back to me. "Okay, so how did you finally get together with Edward?"_

"_Okay, how did I get together with Edward? Mike Newton, actually."_

_They both looked at me and said "Huh?" _

"Well it wasn't really that straight-forward. He didn't like set us up or anything, in fact, looking back on it I felt kind of bad for him – for a while anyway."

Alice looked confused. "This is the same Mike you dated your senior year?"

I nodded, "Yep. What a mess. As if those two weren't at each other's throats enough." I shook my head at the memories.

"So, the weird awkwardness went on between me and Edward. I couldn't get him out of my head, and Maggie kept saying she thought that he liked me too. But when we were around each other he was just always really –

"Polite, yeah, we got that." Rosalie interrupted me.

I shot her a glare. "Do you want me to tell this story or not?"

"Yeah, but hurry up and get to the good stuff."

"Well the good stuff isn't as good if you don't understand everything leading up to it."

Rose held up her hands in surrender. "Okay, okay, go on."

"Maggie and I were sitting at my house one night doing homework when we got in this argument. Not really an argument, more like a debate."

_**FLASHBACK – MARCH 1992 – CHARLIE'S LIVING ROOM**_

I set the soda next to Maggie on the coffee table. "You're crazy! He doesn't even talk to me."

"He does too. I saw you guys talking on your way out of Bio today."

I scoffed. "Mags we won that stupid golden onion lab. He was just telling me that I could keep the onion because he doesn't really like chocolate as much as most girls seem to."

"Oh."

"You actually spend time alone with Emmett. I shudder to think of the awkwardness of me and Edward alone in a room together."

"Yeah, I'm his math tutor – that's so hot." Maggie rolled her eyes.

"But he's always going on about what an awesome teacher you are."

"That is not a reflection of me, just Mr. Lerner's crappy teaching skills. Emmett is smart – really smart. He just needs more of a hands-on approach. He thinks about things differently. Mr. Lerner only has one way of looking at it."

"But he talks to you, and plays with you, and stuff."

"Yup, he plays with me, and tickles me, and teases me about boys – just like a big brother teases his little sister. That's exactly how he sees me – like a little sister."

"So flirt with him?" It came out like a question. I didn't know how to flirt anymore than Maggie did – especially with Emmett. Quite frankly Emmett was like a big teddy bear to me, so the idea of flirting with him made me a little nauseous.

Maggie groaned and put her face in her hands. "I can't believe I'm telling you this, but I tried."

"You tried? What happened?"

"I tried to giggle more at his jokes and touch his arm and stuff. He thought I was having trouble with my balance. Bella, he asked me if I was drunk!"

I snorted. "Oh no. What did you say?"

"I told him I took too much cold medicine."

I smacked my forehead. "That's why he asked if you were feeling better last week?"

She nodded and her cheeks flushed.

"Well maybe you need to be more obvious."

"Like what?

"Hey – you know that Van Halen song, 'Hot for Teacher'? You should put that on the next time you guys are studying together."

Maggie giggled. "Oh God! Like that wouldn't be awkward. Should I wear a tight red spandex dress too? Maybe I should put my hair in a bun and then shake it out in front of him." Now we were both laughing. "Bella, you shouldn't watch so much MTV."

"I know. Charlie hates it too."

Maggie put her pencil down and looked at me seriously. "Look, back to Edward. I'm serious, I've been paying attention and I really think he might like you. I watch him sometimes and when you aren't looking, he watches you."

"He watches me? Like watches me how?"

"I don't know. He just watches you. Like at lunch. If he gets there before you, he watches you in line until you come to the table. Then he pretends he didn't notice you. I've caught it a few times."

I shook my head. "Maggie, I think you're imagining things. I've been sitting at that table for almost three months now and have never caught him watching me."

"Well, explain this then, today at lunch after you left, Mike started talking about you."

"That's a shocker. Mike talks about everyone."

"Yeah, but he said he was going to ask you to the End of Year Dance. I think he forgot I was sitting there and got all crude and talking about stuff that he thought he could do with you."

Now I was getting pissed. "Are you serious?"

But Maggie was getting excited. "Yeah, but before I could say anything to defend you, Edward got all in his face. He was really mad and said that if he treated you, or talked about you the way he does other girls, he would 'break' him." She used finger quotes around the word break.

_Wow. _"Wow."

"So Mike got all in his face too and was talking a bunch of stuff asking him what his 'fucking problem was'. Mike said he'd given Edward his chance after the whole accident happened and he didn't take it. So you were fair game. Edward said something about not needing Mike to give him a chance, but I didn't hear it very well because he was right in Mike's face and Emmett started trying to separate them. Finally Emmett pulled Edward away and Tyler pulled off Mike before it went to blows."

"No kidding?"

"Yup." She nodded. "So, do you think you'll go to the dance with Mike?"

"Probably not; I'm not really into dances; especially if he's talking about me like that. Don't you think?"

"I don't know. If you go with Mike, Edward could get really jealous. But he could also just ask Jessica or Lauren."

"You think he would?"

Maggie shrugged. "Who knows, but you better decide soon though, because I bet that Mike's going to ask you tomorrow before Edward has a chance."

We finished our homework, watched Real World on MTV, and I took her home. I made dinner for me and Charlie, took a shower, and said goodnight.

Charlie stopped me before I could make it upstairs. "Hey Bells?"

"Yeah Dad?"

"You okay?"

"Sure, why?"

"You haven't said more than two words to me tonight."

"Oh. I'm sorry, I've just got something on my mind."

"Well lay it on me, maybe I can help."

_This oughta be good. _

I'd always told Renee everything she wanted to know, which wasn't much because she was usually caught up in her own drama. But then Phil made an attempt to parent me when he realized how lax she'd become. I learned that if I didn't tell him anything, he got nosy. But if I told him enough awkward stuff he learned to stop asking questions. So I did my best Jessica impression and tried my hand at girlie speed talking.

"Well, Maggie heard this boy saying he was going to ask me to the End of Year Dance. But I like this other boy, but I don't think he'll ask me. Plus, I don't really know how to dance so I'm kind of nervous to say yes to either one because I'll make a fool out of myself. So what do you think I should do?"

At the end I flopped myself down on the sofa next to him and waited for his advice, trying really hard not to laugh. Charlie looked at me panic stricken.

"Oh. Um, well…uh…maybe you should go with whoever asks you first."

"Okay, but I don't know how to dance, do you?" This was a risk, I would die if Charlie tried to teach me.

"Uh, no, but…maybe…we could try to find, like a class for you…or something." Charlie was starting to sweat.

_Should I ask him about tampons? Nah, he might stroke out._

"Okay. Maggie's pretty good at it too, maybe I'll ask her for help."

"Yeah, that's a good idea, probably better to learn from someone your own age."

"Okay then. I'm going to bed, unless there was something else."

Charlie took a gulp of his beer and shook his head.

"Good night Dad."

"Night."

I smiled to myself on the way up the stairs.

_That should get me a few months of peace and quiet._

I didn't sleep well; I kept tossing and turning trying to figure out what I was going to do.

The next morning I wore my best jeans shorts and borrowed one of Charlie's flannels to wear over a tank top. If it was nice outside, I could tie it around my waist. Of course, Charlie would likely complain about my wearing another one of his shirts, but with grunge becoming the new thing, his wardrobe had become a nice supplement to my own.

Avoidance had become my current plan. If I could buy some more time, Maggie said she would pay closer attention for any more signals that Edward might be thinking about asking me. With that plan in mind, I ducked around corners and dodged Mike every chance I got. At lunch I hid in a bathroom while Maggie scouted for Mike and finally came to get me after he'd gone outside. I almost missed lunch service completely, and scarfed down a yogurt and piece of pizza before heading to Biology.

Biology was probably safe. I didn't think that Mike would ask me in front of Edward, but I was worried about avoiding him during gym class.

Imagine my surprise when Mike came over to our table and sat on the corner of it.

"Hey Bella, how ya doing?"

"I'm okay. What's up Mike?"

"Where were you at lunch, I didn't see you."

"I'm not feeling very well, I was getting some air." An idea started to form in my head and I added quickly. "I might go home after this class, actually."

"Oh, well, listen I was wondering, if you might want to go to the End of Year Dance with me."

_Shit. _I realized my mistake a second too late. When I said I was going home soon, he decided he'd better go for it now since Edward sat next to me all hour.

"Um…" Right then I noticed Edward's hand flex into a fist. I almost rejoiced, but I decided to bluff instead. "I'm not really a big fan of dancing, so…"

Mike actually saw that as an opportunity. "Well we don't have to stay long. We could just put in a quick appearance and go find something else to do."

Edward jumped out of his seat. He glared at Mike and then his eyes flashed to me. Then he clenched his jaw and walked to the pencil sharpener to sharpen his pencil. I noticed both of hands were in fists now.

When I looked back at Mike and he had a little smile on his face. He shrugged and looked at Edward. "Wonder what his problem is."

"Yeah, I don't know, that was weird."

"Edward is weird. Oh, hey, are you coming to watch the game on Friday? We're playing Ocasta. It should be a good game. They are having a really bad season; their best pitcher is out…"

I realized Mike hadn't even waited for my answer before changing the subject. He kept watching Edward and babbling on about baseball.

So I played along and kept him talking, hoping he would forget about the dance. Mike looked up as Edward moved into his seat. "We're gonna smoke them aren't we?"

Edward looked at Mike. "Huh?"

"Ocasta. You did hear what coach said about their pitcher, didn't you?"

Edward nodded and shrugged. "Yep, should be easy."

Mike turned back to me then.

"So, what do you think about the dance? You wanna go?"

I suddenly realized that he'd been stalling so that he could wait for Edward to come back.

_Asshole. This is so not even about me._

"Let me think about it Mike. Can I let you know tomorrow?" I decided not to offer any excuses; just let it dangle.

"Oh. Uh, okay, yeah sure. See you guys." He looked at me and Edward, who hardly nodded his direction.

After Mike walked away I noticed that Edward was looking at me. I turned my head and we locked eyes. Just like always, I was powerless to look away. My heart started pounding again and my hands started to shake.

Thankfully, class started and he turned to face forwards.

As always, I struggled to focus my attention and took notes to keep my mind and hands occupied. It was harder than usual because Edward wasn't ignoring me anymore; he kept looking at me.

A few minutes before the end of class he tore a piece of paper out of his notebook, wrote something on it, and slid it my direction.

_**Are you going to go with him?**_

I looked at him and shrugged. He took the piece of paper back and wrote something else.

_**Don't**_

I took the paper and scribbled my own note and slid it back.

_**Why not?**_

Edward pressed his lips together and his brow furrowed. He took a long deep breath and shook his head slowly as he exhaled, but he didn't add anything else.

When the bell rang I quickly collected my books and stuffed them in my bag.

Edward surprised me when I heard him stop me. "Bella wait."

I turned back to him. "What?"

But Mike interrupted us; he usually walked me to gym class next, so he was waiting for me. "Bella, are you coming?"

I looked at Edward and then back at Mike.

"Go on ahead; I don't know yet. I might catch up."

Mike frowned and looked back and forth between us and then slipped out the door.

Edward surprised me by reaching out and taking my bag from my shoulder.

"What are you doing?"

He smirked. "Carrying your bag."

"Oh." He led the way out the door. We walked in silence all the way to my locker. I kept glancing over at him and he did the same to me. There was a small smile playing on his lips. It was the strangest mix of awkward, exhilarating, and comfortable.

The only awkwardness was the topic of Mike hanging over us. We both knew that there was an unfinished conversation hanging out there, but neither of us wanted to be the first to break the silence.

I was exhilarated just being near him, more so because he wasn't required to be there due to random seating arrangements or social graces. He had chosen to carry my bag and walk with me. This was a first and it was, well, exhilarating.

It was also very comfortable to just walk with him. We didn't need to say anything. Anyone else, other than Maggie, would have felt the need to fill the air with random chatter. But we just walked together and I at least, basked in the buzzing of the tension between us.

Too soon, we reached my locker. I fumbled with the combination, oddly nervous, and missed a number. I spun the dial a few times to reset it.

Edward chuckled and leaned against the lockers, one hand in his pocket. "Forget your combination?"

_Yes, you could make me forget my own name._

I shook my head. "No."

I finally managed to open the locker and Edward handed my bag to me. I hung it in the locker, closed it, and turned to face him. I pointed behind him, the direction we'd just come from.

"I have gym, which way are you going?"

He nodded his head towards me indicating the opposite direction, "Trig with Holt."

I nodded. "Okay then."

Edward was still leaning against the locker with that damned crooked smile on his lips. It made me want to _do things _to those lips. I wasn't sure what exactly, just _something._

_Comfortable silence over. Now I'm ready to pee my pants._

We stood there awkwardly for a moment, and I had to keep looking at the floor so that I could keep my composure. He finally sighed, "So, what are you going to tell him?"

I suddenly became irritated. "That's not really any of your business, now is it?"

"No. Probably not." He looked at me.

"But you're still asking."

"Yes." He nodded once.

"Why?"

"Because I don't think you should go with him."

"So? Why not?"

Edward frowned now. "Mike's an ass. You know that."

"Do I now?" I huffed, arching my eyebrows.

"Yes, I think you do."

"Well, there's a dance. And he's asked me, soo…" I let my voice trail off and gave a half shrug, then looked at some invisible object that I was kicking on the floor.

Edward didn't say anything until I looked back up at him. When I did, he locked eyes with me. "But you hate dances, or dancing, rather."

It wasn't a question, and something about the way he was holding my gaze took my breath away; I was transfixed. My mind was void of any reasonably cool response.

I swallowed hard and nodded.

He continued to hold me there. "So, do you like Mike? Is that why you might say yes?"

I shook my head. "No, of course not."

"So if you hate dancing, and you don't like Mike, there's really no reason to say yes, now is there?"

I shook my head again. "No, I guess not."

Edward's eyes suddenly left mine and flashed over my shoulder at the clock in the hallway. "I'd better go, we're about to be late, unless you're going home?"

"No why?"

"You told Mike you weren't feeling well."

I smiled. "Oh, that. No, I'm fine. Maggie told me he was probably going to ask me. I've been avoiding him all day. He's in my gym class, though, so I was considering ditching."

Edward laughed at that. "Nice. Okay, well then I'll see you later?" He flashed me another crooked smile and shoved off the lockers. As he walked past me, he squeezed my arm once and another bolt of electricity shot through me.

"See ya." It came out as barely a whisper. I turned and watched him walk away. When he turned the corner and was out of sight I leaned back against the cold metal of the lockers, tipped my head back and closed my eyes.

_What the _fuck_ just happened. Did he hypnotize me? Had my brain just gone to complete mush from his mere presence?_

I wanted to kick myself with frustration. Now that he walked away I realized how fast my heart had been racing. I stood there as the halls thinned out, trying to catch my breath. I couldn't understand what had happened. I had a plan to keep cool, but then when he looked at me like that, my mind had gone completely and inexplicably blank.

Did I just tell him that I wasn't going to go with Mike?

The bell rang at the moment bringing me harshly out of my thoughts. I collected myself and ran to the locker room to change for class.

The weather was warmer now, so on dry days we played tennis outside. I spent most of gym class dodging tennis balls, because I was so distracted. The more I thought about it, the more irritated I became. Edward hadn't asked me to go with him, he'd only tried to tell me _not_ to go with Mike. For what purpose? If he really cared that much, then why didn't he just ask me?

By the end of the day I was pissed off. I hurried out of my last class, collected my stuff from my locker and ran outside. Edward had baseball practice after school, so I waited outside the gym where he would come out to walk to the field.

He came out with Emmett, laughing and joking around, and looking crazy hot in a wife beater and gym shorts.

"Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?"

He nodded and waved Emmett on ahead. "What's up?"

I lead the way off to the side in case Mike came out; I didn't need him to hear me defending a date with him that I had no intention keeping. I steeled myself against his beautiful green eyes before I turned to face him.

"So, explain to me why you think you have the right to try and talk me out of going to the dance with Mike, exactly."

Edward smiled, actually _smiled, _like he was amused; that pissed me off a little.

"Bella, if you like Mike, then just go with him. If you don't like Mike, then don't go with him. I'm not trying to talk you into or out of anything. It's not that complicated."

That pissed me off more, because again, I was explaining myself. "I don't like Mike, which by the way is _still_ none of your business. But you know, maybe the dance would be more fun than say sitting at home all by myself."

Edward shrugged, "Fine, if you want to go that bad, I'll take you."

I clenched my teeth and growled. I was seeing red, probably from the color that I could feel flaming in my face. "Gee thanks Edward, but I don't need a pity date."

I turned and started to stomp away.

I could hear Edward behind me start to laugh. "Shit. Wait, Bella wait, don't leave."

But he was still laughing. Laughing!!

I turned back to face him. "I'm glad you think this is so fucking funny, you conceited ass. I don't know why you would presume that your opinion even matters to me, but I really don't need your stamp of approval to go to a damned dance – " I stopped because just then Mike stepped out of the gym and was watching me yell at Edward.

I didn't even think before I spoke. I just turned to him and smiled. "Hey Mike, turns out I think I'm good to go."

"Really? Cool, well I have practice right now, but I'll call you tonight and we'll work out the details."

I nodded. "Okay, talk to you later."

I looked back at Edward and he wasn't smiling anymore.

"Not so fucking funny now, huh?"

"Nope, now I just feel bad for Mike."

My jaw hung open speechless. His words had stung. I felt a lump in my throat and tears started to well up in my eyes. I clenched my jaw shut and turned to walk away from him. This time I didn't turn back.

I made it all the way to my truck before the tears overwhelmed me and started streaming down my cheeks. Thankfully by the time I'd gotten to the parking lot most of the students had already left. So I sat in my truck and collected myself before driving home.

Once home I allowed myself to wallow over Edward for a little while. I changed into comfortable cut-off sweats and an oversized t-shirt and laid on the couch. The TV was on, but I wasn't paying attention. I kept going over both conversations in my mind. I couldn't believe he'd say something so hurtful to me. I was really surprised; it was so out of character.

Then I thought about Mike, I felt kind of badly about accepting his invitation out of anger towards Edward. That wasn't very nice of me. I made a promise to myself that I would have a talk with him and let him know that I wanted to go with him as friends only. If he was interested in anything more than that he should find someone else to ask.

I straightened up a bit and realized it was nice enough outside to open some windows and let some air in. Once I had a nice cross breeze going, I started dinner for me and Charlie. I wasn't feeling creative, so I went with simple spaghetti. Charlie got home earlier than usual so that he could get some spring yard work done. Dinner was nearly ready when I heard Charlie talking to someone out front.

I went and peeked out the front window and was shocked to see a silver Volvo in the driveway. Charlie and Edward were chatting about baseball and slowly walking up the front walk. I gasped then looked down at my now sauce-splattered T-shirt and sweats.

_Shit Shit Shit!_

I sprinted upstairs to my bedroom and was half-way changed back into my shorts from earlier when I heard them come in the front door.

Charlie yelled, "Bells, there's someone here to see you."

"Okay, I'll be right down."

I was glad Edward hadn't seen me peek out the window; now I could control my entrance.

When I got to the top of the steps I saw Charlie was waiting at the bottom. "How long until dinner?"

He either didn't notice or didn't mention that I'd changed clothes. "Um, maybe ten minutes."

Charlie glanced towards the front door where Edward was standing, still out of sight. "If there's enough, maybe you want to invite your friend to stay."

I realized he was thinking about our conversation from last night, trying to be helpful. "Maybe. I'll see how much there is."

I walked into the living room and looked at Edward with a neutral expression. "Hi Edward."

Charlie looked back and forth between me and Edward, sensing some tension. "Well, I'll be outside, just yell when it's ready."

I nodded and Charlie slipped back out the front door with a quick nod to Edward, who was standing there with his hands in his pockets.

I turned and walked back into the kitchen without a word to Edward. I checked the water, stirred the sauce and got out the pasta. Without much else to do at the moment I finally faced Edward. I glared at him and didn't speak.

_I'll be damned if I'm going to talk first. In fact, I'm not going to say anything if I don't have to._

He had his hands in his pockets and kept glancing awkwardly between me and the floor.

He finally cleared his throat, "So I think I owe you an apology."

My expression didn't change.

"I don't have the right to try and tell you who you can or should go out with. I didn't mean to be presumptuous like that."

I arched one eyebrow.

"And I _really _didn't mean that I felt badly for Mike because he had to go with you. I felt bad because I think you agreed to go with him just because you were mad at me. And, I don't think that's fair to Mike, so I came here to try to talk you into maybe _not_ going with Mike, hopefully before he tells everyone at school tomorrow."

"Why?"

Edward gulped and looked at the floor.

_Hold up. Is he actually nervous?_

"Well, I do think he's an ass sometimes."

I huffed, but Edward held up his hand to stop me and then closed his eyes while he finished talking.

"I mean, I'd like it if you went with me, instead of Mike. I wanted to ask you, but then I heard you told Maggie that you hated dancing, so I didn't. But if you'd like to go to the dance, then I'm hoping you'd like to go with me, and not him, and definitely not as a pity date. But if you don't actually want to go to the dance, we could do something else too." He opened his eyes and smiled at me. "But trust me, my something else will be a whole lot more honorable than Mike's something else."

_Hallelujah!!_

"Okay."

He smiled back. "Okay, you won't go with Mike?"

I nodded. "Okay."

He grinned. "Okay."

Then I was confused; I didn't know what I'd just agreed to. Were we going to the dance, or not?

Charlie chose that precise moment to pop his head back in the door. "Do I have time to take a load of sticks out to Billy for the bonfire this weekend? It's supposed to rain tomorrow and I'd like to get it in his shed so it can stay dry."

"Yeah, go ahead. I can hold it a little while. Edward, did you want to stay?"

"Sure, but can I use your phone to call home?"

I showed him where the phone was behind him and he called his house.

"Hey Em, is mom around? Thanks …Hey Mom, is it alright if I eat at a friend's place tonight…Chief Swan's…No, not the Chief, his daughter Bella, remember, from the accident…thanks…yeah, I will, but I gotta go her other line is beeping…okay, bye."

Edward looked at me, pointing at the phone and back to his chest, asking if he should answer it.

I nodded and he clicked the receiver, "Swan residence?"

"Um, yeah, she's right here, hold on…Huh? Oh, yeah, hey Newton… I pissed off Bella today and stopped on my way home to apologize…Hang on, she's right here."

_Shit. I forgot he was supposed to call._

Edward handed me the phone with a 'yikes' look on his face.

"Hello?"

"Hey Bella, it's Mike. What's Masen doing there?"

"We got into an argument today after school and he just realized he was wrong and came to apologize." I winked at Edward, who smirked and shook his head slowly.

"Oh. What about?"

"Nothing important, don't worry about it. But listen, I'm glad you called. Turns out that I was wrong, I do have a conflict and won't be able to go to the dance with you after all."

"Oh. That sucks."

"I'm sorry for all the back and forth on it."

"Are you going to go with Cullen?"

"No, I'm not going to the dance at all. I'm going to do something else." I looked at Edward, he smiled and nodded.

"Oh. Okay, well, I guess I'll let you go then. See you tomorrow."

"Okay, See ya, Mike, and again, sorry about all the mix-ups."

"That's okay, there's still time, I was thinking about asking Jessica anyway. I'll see ya later, okay?"

I snorted. "Okay, good idea. See ya."

I hung up and looked at Edward, who was leaning against the counter with his arms crossed. I wiped my brow and said, "phew".

We made small talk about a variety of topics while I finished up dinner. Charlie came home soon enough and the three of us ate together. Charlie liked Edward, for obvious reasons stemming from his saving my life a few weeks back. It didn't hurt that he was polite and charming.

_**PRESENT TIME**_

"Way to go Bella! I'm impressed. I'd always imagined you in High School as sort of spineless." Rosalie was grinning at me.

I shrugged. "It became a bit of a pattern for Edward. He has a hard time making up his own mind to do something without an outside influence. Sometimes that's a good thing, sometimes it's not."

Alice nodded. "So you went to the dance. What did you wear?"

"Didn't you listen? I said we didn't go to the dance."

Alice frowned, "Why not?"

I smiled. "Edward had something better in mind."

Alice clapped her hands and started bouncing. "You had sex!"

"Alice, I was a sixteen year-old virgin! Seriously?"

"What? This is Edward we're talking about. Are you telling me you didn't want to?"

"Well, no, not _exactly_." I shrugged and blushed a little bit. _Oh my God! I can't believe I'm still blushing over this!_

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**_Now please, review, if nothing else, I'd like to thank you for for reading. If you are following the update alerts, just let me know you're still with me. But if you have something you'd like to share, or offer, I'd love to hear it._**

**_Thanks for reading!_**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: As always, thanks to my wonderful beta -– TwirlGrrl**

**Stephenie Meyer = Twilight**

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**Chapter 8**

_"Didn't you listen? I said we didn't go to the dance."_

_Alice frowned, "Why not?" _

_I smiled. "Edward had something better in mind." _

_Alice clapped her hands and started bouncing. "You had sex!" _

_"Alice, I was a sixteen year-old virgin! Seriously?" _

_"What? This is Edward we're talking about. Are you telling me you didn't want to?" _

_"Well, no, not exactly." I shrugged and blushed a little bit. Oh my God! I can't believe I'm still blushing over this!_

"Well, no we didn't have sex, but it was really great. It was really romantic, but actually I don't know if you would call it a first date, because we all of a sudden were spending a lot of time together."

Alice nodded. "First love, right, so you were like an instant couple?"

I shook my head. "No, not at all. We didn't tell anyone at all. It just sort of happened that way – like the stars aligned just so that Edward and I were suddenly thrown together all the time."

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****FLASHBACK – MARCH 1992 – THE NEXT MORNING**

That night I'd been so excited about the non-dance date with Edward, and how well dinner had gone with Charlie, that I couldn't possibly keep my mind on the Geometry quiz I was trying to study for. The next day we had the last quiz before finals and I needed to do well, but I kept finding myself staring off into space with a goofy smile on my face. I finally gave up, closed the books and climbed into bed. I reset my alarm clock so that I could get to school a little early and get some studying done before homeroom. I hated the stress it caused, but I usually focused better under pressure anyway.

The next morning I dressed quickly and ate my breakfast. The unseasonably warm weather had passed us by, and now I was back to my standard jeans and t-shirt with limited options for the top layer. I went with a zip-up sweater that I could take off when it got warmer later in the day. When I climbed out of the truck the next morning, his Volvo was already there, front row like always.

Dr. and Mrs. Cullen made Edward drive Emmett to his detention every morning. It was their way of saddling him with the consequences along with Emmett, since Edward had been part of the ridiculous bet that ended with the fizzy fish. Edward was required to be on school grounds whenever Emmett was in detention, but he could spend the time as he saw fit, which usually meant an early morning workout or reading in the library.

That's why I didn't notice him sitting in the driver's seat that morning. When he called, "Hey Bella" out the window I jumped and yelped like I'd been stuck with a hot poker. He laughed at my reaction. "Maybe you should cut back on the coffee."

"Oh, my God, you scared the hell out of me." I panted while I waited for my heart rate to slow again.

"I noticed. Wanna sit for a while?" He jerked his head towards the passenger seat.

_Gah. Geometry or Edward? Geometry or Edward. Definitely Edward. _

I nodded and walked around to climb in the passenger side.

I closed the door and smiled at him. "What are you doing out here?"

"Listening to a CD."

I listened to the silence in the car and went for sarcasm, nodding "It's pretty good, who is it?"

He scowled at my sad attempt at humor and reached out to hit a button on the stereo with a mildly sheepish look on his face. It only took a few notes for me to recognize it. I smiled and nodded a little, "Clare de Lune is great."

The sheepish look on his face quickly turned into my favorite lopsided smile. His eyebrows arched a bit with the surprised look on his face. "You know Debussy?"

I wobbled my head back and forth. "My mom used to play some classical, depending on her moods. I only know a few of my favorites."

He nodded. "So what are you doing here so early this morning?"

I wrinkled my nose. "I have a geometry quiz that I need to study for."

He nodded, "What's it on?"

I wrinkled my nose and grumbled, "Proofs".

"Not a fan of proofs, huh?"

I rolled my eyes. "Not at all. Geometry has been a breeze up to this point, but I can't seem to wrap my head around them. If I can just do well on this quiz, I'll have an A going into finals, and I won't have to take it."

"Usually people who sail through geometry, get hung up on proofs. It's backwards thinking, especially if you process things visually."

I smiled, glad he understood me and didn't make me feel stupid. "That's me to a T. Did you already take it?"

"Yeah, I took it last year, but I still remember a few tricks, if you want some help."

"Sure, I could use all the help I can get." I reached into my bag and pulled out my books.

He showed me a couple of tricks and a different approach, and by the time the warning bell rang thirty minutes later, he had me completely turned around and whipping through them with ease.

We climbed out of the car and headed into the school. We had just come around the corner to the hallway where my locker was when Mike passed us. Edward tried to be friendly, "How ya doing Newton?"

But Mike wasn't having it. He shot me a quick smile and then glared at Edward until we'd passed.

Edward rolled his eyes. "So, we should probably talk about that."

"What, Mike?"

"Yeah. You know I think he's an ass, right?"

"You've made that pretty clear."

"But he's still a teammate, and one could argue that I've violated the bro code by talking you into canceling on him."

I giggled "The bro code? You've got to be kidding me. There's an actual code? Like do you all stand in a circle, swear to be brothers for life, and sing 'Kumbaya'?" The giggles overtook me as I enjoyed my over-the-top humor.

He arched an eyebrow at me and waited patiently while the giggles persisted for an unreasonable length of time. I don't know if it was my lack of sleep, nerves, or the twinkle in his eye as he stood there with that crooked smile on his face, but something pushed me over the edge until the giggles escalated to a point of ridiculousness.

I gasped for air and tried to reel it in. "I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me."

Emmett walked up and stood next to Edward. He was grinning at me as I was still trying to wind down the giggles. "Do I get to hear the joke too?"

Edward shook his head at him. "We were talking about the team and I mentioned the bro code. Apparently Bella thinks the bro code is some seriously funny shit."

Emmett scowled at me. "Swan, the bro code is no joke; it's an essential element to the team dynamic. A breakdown in the team dynamic can substantially undermine the team's ability to function as a unit. A solid team is comprised of more than just physical aptitude; being emotionally cohesive is equally important. A team must be able to anticipate and interpret one another. A violation of the bro code can cause tension and friction, which would upset the balance of the team and undermine that entire foundation."

I was stunned by Emmett's response. His over-use of fifty-cent words and the stern tone was in direct conflict with what I was so accustomed to seeing in Emmett and my own silly mood. I bit my lips together and tried hard to control myself. But my body betrayed me and my chest started quaking with silent sobs of laughter. I glanced at Edward for help, but his face was pure amusement at my inability to control the giggles. His grin was my unraveling.

I started shaking violently with belly laughter and tears began streaming down my cheeks. I guffawed and coughed and eventually ran out of air, but was still laughing so hard that when I tried to inhale a very loud and unfeminine snort burst forth.

My snort pushed Edward over the edge and he burst out laughing with me. When Maggie joined us she stood there in confusion looking between me and Edward, both overcome with fits of laughter. And then at Emmett, who was still scowling at both of us clearly offended by our lack of gravity with regard to the bro code and it's impact on the team dynamic. He muttered something to himself, shaking his head and stomped off.

Edward got himself under control first. "Seriously Swan; the coffee, you really need to cut back."

I shook my head, slowly calming. "I don't drink coffee; I think I just need to get more sleep."

"Whatever, I gotta jet. I'll see you in Lit." He gave my arm a squeeze goodbye, leaving a tingling feeling and turned down the hallway.

Maggie let me enjoy the moment watching Edward walking away. We'd been so busy studying and laughing that I'd never noticed what he was wearing. He was casual in khakis, a blue and green plaid button down left open with the sleeves rolled up, a white t-shirt, and his usual boots. He moved with agility and grace. I noticed his muscular shoulders and thought about running my hand over them. Like he was reading my mind, he shrugged out of the shirt and revealed the white t-shirt underneath. Without the button down I could see how his pants hung off his rear. Ugh, I was definitely into asses.

_Oh, who am I kidding? I'm into all things Edward. _

Maggie finally cleared her throat next to me, breaking me from my reverie. "So Bella, what's new?

She'd sounded so casual, but when I turned to look at her, her body language spoke volumes of another story. She was bouncing on the balls of her feet; with eyes that were big and shining with excitement, and she was pinching her lips together to contain a huge grin.

I was startled, "What?"

She grinned at me. "Don't give me _what_. I saw you in his car this morning, and now this. You tell me _what. _He asked you to the dance didn't he?"

Maggie and I had first period together so we started walking that direction. "Yes and no."

"Yes and no?"

"Well actually, Mike asked me first, like you thought."

"So you said no?"

"He did it yesterday in Bio right in front of Edward, and Edward got up and walked away, but Mike just talked about baseball until he came back so that I had to answer in front of him. So, I just said I would have to think about it, which I guess, got Edward's attention because he passed me a note during class and told me not to go with Mike."

"Seriously?" Maggie squealed.

I brought Maggie all up to speed on the current state of affairs with Mike and Edward. She oohed and aahhed and growled when I told her what Edward said about feeling badly for Mike. By the end she was bouncing and grinning like the Cheshire cat. She was excited for me, but kind of disappointed that we weren't going to the dance after all. I could tell she had hoped that if I was going with Edward, that maybe she would go with Emmett and we could double.

"You sure you won't go to the dance?"

"Are you kidding me? I have a date with Edward Masen! And I won't have to wear heels, or a dress, or hopefully dance. The chances that I won't trip over my own two feet in front of him drop considerably if I don't have to do any of that. And I still get to go out with Edward Masen! Hell no I'm not going to the dance!"

Maggie scowled at me, she likes dancing. "You know you're not normal, right."

I grinned "I have a date with Edward Masen; ask me if I care." We were sitting in home room and the bell had just rung. "Hey, we need to talk more after class, because I don't think Edward wants anyone to know."

Maggie crinkled her nose at me and frowned. "First off, stop using his first and last name. It's almost as weird as talking in the third person. Secondly, what do you mean he doesn't want anyone to know? What's _that_ all about?

"No, not like he's embarrassed or something, I don't think. I think he's worried about Mike's feelings."

Maggie scoffed. "Whaaat? Since when? Seriously Bella, that's sketchy."

We were forced to cut it short after a stern throat clearing from the front of the room. Maggie had a good point, it was kind of sketchy. I hadn't let Edward finish with his explanation of the bro code, but I was sure he was trying to tell me that he didn't want Mike to know about our date yet. I started to wonder if that stupid bro code was the real reason. He has always made it publicly known that he didn't care for Mike, so why would he now. As I kicked it around and rolled it through all of my paranoid neurosis, I decided to play it out. I wouldn't tell anyone and I would just wait and see if he did.

Maggie agreed that it was a good plan, and would keep it to herself too. I beat Edward to American Lit, when he arrived he flashed me a crooked smile and my heart skipped a beat. We were wrapping up literature from the depression era. For obvious reasons, my mood was not fitting the subject at hand. It was fortunate that I wasn't called on.

At lunchtime I hustled my way to the cafeteria and through the line in time to be the first person to our table. I sat at the middle of the table leaving space all around me so, hopefully I could gain some insight in Edward's choice of seating. If he sat near me, it was a good sign, if not, well then…it was sketchy.

Maggie arrived first, and she sat on my left. Then Jessica and Lauren got there so they sat across from us. Jessica immediately set into her story about Mike calling last night and asking her to the dance. She, of course, had known for weeks that he was going to ask her, because she always catches him checking her out.

Maggie kicked me under the table; I noticed her concealing a smirk out of the corner of my eye. She got it under control in time to fake enthusiasm. "So what did you say?"

Lauren spoke for Jessica. "Of course she didn't tell him yes yet, Edward and Emmett don't have dates yet. They'll probably ask us so we can double."

Maggie stifled a laugh with a cough. "How do you know they don't have dates yet?"

Lauren rolled her eyes. "Well, duh, if they had asked you, wouldn't you have mentioned it? No one has said anything, so obviously, they haven't yet."

I kept my mouth shut; this was the perfect opportunity to flush out the sketchiness.

Maggie saw the opportunity too. "Jess, you can't leave Mike hanging. Shouldn't you ask one of them before Mike decides to move on."

Jess and Lauren looked at each other. Lauren nodded at her. "We should. They are probably just too nervous to ask us."

Edward and Emmett were approaching the table and Mike and Tyler were still up in line. Maggie coughed a heads up to Jess and Lauren.

Edward sat down next to me; my heart skipped another beat and my stomach did a somersault. I smiled at him, but took a bite of lunch so I wouldn't have to talk.

"So Bella, did you pick your authors?"

"Hmm? Authors for what?"

He looked at me quizzically. "American lit – our final papers?"

"Oh, um, I sort of spaced at the end. What's the assignment?"

He smirked. "We each pick three authors that we've studied this semester. Mr. Harris will review each of our selections and then assign each of us a partner to work with based on our selected authors. Then we will each be assigned one of our three authors to write a paper about and the teams will present their papers, along with a compare and contrast oral presentation for our finals."

I shook my head. "No, I missed that whole thing."

"I thought maybe, I looked back at you and you looked like you were doodling in your notebook. What were you doing?"

I'm sure my face flamed a bright red.

_Isabella Masen; Mrs. Isabella Masen; Dr. and Mrs. Edward Masen._

"Just practicing some of the proofs you showed me. Your suggestions helped a lot."

His eyes tightened just a bit, but he nodded slowly "Uh huh."

_God I suck at lying. Mental note: destroy that page._

"Well I thought if we compared notes and picked authors from the same era, Hughes might take mercy on the two sophomores in the class and team us together."

"Oh! Good idea. I'll jot down some ideas and we can compare notes on it later."

Lauren took this opportunity to change the subject. "I wish they wouldn't pile on all this work at the end of the year. I mean the End of Year Dance is next weekend, it's not like we really want to be bogged down with homework right now."

Emmett smirked, "Lauren I don't think they consider our social calendars when they put together the syllabus, but you are on student council, maybe you should make it an issue."

It was a running joke between Emmett, Edward, Maggie and me about Lauren being on student council. She wasn't really the smartest chip off the block, but high school student council, at least in Forks, was more about popularity than intelligence. Lauren flaunted her title of Sophomore class representative.

Lauren considered Emmett's snide remark as interested and she leaned around Jessica to look at Edward and him, "Speaking of the dance, do you guys have dates yet?"

I kept my eyes on Emmett, who noticeably gulped, but tried to be casual when he shook his head and said "Nope." He didn't look at her; instead he suddenly became very interested in his lunch. I noticed peripherally that Edward did the same thing and didn't say anything.

Lauren didn't give up easily. "What about you Edward?"

He shook his head, "Uh-uh, I'm not going to the dance." Then he quickly glanced at me with an almost neutral expression, but I noticed the very edges of his lips twist upwards in a tiny smile.

Lauren frowned. "Why not?"

Edward shrugged. "Just have something better to do."

"What?"

He shrugged again. "Just something else I'd rather do with my time."

"What would be more important than the End of Year Dance?"

_Damn, she was pushy._

Edward had lost his patience and he looked right at her this time. "None of your fucking business Lauren, if I wanted you to know I'd tell you."

Her eyes got big and she visibly backed away. "Okay, I'm sorry, I just thought maybe you and Emmett would want to go with me and –"

Maggie started coughing and looked up to where Mike and Tyler were approaching our table now. Jessica took the cue and kicked Lauren.

I looked at Emmett who was shoveling food in his mouth and kept looking at Edward. He had a strange look in his eyes, almost fear. I noticed a silent exchange going on between the two of them. I looked at Edward and he was shaking his head almost imperceptibly. I watched Lauren as she stood up from her seat and Mike sat in her place and started to talk to Jessica quietly. Lauren came around to sit on the other side of Emmett and his eyes grew wider as he glared at Edward. Edward was squeezing his lips together like he was stifling a laugh.

Suddenly Emmett turned his head sharply to look past me at Maggie, who was either actually, or pretending to be oblivious of the silent exchange going on next to me. He nearly shouted at her. "Hey Mags! You wanna go to the dance with me next weekend?"

Everyone nearby stopped talking as Maggie's head snapped up in surprise. "Um, okay?"

Emmett grinned at her. "Cool."

Lauren shot a death glare at Maggie before she stomped out of the cafeteria. A minute or two later I overheard Jessica firming up her plans with Mike. Maggie played pretty cool through the whole thing, but I think I could feel her vibrating in her chair next to me.

_**____________________________________________________________________________**_

_**PRESENT TIME**_

Rosalie laughed. "So was Emmett afraid of Lauren or what?"

I shrugged, remembering it. "Maybe, Maggie and he got along really well. I always thought they would have made a cute couple, and they almost did after the dance, but it didn't work out."

Alice cocked her head, "Why not, what happened?"

"We'll come back to that. Can I finish telling you about my first date with Edward?"

"Yeah, go on."

_**____________________________________________________________________________**_

_**FLASHBACK – MARCH 1992**_

In Biology we were assigned our leaf project. We needed to find and identify 24 different types of trees by their leaves and then write up a scientific description of each tree. We could split them up and find 12 each, but if he found it, then I had to write up the scientific classifications for them. We decided to do it together. The next day we were successfully assigned to work together in American Lit also.

So, each day for the next two weeks, he would go to baseball practice, and then come to my house, where he would eat with me and Charlie, and then we'd work on our projects for a while. Exceptions to that routine were when he had a game on Friday, and Monday of the following week, then Maggie and I went to watch them play. We'd been spending a lot of time together, which I appreciated, but it was still nagging at me that he didn't want to tell anyone about our plans.

I was actually a little envious of Maggie when we went dress shopping, and I despise dress shopping. But everyone knew that she was going with Emmett to the dance. It was, quite frankly, the talk of our class. I was so excited about my date with Edward that I wanted to burst at the seams. But, his need to keep it a secret felt kind of sketchy, to quote Maggie.

Sunday afternoon Edward came over to work on our outlines for the American Lit papers. We were working on a comparison and contrast of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau, and their works 'Nature' and 'Walden'. It was a fairly straight-forward comparison that had been done numerous times before. The concepts were interesting and spurred a lot of conversation about our home towns. Edward grew up in L.A. and I was from Phoenix so we spent quite a bit of time comparing the city to life in Forks. He understood the culture shock I'd been experiencing, but it was interesting that he felt the pace of Forks suited him a little better than L.A. I'd been feeling the same way as I settled into the small town. We talked about missing the sun and heat from home. He had been living here for a few more years, so he'd had more time to adjust to the change in climate.

"You just haven't had time to explore and appreciate your surroundings. I don't think I'd choose to move back to L.A. anymore. I love it here."

"Really? I miss the sun."

He smiled at me. "Well, then you need to find it. I just got a really good idea, a way to kill two birds with one stone. I know what we should do this weekend, when we don't go to the dance."

"What's that?"

He thought for a minute, chewing on the inside of his cheek, it was a nervous habit that I'd noticed. With his chiseled features, it really outlined his jaw line and cheekbones. My thoughts would stall whenever I caught him doing it. I suddenly had this urge to reach out and touch his face, preferably with my lips. Edward leaned on his fist, looking at me. "Does Charlie like me?"

The sudden mention of Charlie interrupted my less than wholesome train of thought. It was a jarring shift and it threw me. I blinked once and said, "Uh, yeah, of course, he's usually pretty fond of people that save his daughter from certain death. Then I told him that you first came here last week to talk me out of going to the dance with Mike because he doesn't treat girls very nicely and you got some brownie points."

"So he knows about our non-dance date?"

"Mhmm"

"Good. Do you think he'd let you spend a whole day with me? To go on a little road trip?"

I thought about it for a minute. "I honestly don't know. I've never asked anything like that. I guess I could ask him. Do you want me to? Where are we going?"

Edward shook his head and squinted at the wood grain laminate on the dining room table top and did that thing with his cheek again. "No, I think I'll ask him myself, if that's alright with you. I think I'd rather surprise you."

Then he stopped for a second and looked back at me with a look of concern and put his hand over my own, causing another jolt of electricity to tingle through my hand. "I'm sorry, Bella, I shouldn't assume, would you mind spending the whole day with me this weekend?"

I felt my heart rate accelerate and grinned at his chivalry. "Sure, of course I would. But you are going to have to give me a few hints about what we're doing."

"I will; if Charlie agrees, you'll need to be prepared for it. I'm going to go talk to Charlie. I'll be right back." Then he stopped and looked back at me. "Why don't you go find that CD you wanted me to listen to."

"Radiohead?"

"Yeah. What was that song again?"

";Creep'." He smirked, apparently the name amused him.

I ran upstairs and dug it out while he went to talk to Charlie. I could hear them talking quietly when I was coming back downstairs.

Charlie was apparently okay with the whole idea. "No, I think it's a good idea. But you sure she isn't just homesick?"

"I don't think so, she just said she missed the sun, so I thought…"

"Yeah, sure, and you think you'll find everything you need?"

"Probably, but if not, we would still have Sunday and the following weekend to finish it. We'll have plenty of time. I'd just like to show her some of the finer points of living here."

"I think that's a great idea. From me it would be just old Dad trying to win her over. When do you think you'll leave?"

"Well, I'd want to have as much daylight as possible, so probably around 7:00. I'd like to take her to dinner on our way back, if that's okay with you. Since everyone else will be at the dance, maybe we could go to a movie or something afterwards."

"That's fine. You're welcome to watch one back here too, if you guys are tired, but if not, just have her home by ten."

_What? 10:00? Is he serious?_

I spoke up then. "Dad, really? Ten? My curfew is usually midnight."

Edward's head jerked up at me, and his brow furrowed. "You were eavesdropping!"

"Well, not really, I don't know where you're taking me. But seriously, Dad, ten?"

Edward shook his head. "Bella, it's fine, I don't know how much you heard, but I want to leave early in the morning. We'll be exhausted."

I shot Edward a look that said, "Stop defending him." But he shot it right back at me.

Charlie started laughing. "Fine Bella, eleven, but I bet he has you back by ten."

I grinned at Edward and he rolled his eyes at me. "I gotta get going, I've missed so many dinners lately, Esme's getting a complex about her cooking and Sunday dinners are sort of a command performance around our house. Plus I've got a quiz in French tomorrow and I need to study."

"Ick – foreign languages, I suck at them. Be glad I'm taking Spanish or you'd be helping me with that too. Oh! By the way! I totally aced the quiz on proofs, thanks to you."

"Glad I could help. You would have figured it out. Once you get them, they just click."

We cleaned up our homework for the night and I walked him out to his car. Every night when he was leaving I would get nervous, wondering if he was going to kiss me goodnight. But so far, it was always the same, just a gentle squeeze on my bicep goodbye.

"So, I'll see you in the morning then?"

"Of course, I'll be there bright and early with Emmett."

"Okay. Thanks again for helping me with the proofs."

_Ramble much? God Bella, if you don't know what to say, then don't talk._

"Uh-huh. Listen, you know that I'm not keeping our non-dance date a secret because I don't want people to know, right?"

_Holy crap! Uh, No._

"Um, I don't know. I guess I don't really get it. But I'm okay with people not knowing my business." I shrugged at the end, hoping to come off as casual.

"I tried to tell you about the bro code," He held up a hand to stop my giggles again. "What I did, coming here to talk you out of going out with Mike, It would be frowned upon by the guys on the team. And, I'm sure you know that a lot of guys are interested in you, so it wouldn't go unnoticed. Our dating, that is." He looked to the ground, and it looked like his cheeks colored a bit with the last part. "Since the year is almost over, I kind of thought that maybe we could just do our thing, and maybe not have it be under a microscope."

"Edward, a lot of guys aren't interested in me. Mike is the only one that asked me to the dance."

He gaped at me for a minute. "Bella, _a lot _of guys _are _interested in you. But Mike told everyone that you weren't going because you were going to be out of town. According to him, you told him that you wanted to go with him and you were crushed that you had to cancel your date; he started to say that you were crying on the phone, but then backpedaled when he remembered that I was there, standing in your kitchen."

"Oh God! What an ass!"

"What did I tell you?"

"Ugh!"

"So, you're okay with not doing this under a microscope? Because if you want to tell people, I don't care, I'll deal with the Mike thing and the team. But you know that there will be a lot of talking about us."

I remembered his reaction to everyone talking about the accident and waved my hand at him dismissing it all. "No, it's fine, you're right, there's only three weeks left to the year anyway. It'll be kind of fun to have our own little secret." I tossed him a wink.

_Oh God! I'm so lame … I can't believe I just winked at him! Can I just run back inside now and forget that happened?_

But apparently, not so lame, because Edward smiled a big, sexy, crooked, smile at me and reached up and brushed his fingers from my cheekbone, down the side of my cheek, and then down my neck. He left his hand there on the side of my neck and said, "Okay then - our little secret." Then he leaned down and kissed my cheek.

I'm sure I stood there with a stupid look on my face as he flashed a quick wink back at me and then climbed in his car.

"See you tomorrow Bella."

"See ya."

The rest of the week flew by with the same routine, a game on Monday, then studying at my house on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, then another game on Friday. Edward and I kept our time together on the down low, with the exception of Maggie and Emmett, who knew about our date. Those that did ask, which happened a surprising number of times, I just told them about our Bio and Lit projects. Maggie kept trying to talk both of us into going to the dance, but neither of us wanted to, and Emmett was worried that the Mike conflict would upset the end of their season, so he supported the bro code.

Saturday morning I awoke at six o'clock sharp. In fact, I might have been awake before the alarm went off. I showered quickly, though taking the time to shave thoroughly because, well, you never know. Edward had told me to wear layers, and jeans. He said it might be chilly, but I should be able to remove layers, because it could be warm in the afternoon. So I picked out my favorite jeans and tank top, a flannel of Charlie's and a fleece pull-over. I was just finishing breakfast when Edward knocked on the door. Charlie was already gone fishing with one of his buddies.

I opened the door and gasped at the handsomeness that was Edward. He could have stepped straight from the pages of an Eddie Bauer catalog. He wore dark blue jeans, boots, a flannel button down and a jacket with several pockets on it. His hair was still damp from a shower and the morning air was chilly for late May and I could see his breath when he said . "Hey."

He was holding a box in his hands. "Here, I brought you something."

"Thanks." I took the box and opened it. I could have guessed a hundred different things that might be in that box, but I never would have guessed a pair of brown hiking boots. I looked at Edward, confused. "Um, thanks? What size are they?"

He smirked at me, "Seven; Charlie checked your shoes. Try them on before we go. If they don't fit we need to exchange them."

"We're going hiking? Where?"

"Yeah, but we'll drive first; and you'll see. Come on try them on."

"Okay, okay!" He was clearly excited, and I wanted to be too, but I was definitely feeling some trepidation at the idea of hiking. I'm so damn clumsy I couldn't imagine this going well. But I kicked off my gym shoes and tried on the boots. "They fit perfectly! Wow, these are really comfortable, where did you get them?"

Now Edward chuckled. "At Newton's Outfitters; I made sure Mike wasn't working."

"How much were they? I'll pay you back."

He just shook his head at me and frowned. "They're a gift Bella. You're not paying me back."

"Edward, you can't buy me new boots. Don't be ridiculous."

"You don't be ridiculous, think of them like the corsage I would have gotten you if we were going to the dance." Then he grinned at me and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah, but they are brown, practical, and I would guess cost ten times more. Not the same thing at all."

"I could pin a flower to them if that would make you feel better." He grinned at me.

I squinted at his smart ass response while I finished lacing up the boots. "Are we going to hike far? Maybe we should pack a lunch."

"Already taken care of it. Do you need anything else? You should be warm enough. It will warm up quite a bit by the time we get there."

"Get where? How far are we going?"

"It's a couple of hours away, don't worry, Charlie knows where we're going."

"Okay, then, let's hit the road."

Edward headed out to the 101 and the drove out through the Olympic National Forest. The weather was beautiful and remarkably dry. He had a mixed CD that he played in the car and we talked about the music, and school, and whatever came to mind. Conversation always flowed easily with Edward.

The road was long, winding and curvy. I had to stop looking down, because the road at times was so close to the edge of the cliff it made me want to scream out. At one point we came around a curve and drove right into a wall of fog. He slowed the car, but it wasn't as thick as I thought, and quickly we were through it. After a few minutes I realized that he had just driven through the clouds!

Eventually he pulled the car off the road and came around to open my door. When I exited the car, what I saw before me took my breath away. It was chilly outside, but the sun was shining and the view was amazing. We could see the tops of the snow-covered mountain range. Every color in the rainbow was present and accounted for, in shades that I'd never seen and with vibrancy that I'd never imagined. The snowy tops were the brightest white, the mountains varying shades of gray and brown, the forest below boasted the brightest of greens and the sky was the richest shade of blue. Flowers of every color imaginable were scattered over the grounds nearby.

I looked at Edward and he smiled at me. "Pretty amazing, huh?"

"Wow, I mean, wow! What is this place?" It was clearly a well established place; there was a welcome center and picnic benches.

"This is Hurricane Ridge, but we're hiking from here."

He grabbed my hand and started pulling me towards some trails. "Wait, where are we going?"

"I want to show you my favorite place."

Edward had strapped on a backpack while I was taking in the view and he led the way down a well established trail. We hiked and talked for about an hour. There must be something in the air here, because my blood pumped faster, my heart pounded, I could breathe deeper. I felt like I was high on some kind of drug. It was exhilarating and I was drinking it in. Edward finally paused for a few minutes and we sat down on a fallen log for a rest. He took off the backpack and pulled out a couple of bottles of water.

"Want a drink?"

"Yeah, thanks."

We sat in quiet for a while. Edward reached over and took my hand. I looked at him and was surprised by what I saw there. His ears and the tip of his nose were red; his cheeks were flushed. The air was colder in the shade of the trees where we were walking. But his eyes, were so open, and clear, and happy. I could see something here that I'd never noticed before. Edward felt the same way I did - alive.

He gave my hand a squeeze. "You ready?"

"Yep, is it much further?"

"No, but it's steeper. We have to climb up there."

I followed where Edward was pointing up a pretty steep hillside. It wasn't quite as steep as a cliff side, but it was close enough to intimidate me. "Are you kidding me, have you not been watching me today? I've been tripping on a paved trail. I can't climb that."

"It looks worse than it is. I'll help you; trust me, it won't be bad."

We started up the steep slope. It looked like the ground had washed away at one point. There were a lot of exposed tree roots to use as steps. When it got difficult Edward reached back and took my hand, pulling me up each step. He never let go of me, and a part of me wished we'd never reach the top.

As the ground started to level out, I was able to get my first glimpse of the meadow at the top of the hill. I gasped at it's beauty. We were still standing in the shadows of the forest, but beyond the shadows was a beautiful meadow full of purple wildflowers. Along the backside of the meadow it ran over the edge of a cliff. There was a small stand of pines just before the hillside dropped off leaving nothing but a backdrop of the mountaintops and the clouds below.

The sun was shining brightly beyond the trees and as I walked out into the bright sunlight I let go of Edward's hand to shield my eyes from the sun's glare. From the meadow you were able to look out over the clouds to the tops of the mountains surrounding the Olympic National Forest. I could almost see 360 degrees around me.

I don't know how many minutes I stood in the meadow and just took it all in. I was speechless at the beauty surrounding me. I hadn't noticed Edward approaching me, but suddenly I felt his hands on my upper arms. His touch startled me and I jumped a bit.

"Sorry, I just had to hear what you were thinking." He wrapped his arms around me and held both of my hands in his.

"I'm thinking…that this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." We stood there for several minutes, taking it in. I could feel his chest moving with each breath as I leaned back against him. He just held me there and let it all wash over me.

I finally turned to face Edward to thank him for bringing me here. But the look in his eyes stopped me. His eyes were shining. "Yeah, it's beautiful alright." He didn't mean the view.

Then he kissed me. And Edward's kiss made me forget everything else. I forgot where we were standing, the mountains, the sky, the sun, and the flowers. All that I knew was Edward's lips on mine. He kissed me chastely at first; just the soft touch of his lips brushing against mine. I closed my eyes instinctively . then leaned into him. His lips pressed firmly against mine; his tongue tracing ever so softly over my lower lip.

My hands ran up over his chest to his neck. I reached behind his neck and twisted my hands into his hair. Soon we were both breathing together; tongues twisting around one another. I'd never been kissed like Edward kissed me there in that meadow. We shared the same breath and moved against one another. His arms wrapped around my waist and under my fleece pullover. After several minutes we were gasping, pulling and tugging on one another.

Finally Edward must have realized we were steamrolling down a path at breakneck speeds because he slowed the frantic pace of our kisses before placing one last soft kiss on my lips and then leaning his forehead against mine.

"Bella?" He breathed my name.

"Edward?"

"I brought some lunch and a blanket. Would you like to sit and relax for a bit."

I nodded. "Yeah, let's stay here for a while."

_**PRESENT TIME**_

"Edward's kiss stopped my entire universe. It was like the world had blown up around me and I failed to notice. He probably could have gotten anything he wanted from me after that one kiss. That's how I've always been with him. I just totally lose control, but Edward didn't. He always set the pace with us, and his pace was always more controlled than mine."

Rosalie and Alice were both quiet. I wondered what they were thinking.

"I can't remember other kisses like that one, and I'd kissed a couple of boys before Edward, a few between periods where Edward and I were okay together, and a lot since. I can't remember a single one of them. But, I can remember that kiss fourteen years ago like it was this morning. The same is true of every kiss he and I shared. His kisses are like tattoos on my soul; the memory of them is permanent and everlasting."

**A/N: I hope you feel that I've done them justice. It wasn't your traditional meadow, I know, again, I took some liberty with it.**

**Now, feed my guilty pleasure and review. I would at least like to thank you for reading.**


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: Thanks again TwirlGrrl!**_

_**Don't own Twilight!**_

_**Chapter 9**_

"_Edward's kiss stopped my entire universe. It was like the world had blown up around me and I failed to notice. He probably could have gotten anything he wanted from me after that one kiss. That's how I've always been with him. I just totally lose control, but Edward didn't. He always set the pace with us, and his pace was always more controlled than mine."_

_Rosalie and Alice were both quiet. I wondered what they were thinking. _

"_I can't remember other kisses like that one, and I'd kissed a couple of boys before Edward, a few between periods where Edward and I were okay together, and a lot since. I can't remember a single one of them. But, I can remember that kiss fourteen years ago like it was this morning. The same is true of every kiss he and I shared. His kisses are like tattoos on my soul; the memory of them is permanent and everlasting."_

I looked at each of them. Alice had an expression of awe and her eyes were watering, but Rosalie looked confused, or maybe, worried.

"What Rose? What are you thinking?"

"I don't understand the part about the secrecy thing. Why didn't he want anyone to know?"

"Oh, yeah, I never fully understood that, and that became a problem for us that summer."

Rose's head snapped back, "Problems that early, kind of sets the tone for the next ten years, doesn't it?"

"See, I'd never had a boyfriend before. I mean, I'd kissed a couple of guys in Phoenix, playing dare and shit, but never a real boyfriend. So, I guess I didn't really know the whole protocol; how to go about it all. So, I let Edward lead. In retrospect, it was so screwed up, but at the time, it was just confusing. I would describe it as the summer of passion, awkwardness, mixed signals and general teenage angst and confusion."

The look of horror on their faces made me laugh. "Well, it started out pretty awesome actually, for me and Edward that is…"

_**FLASHBACK – MEADOW 1992**_

_My hands ran up over his chest to his neck. I reached behind his neck and twisted my hands into his hair. Soon we were both breathing together; tongues twisting around one another. I'd never been kissed like Edward kissed me there in that meadow. We shared the same breath and moved against one another. His arms wrapped around my waist and under my fleece pullover. After several minutes we were gasping, pulling and tugging on one another. _

_Finally Edward must have realized we were steamrolling down a path at breakneck speeds because he slowed the frantic pace of our kisses before placing one last soft kiss on my lips and then leaning his forehead against mine. _

"_Bella?" He breathed my name._

"_Edward?"_

"_I brought some lunch and a blanket. Would you like to sit and relax for a bit?"_

_I nodded. "Yeah, let's stay here for a while."_

Edward wrapped his arms around me and I leaned my head against his chest. I could feel his racing heartbeat under my cheek. His chest was rising and falling like my own rushed breathing. I smiled in the knowledge that our kiss had the same impact on him as it did me. I clung to Edward as my reactions calmed again. He finally slid his hands up my arms to my shoulders and gently pulled me back from him so that we could see each other.

He whispered down to me. "Let's get some lunch; we could use a distraction."

Edward went to his backpack and pulled out a blanket and several unrecognizable containers. I cocked my head as he pulled them out and he caught my curiosity. "Bear-proof."

"Oh!" I started scoping out the area. I gulped once, "Are there many bears up here?"

Edward snickered at me and gave me his crooked grin. "Of course, but don't worry, they're more scared of you than you are of them."

"Wanna bet?"

He laughed, as he sat down on the blanket. "Well then what are you doing way over there? Come over here where I can protect you." He had a little grin and a twinkle in his eye. I think I might have jumped the ten feet between us in a single leap.

Edward sheepishly unpacked our lunch. "I can't cook, so I hope you don't have high expectations. I brought sandwiches, strawberries, chips, and Oreo cookies. I didn't know what you liked so I made a turkey and cheese, and a PB & J. Which would you like?"

"I don't care, they're both fine with me."

He rolled his eyes at me. "Would you pick please."

I shot an exaggerated eye roll back at him. "What flavor jelly?"

"Grape, of course."

_Ick. _I turned to the turkey sandwich."Mayo or miracle whip?"

"Miracle Whip."

_Ick Ick._ "I'll take the PB & J."

Edward looked at me for a minute and then cracked up laughing. "Are you trying to tell me, that I fucked up sandwiches?"

I laughed back. "I'm sorry, Miracle Whip is just nasty.

He shook his head. "Grape jelly?"

I couldn't stop the giggles. "I'm a strawberry preserves girl myself. But, really, this is wonderful. I don't mean to be a poor sport." I didn't have the heart to ask him if he'd bothered to wash the strawberries. They were still in the store container so I was pretty sure of the answer.

He laughed. "It's okay, I've eaten a few of your dinners now; I knew I was out of my league. Next time, you get to pack the lunch."

We ate the sandwiches, strawberries, pretzels and cookies that he'd packed for lunch. When we finished eating he packed everything away in the backpack and then used it as a backrest. He had me swing around so that I could use his lap as a pillow. As I leaned back he reached under my neck to flip my hair across his lap. We sat like that for about an hour as he played with my hair while we talked and soaked up the sunshine above the clouds. Sometimes we just laid there, in surprisingly comfortable silence. I was grateful for the quiet because my head was still spinning over that kiss.

I'd only kissed one other guy like that – with tongue, that is. His name was Tony; and it was the result of a mix of spin the bottle and seven minutes in heaven. I wouldn't have described it as…good. It was wet, and slimy; he was very aggressive. I remember that he had braces that gnawed on my face and he shoved his tongue in my mouth so far, I almost choked. I had been anxious to end, and when it did, I never looked back. The whole experience had been awful and nothing like kissing Edward.

Edward's kiss was soft and gentle, at first. And even as the enthusiasm grew he didn't over-exert himself. He met me halfway. My reactions had been so different. I wanted him closer, and his hands on me, everywhere. I was surprised by the intensity of those desires; areas of my body had…responded…in ways I'd never experienced before. Some of those responses were still tingling as I was laying there with my head in his lap while his fingers played in my hair. It was like my body couldn't return to normal while he was still here with me. I wish he would kiss me again, and again, and again.

"What are you thinking about?" Edward's voice interrupted my thoughts with a jolt.

"Huh?" I blinked my eyes at him and then used my hand to shield my eyes against the sun.

"I said, what are you thinking about?"

"Oh! I don't know, just relaxing, why?"

"You have the cutest smile on your face and you just went 'mmmmm'. So I had to know what you were thinking to cause such a sound."

"I did? Oh. I think maybe I dozed off. Sorry." _Oh my God, how embarrassing. Did I really just moan out loud? _

I could feel the blood rushing to my face and scrambled for a way to distract him before he noticed it.

"So, didn't you say something about this trip killing two birds?"

"Oh, yeah! Well obviously, the first was to find you some sunshine. But I also brought baggies so we could collect samples for the bio project."

"Good idea! Should we go see what we can find?"

He nodded and smiled at me before leaning forward to give me a kiss. Just like before that quick kiss turned into a deeper kiss. I reached up and wrapped my hand around his neck, pulling him down to me, and soon we were gasping and panting. But Edward was still sitting and leaning down over me, and it couldn't have been comfortable, so I finally let him go and he pulled away after one last chaste kiss.

He cleared his throat, but still sounded husky. "We should get moving before I end up in traction."

I nodded, not really sure I could walk.

As he folded up the blanket and stowed it away in the pack he laid out a plan for us. "Up here we will mostly find just pines, but I checked and we can use pines too, we just won't find many different kinds. We can get a better variety of leaves on the hike back down, but I'd like to show you more of the views up here before we go. So let's leave the pack here for now, and we can just stay nearby. Then we'll come back for it before we head back down."

"Okay, do you think we'll find most of what we need on our way back?"

"Probably not, and I thought we'd have time to get into the rainforest today, but we've spent a lot more time here than I thought we would."

I frowned. "Are you judging my hiking abilities?"

"Not at all, I'm complimenting your kissing." He grinned at me and then wrapped his arms around me for a little more before we hit the trails.

Every time I turned around I was startled by another more amazing view of the snow capped mountains, or a beautiful valley below us. We found another meadow where a doe and two fawns were nibbling on the wildflowers. While Edward held my hand and led me through the meadows and small wooded areas, I noticed how often I'd catch him watching me take in this beautiful new world. After the third or fourth time I caught him I finally called him out on it.

"What?"

Edward seemed startled. "What do you mean what?"

"Why do you keep watching me? Are you afraid I'm going to fall off the cliff side?"

"No, I just enjoy watching your reactions. It always took my breath away too, but I've never met anyone else who seemed to really appreciate the beauty of it like I do. Maybe that's because everyone else has grown up here, and you're the only person I've been up here with who's seeing it for the first time. I don't know; I'm just enjoying watching you light up."

"Really? How could they not appreciate it? It's stunning, transcendent; even a little overwhelming. The air up here feels different."

After an hour we finally went back to collect the backpack; I was relieved that Edward was able to guide us straight back to it. We collected more leaves on the way back down the trail. We were almost to the end of the trail when the inevitable happened; I tripped on a tree-root. Edward caught me, but not before I cut my hand on a sharp stick.

"Damn" I hissed at my hand where the blood was starting to ooze from the gash. I quickly rolled my eyes to the sky and breathed in the air.

"Shit, I'm sorry, I thought I had you. Are you okay? Here let me see it." Edward took my hand carefully and looked it over before slinging the pack off his shoulders. He flipped back the cover and unzipped a side pocket to pull out a pouch. He quickly unrolled it to reveal a little first-aid kit.

He flashed me a grin. "Charlie warned me that I'd better be prepared. I always have it with me anyway, but I made sure it was fully stocked." He was twisting open a little bottle of peroxide.

I rolled my eyes. "You're quite the Boy Scout." Then I hissed and started jumping around when he poured the peroxide over the wound. "Holy fuck! Damn that stings!"

Edward busted up laughing at me as I hopped around waving my hand in the air. "Stop being a baby, you little potty mouth. Come here, let me see it."

He took my hand and held it gingerly while he gently blew on it. I'm not sure if it helped the pain or not because I went suddenly stupid. My mouth fell open as I watched him carefully dab it dry with gauze. I was thinking how badly I'd like to run my fingers through his copper hair as I let him blow on various other parts of my body. He put a bandage over it before kissing the top of the band-aid.

"There, see all better." His eyes flicked to mine too quickly for me to compose myself.

I blinked once, swallowed hard and then nodded, while I felt my face flame red; Edward had totally busted me eyeballing him. The tension between us started crackling once again as we stood there on the side of the trail. I looked back up to meet Edward's eyes and saw the same change in him that I'd felt a moment ago.

He gently pulled my hand down to his side while his other hand reached up to stroke my cheek. I waited for him to bring his lips down to mine, but he didn't. Instead we just stood there while his green eyes held mine. The light in his eyes had changed, they darkened and I was lost in the deepest of green with little flecks of gold. I felt my breath hitch, my pulse accelerate, and the air between us grew thick with tension. He let go of my hand at his side and his hand ran up my arm, over my shoulder, up the side of my neck until it was cupping the other side of my jaw. He held my face in both of his hands as our eyes never closed, while he slowly leaned down to brush his lips across mine, ever so softly.

The moment his lips touched mine, my eyes fluttered closed and I exhaled the breath I'd been holding in a low sigh. His lips brushed mine again, and then the third time his tongue snuck out and parted my lips. I opened for him again, granting him access. His tongue licked my own, and he tasted like a mixture of salty and sweet. When he withdrew, I pushed forward; our tongues dancing again in a rhythmic waltz.

I never realized he'd been guiding me backwards until I felt my back pressed up against the steep hillside behind me; it was a near vertical incline running up the side of the mountain, but it was covered in grass. He was moaning, and I was gasping, and we were both grabbing and pulling. He bent his knees to reach down and grab my sides, lifting me up so that my face was even with his. With the earth behind me, I wrapped my legs around his waist and let him lean into me. His hands were running the length of me from my calf, up my leg, over my hip, stopping at my ribs. I kept arching my back, urging his hands higher, but instead they wrapped around to my back before returning back down over my hip. My hands were tangled in his hair as I kept pulling his face closer to my own.

When we were both gasping for air, his mouth left mine and he kissed and licked down my jaw to my neck. Finally, he paused, resting his forehead on my shoulder as we both leaned against the mountainside panting and gasping against one another.

"Bella?"

"Yeah?" I breathed as I let my head fall back against the grass.

"I think we should get back on the trail before a park ranger stumbles across us."

"Mmhmm, probably." He raised his head to look at me again. His eyes were dark and hooded.

"Bella, you are a fucking amazing kisser."

"Yeah, you too. That's, um…one area where we seem to be in sync." I swallowed and leaned my forehead into his chest as he lowered me back to the ground.

"You'll tell me if I'm pushing you too fast won't you?"

"Uh huh." I was wondering if I would know when that point was, because so far, he hadn't come anywhere near it. I was wondering how entirely inappropriate it would be to lose my virginity in the middle of the Olympic National Park. Then again, I'm only sixteen, and this is our first date.

We collected ourselves and got back on the trail. For the remainder of the walk, we were touching in some fashion. Sometimes he had an arm over my shoulder, or one hand in the small of my back, when the path narrowed he let me go ahead of him, but always reached forward to hold my hand.

We stopped at an Italian restaurant in Port Angeles. We had a private booth in a corner and ate and talked at a leisurely pace. Edward glanced at his watch and his eyes lit up in surprise.

"Holy Shit! We've gotta go if I'm going to get you back on time."

"What time is it?"

"A little after eight-thirty." He was flagging the waitress for the check.

"Edward, I don't have to be home until eleven."

He pursed his lips at me. "You heard Charlie, he bet that I'd have you home by ten, and that's what I'm going to do."

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously?"

"Bella, look, I plan on taking you out plenty more times, wouldn't it be smart to start out on the right foot now?"

He had me there. "Fine." I sighed

We left the restaurant and drove towards Forks in a content quiet. I realized that I was completely exhausted. I nearly dozed off, until Edward pulled to a stop in front of Charlie's house. Suddenly all of my senses were awake and alert anticipating our kiss goodnight. He didn't disappoint. Charlie did.

We had just found a nice rhythm when Edward pulled away and arched his eyebrows, tilting his head in the direction of my front porch. Charlie's outline could be seen inside the front door. He was standing at the door watching us and flipping the porch lights off and on; off and on. "I think Charlie wants you inside now."

"Oh, how embarrassing."

"Relax. He worries about you."

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever."

"So, what's in your plans for tomorrow? Maybe we could go the rainforest and find the rest of the leaves."

"Umm, I'm supposed to have breakfast with Mags, how much time will we need? I'll ask Charlie if we can go later."

Edward shook his head and frowned. "Better stay local. We'll go to the rainforest some other time, but we do need to find the rest of the leaves. We can do that right here." He nodded toward the woods surrounding Charlie's house. Call me when you get back from breakfast."

"Okay. See you tomorrow."

We kissed one last time before I collected the little bouquet of wildflowers that I'd picked and ran in the house.

Charlie and I chatted for a bit about Hurricane Ridge. I told him how amazing the mountains and meadows were. I put my flowers in a vase and headed up to bed where I enjoyed the memories of the day and drifted off to sleep.

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I groaned as my body was rocked and bounced by what must have been an earthquake. Are there fault lines in Washington? I think I'd heard that there were, but I'd never experienced one.

"Come ON Bella. Wake up." Maggie was bouncing on the end of my bed.

I groaned. "What time is it?"

"Almost nine o'clock. I couldn't wait anymore. We need to talk."

"Why?" I rolled onto my back and stretched. Then I gasped as the memories of yesterday flooded back to me. I couldn't suppress the smile.

Maggie caught it too. "Ooohhh I know that face. You had a good day, didn't you?"

I just smiled and rolled my eyes. "How was the dance?"

"Come on and get dressed. We need food." Maggie's face was virtually unreadable, with the exception of a subtle blush in her cheeks. I squinted at her for a minute before I caught the slightest twitch in the corner of her mouth.

I sat bolt upright in bed. "Oh my God! You kissed Emmett!"

Maggie groaned and shook her head before flopping backwards with her arm over her eyes. "Get dressed Bella. I'm not telling you anything until we have food in front of us."

Forty five minutes later we were sitting in the Forks diner, with an array of breakfast foods scattered in front of us.

"Okay Maggie, spill it. What happened?"

She shook her head at me. "You first."

I knew she would be relentless until I agreed. So I decided to give her the abridged version. "We hiked through the mountains of ONP. It was beautiful and romantic and perfect. He packed a lunch. Yes, we kissed. It was amazing. Your turn." I was growing red by the end.

Maggie's eyebrows shot up under her bangs. "You hiked? Have you ever been hiking before?"

I grinned. "Nope," popping the p sound. "He bought me new boots." I kicked my leg out to show her my boots that I'd decided to wear again that morning.

Maggie snorted and tilted her head as she appraised my boots. "Points for originality."

I looked at my plate. "Yeah, he racked up points all day long." I blushed a furious red and chanced a peek at Maggie.

She burst into a loud guffaw of laughter. "Okay, I don't think I want anymore details than that."

"You really don't." I grinned. "Okay, your turn; tell me about the dance."

Maggie took a deep breath and then buried her face in her hands. I could barely make out her words as she mumbled them into her palms. "Most. Uncomfortable. Night. Of. My. Life."

I gaped at her. "Oh no! What happened?"

She dropped her hands, but kept her eyes closed, shaking her head slightly as she was clearly going through it in her mind.

"I don't know, but from the second he came to pick me up it was just so awkward. Like the dress and his suit just made us both forget who we were. He did all the polite things a guy is supposed to do, but it was just so …not…Emmett. And, oh my God, Bella, everyone was watching us and it was just so uncomfortable. The longer the night went on the more he was sweating, and I couldn't think of a single thing to say. It was so so bad." She groaned and looked at me.

"Oh Maggie, I'm so sorry. Maybe it wasn't really that bad."

"Oh sure, there was one moment when we both cracked under all the tension. Like when Jessica and Lauren arrived with their dates. Guess who Lauren came with?"

"Not Tyler?" It was the natural assumption since Mike was taking Jessica, he's Mike's buddy, and Tyler and Lauren were frequently spotted together at parties.

Maggie grinned at me and shook her head. "Nope. Tyler already had a date. Lauren came with Eric Yorkie." She paused to let it sink in.

I covered my mouth as I started laughing. There could not have been a more unlikely pair. Eric was a really nice guy, and really smart. Lauren, well, she's not smart and not nice. "Oh, poor Eric."

"Right? He did the best he could, I think. Mike obviously set the whole thing up. I don't think either one of them were very happy with the whole idea. Lauren was a total bitch, but he took it in stride I think. I wanted to rip her hair out. Lauren ignored him, so he hung out with me and Emmett. It was the only time we were remotely comfortable."

"Oh and you should have seen Jessica! I think her dress was two sizes too small. We kept waiting for something to pop out. Mike was about to blow a nut. Then they disappeared and Lauren was left with us. What a BITCH!"

Poor Maggie was really steamed. "She kept hitting on Emmett right in front of me. So he finally asked me if I wanted to dance. That was uncomfortable." She cringed again as she thought about it.

"Did it ever get any better?"

Maggie sighed. "Not really. He gave me a kiss on the cheek goodnight." The way she said it, told me she was pretty disappointed.

"That's what I don't get. I've been waiting to kiss Emmett for like three years, but when he dropped me at home, I was suddenly terrified that he actually _would_ kiss me." She visibly shuddered.

It was pretty clear that the lack of chemistry really bothered her. "How did you leave it?"

Maggie furrowed her brow. "I don't know. He said he'd call me today, which surprised me, because I just assumed we'd let it drop until school tomorrow. It almost seems like maybe he didn't think it was _as_ awkward as I did?" She said it like a question, squinting her eyes and looking out the window.

"Well, maybe you should just wait and see. You know, play it out. Maybe it was just nerves. Edward and I are supposed to go hunt for more leaves today, maybe you guys should come with us, like a group thing."

Maggie thought about it for a while. "You sure you don't mind? I don't want to intrude."

I did want to spend more time with Edward, but Maggie seemed so confused, I didn't have the heart. "Of course, I'll just call him and he can check with Emmett."

We paid the bill and went back to my house to call Edward and Emmett. Charlie was still out fishing, so I left him a note and ninety minutes later the four of us were walking the woods behind Charlie's. I couldn't help but notice that Edward didn't hold my hand that afternoon. He hadn't greeted me with a kiss when he arrived either. I wondered if he'd talked to Emmett about their awkward date and hoped that he was trying to make everyone comfortable. When we'd finished collecting the leaves that we needed we walked back to Charlie's.

Charlie had apparently stopped at the house while we were out. He'd appended the note I'd originally left him while he was fishing. He'd gone to Billy's for dinner, and left a twenty on the counter so that I could order a pizza. Edward called home to check with Dr. Cullen, and said they were given a special exception from Sunday dinner, probably due to a cold the Esme was suffering from. So the four of us ordered up pizza and bread sticks, and Maggie and Emmett went to pick it up. The second they were out the door, Edward turned to me.

"Thank God." He had me in his arms, and was kissing the hell out of me. After a couple of minutes he pulled back, and smiled at me. "I've been waiting for that all day."

"Well, then why didn't you?"

He shrugged. "I don't know, I'm not really a big fan of PDA, and I didn't know what you'd told Maggie."

I nodded. "You don't need to worry about me and Maggie. We don't share details, but she understands. So, what did Emmett tell you about the dance last night?"

"We didn't really talk about it much. He was still sleeping when you called. He just said they had a good time."

"Oh, did he tell you who Lauren went with?"

"Uh, uh."

"Eric Yorkie."

Edward got a strange look on his face, his brow furrowed. "Lauren and Eric Yorkie?"

"I know, I couldn't see it either. So is that all that Emmett told you; that they had a good time?"

"Uh huh, why should there be more?"

I shook my head quickly. "No, I was just curious. They'd be cute together, don't you think?"

He smirked at me. "Bella, I don't think about Emmett and anything in terms of being 'cute'. We also don't gossip and braid each other's hair, in case you were curious."

I slugged him lightly in the belly, but he saw it coming and I almost hurt my hand on his rock hard abs.

He grinned and shrugged. "Whatever; I'm staying out of it. That's why I like to avoid the microscope. People like to meddle." He smiled down at me. "Now come here, they'll be back soon."

He pulled me back for another kiss, effectively ending my ability to pry any further into the teenage psyche. Too soon we heard the doors closing out front and Maggie and Emmett were back.

We enjoyed our pizza, and Edward and I almost identified all of our leaves, only disagreeing about three of them. We decided to table it until we could reference a book in Bio the next day. Pretty soon it was time to wind it down for the evening. They helped clean up and then Edward and Emmett gave Maggie a ride home.

When I the alarm clock went off the next morning I nearly bounced out of bed. I was so excited to see Edward after our weekend together. When I arrived at school he was waiting in his car for me and climbed out to walk me inside. It was friendly, but contact-free. We sat together at lunch with the normal group, either next to or across from each other each day. Everything seemed to have gone unchanged and we were continuing 'our little secret'. I hated to admit that I was a pretty disappointed.

Finally, it was the last week of classes, finals week. Edward and I had already finished our projects and I was excused from all but one of my finals; government. I breezed through it and was on my way back from dropping off some papers to the office for my teacher when a hand grabbed me around the waist and pulled me into an empty classroom. Before I even knew what was happening, Edward had his mouth on mine. The momentary panic melted away as his passion washed over me. After several seconds or minutes of frantic kissing he finally released my mouth and leaned his forehead against mine.

"Edward! You scared the hell out of me!" I panted, still catching my breath.

He flashed me a crooked grin. "Sorry about that. I was in the library thinking about how it's been two days since I've kissed you and then all of a sudden you walked by. I saw you, an empty hallway, and just had to get a bathroom pass."

"I don't mind the kissing, but did you have to grab me like that! Again, you scared the hell out of me!"

"I know. So much more fun that way!" He winked, gave me another quick kiss and ran back out the door, leaving me stunned and flushed, and kind of horny in an empty classroom.

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Two days later school was released for the year and I was thrilled to start my summer with Edward. I had a part-time job near the beach at the General Store, serving ice cream five days a week. Edward developed a love for strawberry soft-serve and stopped to see me each day on his way home from soccer. He'd joined a league for the summer, since the school soccer season conflicted with baseball.

Most of my off-work days were spent hanging out with Edward, Maggie, and Emmett. As promised, we visited the Hoh rain forest, Kalaloch beach, and the meadow in the mountains several times that summer. I was blissed out with my relationship with Edward; Maggie and Emmett settled into their own awkward quazi-relationship that included holding hands occasionally, but never did kiss. Edward apparently decided that we could show limited affection in front of them once he noticed them holding hands, but it was always within limits and we never once kissed in front of anyone.

A few weeks into the summer Edward and I stopped at the General Store for ice cream on a night that I wasn't working. We were sitting on a park bench outside sharing our cones; I got chocolate and he got strawberry, but we usually just shared them. We were facing each other on the same bench and his hand was resting on my thigh, a thing I was acutely aware of, since I was wearing shorts, and it felt like my skin was on fire under his touch. We were leaning into each other and talking quietly when we heard someone yell from the front of the store.

"Hey Masen!" Edward's head snapped up and I abruptly felt his hand leave my thigh. He grinned in the direction of the front of the store and stood to greet Tyler Crowley.

"Hey Tyler, how's it going?" They did their manly fist shake and shoulder bump.

"Not bad, not bad. Just grabbing some milk for my mom. Hey, I wanted to tell you that was a sweet shot the other day against Quinault."

"Yeah, thanks man. Their goalie's the bomb. I just got lucky."

"Whatever, your lucky shot; our win. I'll take it." His gaze shifted to me. "Hey Bella how ya doing?"

"I'm good thanks. So you play soccer with Edward?"

"Uh huh. Me, Mike, Baker, Reed, Armstrong and Gerig." His eyes flicked back and forth from me to Edward. His questions were so obvious, but Edward never answered him.

_Why didn't he ever tell me all those guys were on the league? And why does Tyler seem so surprised to see me here with Edward? And why is Edward suddenly keeping his distance?_

Tyler waited about thirty seconds past the point when things first became uncomfortable before finally clearing his throat. "Okay, well we better get back. I'll see you tomorrow morning Masen. Later Bella."

I nodded. "See ya Tyler."

Edward watched Tyler drive away before turning back to face me. I shot him a look that said, '_explain quickly or you're toast.'_

"Bella, I'm so sorry. Please sit down and I'll explain."

"Not sitting." I walked to the closest trash can and tossed the rest of my ice cream.

"Don't you want that?"

"Lost my appetite. Start talking Edward."

"Look, these guys on the league are really on testosterone overload. It's a recreational league, we don't have a serious coach, and they can be really…crude. I didn't tell you about all the guys that you knew because I thought you'd want to come watch a game."

"And that would be bad?" I crossed my arms; clearly in a defensive position.

"No, not that I don't want you there. Just that I don't want them to really know much about _us_. Okay, how do I put this?" He tipped his head back to face the sky with his eyes closed while he chose his words. He finally emitted a small growl and faced me again. "Look, they're just a bunch of stupid fuckers. They treat girls like trash and talk about them like objects. To me, it's just guys being guys, but when you think about it in terms of someone you actually know and care about, it's really offensive."

I raised my eyebrows, shook my head, still standing there with my arms crossed. "Sorry, still not following you."

"Bella once they know about us, it would just turn into this really foul innuendo garbage that I really, _really,_ don't think I can listen to when it comes to you. That's why I didn't tell him just now that we were together; I don't want Tyler to go show up for soccer tomorrow and start asking a bunch of questions. If he drove away thinking this was some kind of first date, awkward moment, well then he'll hopefully leave it alone, or at least I can cut him off before it gets all blown out of proportion. But if he knew we were actually together, he'll tell the guys and then I'll start catching all that crap about what we've done together, and then I'll just have to beat their asses for talking about you that way."

I chewed on the inside of my cheek while I thought over his words. He seemed genuine. I've heard some of the guys go on about other girls and they can be really foul, but not Tyler. Tyler was a nice guy. "Edward, it just felt like you were hiding something. I don't think Tyler would talk about me like that."

"I'm not hiding; I'll take you to practice tomorrow if you want. We've got a game on Wednesday again. Come. You can see for yourself if you want. And, you're right; Tyler wouldn't be the one talking smack really. He'll just tell the rest of them that we are together. It's guys like Mike Newton, Reed and Gerig that have the big mouths."

Unfortunately, I was always working when they had practice and games. I decided I needed to just take his word for it. "Fine, okay, let's just drop it. But give me some of your ice cream, because now I wish I hadn't tossed me."

But the seed was planted.

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**Thanks again for reading! Please review…I've heard some really great thoughts from people and they make me smile!**


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N: Thanks again for the reviews. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to get back to everyone. With the fourth of July vacation in there we were frantically posting and then working out the next chapters.**_

_**TwirlGrrl, my absolutely awesome beta pushed it out for me once again!**_

_**Now a quick note: Several people have mentioned that they are getting a little impatient to get to the here and now – the present time story. Please understand, that while each chapter will flash back to the present time, this story is based on the ten year history they had in the past. I am, in fact already planning a sequel that will address the present tense of the relationship, but it will be a while yet. After all, how can we understand the weight of her decision if we don't know the history? **_

_**However, based on your feedback, I'm taking it under consideration to add a little extra present-time character interaction, so look for it soon. And thank you for the feedback, it is greatly appreciated!**_

_**PRESENT TIME**_

I took a break to use the bathroom. It was mid-afternoon by now.

"Hey Alice, Rose, we should make some lunch. What sounds good to you guys?"

Alice's voice came from the kitchen. "I've got it covered. I just got a text from Jasper. He's bringing some Chinese takeout in a while. Emmett's coming with; I think he wants to check on you."

"But no Edward, right?"

"Um, no. He wanted to, but I told him no. I think they've been doing much the same thing over there. Sounds like Edward's rehashing everything for Jasper."

"Huh. Sure would be interesting to compare notes on our versions of the story."

Alice came out of the bedroom and looked at me sadly. "It would, wouldn't it? I think you should, but not with me and Jasper. You should talk to Edward."

Rose interrupted. "Not before she's done telling me. It'll help her to go through it all once first, refresh her memory."

Rose couldn't possibly know how painfully fresh every memory of Edward was for me.

We all plopped back into our spots in the living room. Rose looked at me expectantly. "Okay, summer '92, Edward just pulled a dodge when you ran into Tyler at the General Store, but like an idiot, you did nothing. What's next?"

I arched my eyebrows. "Thanks for being so subtle."

"Sorry, but you were being an idiot. I wouldn't have put up with that shit."

I looked at her pointedly. "Really Rose. You wouldn't have let yourself get treated badly even when you were a stupid, silly, naïve teenager?"

She shot a nasty look and nodded curtly. "Point taken."

Rose was sixteen when she first met Royce King. It didn't get much worse than how Royce treated her.

_**FLASHBACK TO SUMMER 1992**_

We spent the Fourth of July curled up on Kalaloch beach together on a blanket watching fireworks. There were bonfires and parties we could have attended, but Edward said he'd prefer to keep me all to himself.

A couple of weeks later we took Emmett and Maggie up to Hurricane Ridge so that Maggie could take pictures. She'd taken up an interest in photography that summer, and kept going on about the amazing photos. We'd been planning a trip to the Sol Duc Falls and hot springs, so we invited them along. We spent the day splashing in the river, angering fishermen, and wading in the hot springs. Edward and I hid behind trees to make out while Maggie distracted Emmett for an extra long time.

We'd just gotten hungry and decided to stop at a local sandwich shop for a late lunch. Edward came around to open the door for me and we walked to the front entrance holding hands. Emmett was still glowering at Edward for tripping him and making him fall in the river, nowhere near the hot springs. He tried to get back at him, but he was really fast, too fast for Emmett.

Emmett was throwing fake punches at Edward, but Edward tugged my arm to swing me around in front of him, using me as a human shield. I yelped about how uncool it was to use a tiny, petite little thing like me as a shield. In all honestly, I was enjoying the feeling of Edward holding me against him that way.

Emmett was still carrying on about how cold the water was. "Dude, that shit is cold, like _really_ cold! My nipples could still cut glass! "

"We could tell, by how fast you came flying out of that water! Probably have some serious shrinkage huh?"

"Shrinkage nothing; it's like I'm prepubescent again. I don't know if my balls are ever going to drop again. Good thing you're quick man or you'd be singing soprano too."

Maggie and I exchanged a look at the thought of Emmett's balls dropping. Sometimes he had no filter at all.

Edward was laughing. "Dude, there's ladies here. And no one wants to think about your balls. And yeah, you'd better start running. We leave for football camp next Saturday and coach is gonna kick your ass when he sees how slow you've gotten."

"Dude don't remind me. Do you realize that means we only have four more weeks of summer left?"

_What? Had the summer really gone by that fast?_ "Seriously?"

Emmett and Edward both looked at me and nodded. Edward explained, "Camp is always three weeks before the start of the year; then we come back and have two weeks of practice. The first game is actually three days before school starts."

Emmett held the door open for us, and Edward allowed me to lead the way inside, still holding hands. We placed our orders and were waiting for the food when we heard a familiar high pitched voice.

"Bella! Maggie! Edward! Emmett! Hey you guys!" Jessica was squealing her hello to us from a table in the corner where we'd failed to notice her and Lauren. "Come pull up a table and sit with us!"

There was really no way to avoid it at this point, so we acquiesced. Edward and Emmett helped to pull a table up and then went to get our sandwiches while we sat with Jessica and Lauren. There were exaggerated hugs shared all around, like we hadn't seen them in years rather than weeks. I was distracted once again, by the fact that Edward had casually dropped my hand the second he saw Jessica and Lauren.

It was impossible to miss the silent communication passing between Jessica and Lauren. They were _not_ happy to see us come in with their two favorite guys.

Jessica leaned in close trying to get the scoop. "So, what are you guys doing?"

I decided not to play along, and went casual. I shrugged, "Not much, we hiked down to the hot springs. I'd never been there before and Maggie wanted to take pictures."

"With the Cullens?"

"Uh huh. Edward's really good with a compass; I'd get lost in the woods."

Maggie decided to add to the casual banter. "Or break a leg; you should never hike alone."

I shot her a look. "Thanks for that, but I'm not _that _clumsy."

She laughed. "Yes you are."

Emmett and Edward were walking over to join us. Emmett asked. "Are what?"

Maggie looked at him. "Would you say Bella's clumsy?"

Both guys answered at the same time with a resounding "Yes."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine, a little, but I'm sure I could manage hiking to the river by myself without breaking my leg."

Emmett looked at me and coughed. "Bella, I witnessed at _least_ twice today that Edward stopped you from falling _in_ the river."

Edward looked at me with a crooked grin. "Maybe you _could_ make it to the river in one peace, but I doubt you could make it back too. You require supervision."

Lauren was looking at me and Edward closely. "So Edward, is that what you do? Play tour guide and …supervise?"

_The door is open._

He never looked up from his sandwich and just shrugged one shoulder. "Somebody has to."

_The door is closed. The Bella is pissed._

I shot him daggers before I turned to Jessica and Lauren anxious to change the subject. I would not have this argument in front of everyone. "So what have you guys been up to?"

Lauren tossed her hair. "My parents bought some property on the Sol Duc River. We're working on plans to build right now, but are going to start building in a month or two. Hey! We're having a bonfire on the property on Saturday, you guys should come."

Lauren wrote out directions and gave them to Edward. Emmett asked if they ever see Mike or Tyler and Lauren shot a smirk at Jessica. "Jess sees Mike occasionally, don't you Jess?"

She squinted at Lauren. "Not as often as you see Tyler."

Lauren was unfazed by her comment. "Whatever, we were actually just heading out so we'll see you guys on Friday night – around six or seven, okay? Oh, and BYOB."

Maggie turned to us. "Okay, two questions. Are Lauren and Tyler dating? And what does BYOB mean?"

Emmett coughed again. "BYOB means bring your own beer. And Lauren and Tyler dating? I don't know if I'd call it _dating_ exactly, but they 'get together' on a regular basis." He used air quotes on get together.

Maggie and I exchanged a wide-eyed look. "Oh! So they are…?" She didn't finish her question, just waved her hand in the air.

Emmett used the same hand wave to answer. "Yes, they are…for about six months now. That's why she was so pissed that he had another date for the dance."

"But she was trying to get you to ask her."

Emmett nodded slowly and turned a shade of pink. "Yes, and she's been trying to 'get together' with both of us too." He waved a hand between him and Edward.

I looked at Edward. He shook his head at me, understanding my unspoken question. "Never happened."

Maggie looked at Emmett, the unfortunate shade of pink he'd turned when explaining that Lauren had been trying to get with them also had cast him in a rather guilty looking hue. But he was too busy eating his sandwich and didn't notice. She cleared her throat, but he still didn't notice. Maggie looked at me and then back at Emmett, she was starting to panic. Edward finally kicked him under the table.

"Ow, fuck dude! What was that for?" Edward shot a pointed look back and forth between Maggie and him. Emmett was still clueless. He looked at each of us, staring at him. "What? Why are you all looking at me like that?"

I finally cleared my throat and spoke slowly using the same finger quotes. "Emmett, did you and Lauren ever 'get together'?"

He coughed a bunch of times. "Oh! Fuck no! No! God No! Give me some credit, I might be slow sometimes, but I'm not stupid!"

Edward, Maggie, and I all shook our heads. They laughed, but I was still thinking about Edward's answer to Lauren's question about playing tour guide with me. He actually shrugged and said 'somebody has to.' _What the fuck is that all about._ I was starting to feel like the joke was on me.

I made an excuse that I needed to get home early that night to spend some time with Charlie. Edward kept looking at me; I knew he could pick up on my change in mood. When he dropped me off that night I just said a quick goodbye to everyone and hopped out of the car.

I was halfway up the walk when Edward caught up to me. "Bella wait."

I turned back to him. "What Edward?"

"What's wrong? Did I do something?"

"Nope, nothing at all. I just need to go, Charlie's going to be home soon and I need to take care of some things."

"So you're not mad at me about anything?"

"Of course not; why would I be mad at my favorite tour guide and babysitter?" My tone was icy.

"Oh, so that's what this is about; the fact that I didn't define everything for those two skanks. Bella, do you like spending time with me?"

"Yes, of course"

"Do you like kissing me?"'

I nodded.

"When it comes to me and you, do I treat you okay? Am I rude? Abrasive? Insulting?"

"No, you treat me great. It's just that…"

"You would really prefer that I talk about you to all of our friends like Mike does Jessica? Do you really need me to broadcast everything about us?"

"No, I don't want you to talk about me _like that_. I don't know. Maybe I'm over reacting."

Edward walked up to me and took my face in his hands. He looked me right in the eyes. "Bella I _want_ to be with you. I'm just a private person. I don't like having everyone in my business. It's not that I'm ashamed of you, or us, it's important to me. For now, I would really prefer to keep it private."

I smiled. Somehow, the feel of him this close to me, just took the wind right out of my sails. "Okay, I know, I'm sorry I overreacted."

"Don't be sorry; just tell me if something's bothering you."

"Okay."

"Okay." He kissed me chastely but sweetly then leaned his forehead on mine. "I'll call you tomorrow okay?"

"Sure."

"Sweet dreams."

I jogged the rest of the way up the front walk like I was floating. I danced my way through my chores and had a pleasant evening with Charlie.

But when I went to bed that night, the fears came back to me like a sore that wouldn't heal.

The seed had been planted, now it was watered. My fears were growing.

Saturday night Emmett and Edward picked up me and Maggie from Maggie's house where we'd been getting ready together. Maggie's parents were a bit more lenient on curfew; and it was her father's high school reunion. The party was an hour away at a hotel in Port Angeles, and he still had a lot of friends that he kept in touch with. So we knew they were going to be home really late at the least, and there was a chance that they might stay over in Port Angeles if they had too much to drink. Maggie was guessing that they would probably call around twelve thirty to make sure she was home by curfew and then tell her they were staying over. So we decided to spend the night at her house.

Maggie clung to the blanket she'd thought of to bring when Edward's Volvo pulled in the driveway. As we ran out to green them, we could hear them arguing.

"Fine, but if you get caught, I'm not going down with you. I know nothing. And if you puke in my car, you clean it, with a toothbrush."

"Okay. Don't you trust me?"

Edward grumbled "Not even a little bit."

Maggie and I shared a curious glance and then she leaned forward between the front seats. "Okay, you guys, what's going on?"

Edward looked at me in the review mirror before glancing at Maggie over his shoulder. "This moron thought it would be a good idea to pinch a case of beer from Carlisle and Esme's leftovers from the Fourth of July party."

I rolled my eyes at Edward in the mirror; he looked exceptionally pissed. Emmett couldn't stay out of trouble if it killed him. But I'd seen tipsy Emmett a few months back at a party before school let out. He's funny as shit; I was secretly looking forward to the entertainment.

Maggie surprised me though. "Emmett, you mind if I have a couple of them?"

I hissed at her. "Maggie? Are you kidding me?"

She turned back to me with a mischievous twinkle in her eye. "Why not? My mom and Dad won't be home until really late, if they even come home at all. It's the perfect opportunity."

Edward and I exchanged a look in the mirror as Emmett turned to me. "Bella, have you ever drank before?"

"Just a couple of glasses of champagne at a wedding last summer. My mom allowed one, but Phil slipped me a second one. I never finished the second one because I got too dizzy."

Emmett grinned at me. "Champagne's a lot stronger than beer, but if two glasses of champagne made you dizzy, you should be good with three or four beers. You in?"

I glanced back at Edward in the mirror while I chewed on my cheek. "I don't know." I held out two palms, facing up. "Police Chief's daughter… Underage drinking …." I bobbed the two hands up and down in the age-old sign of balancing weights. "Probably not a good idea to be seen walking around with a can of beer."

Emmett grinned at me and held up a small stack of red plastic cups. "Problem solved."

I looked at Edward again; he let out a long sigh. "Bella, it's up to you. I'll stay sober and make sure you and Maggie don't get into trouble and get you home on time. Emmett, you're on your own. If you're not in this car when I pull out; I'll leave your ass."

_Hah! If this is what it takes to get you to pay attention to me in public, I'm in._

Emmett and Maggie both looked at me with glee. I rolled my eyes, playing it cool. "Fine, corrupt the innocent Police Chief's daughter."

When we pulled up to the property I was surprised to see the entry to the vacant lot and the sides of the street lined with cars. Fortunately, there weren't many people living out there and the houses were pretty spread out. The chances were pretty small that a neighbor would complain. It was a heavily wooded lot with only a narrow break in the trees for a rough entrance drive to the undeveloped property. As long as we stayed on the path it was easy enough to traverse the woods. From the woods you couldn't even make out the clearing several hundred feet up the drive where a large bonfire was blazing.

Everyone, and I do mean _everyone_, from Forks High class of '92, '93 and '94 was there. I'd forgotten that Lauren had an older brother that graduated this year. Apparently word of the get-together had spread like wild-fire to every underage person in town. It was still light out so we were immediately spotted and greeted by most of our friends from school. Emmett selected a tree stump as our 'base camp' and claimed it as his seat, setting our beer between his feet. The fortunate thing about Emmett is that everyone loved him, so he could sit and let the party come to him. He poured two cans of beer into two cups on the ground and handed one to each me and Maggie. "When you need more, I'll be here."

I made a deliberate decision to stick with Maggie instead of following Edward around. I was tired of feeling like the needy and clingy one in the relationship. Edward was still standing next to Emmett, scanning the crowd and offering a few hello nods to people when I let Maggie drag me over to a small group from our class including Eric Yorkie, Mike Newton, Jessica, Molly, and Kelly. Molly and Kelly were two girls that Maggie and I were friendly with in a couple of classes; they were usually more timid than the rest of us, but tonight they were both wearing shorter shorts than I would have expected and were passing a bottle with some kind of liquor back and forth.

I took note that Edward had made his way over to where Tyler, Eric Reed, somebody with the last name of Armstrong, and a few other guys I didn't recognize were playing a small game of soccer. Several of them were upperclassmen but they must be from the same soccer league, because they clearly knew each other fairly well. We stood around and chatted for a while until Molly and Kelly had drifted off to another group; they were clearly inebriated. Apparently that liquor was easier to take than the taste of this awful warm beer. Mike had moved to stand next to me; Jessica on his other side; and I decided to ask him about the soccer league.

"Hey Mike, are those guys over there from the league you and Edward play with?"

He looked their direction and his face lit up like he'd just seen them for the first time. There were some girls including Lauren sitting on blankets alongside where they were playing. "Yeah, they are, come on, let's go over there."

Maggie and I collected Emmett, the beer and the blanket. We laid out the blanket next to a tree, where Emmett set down the case of beer, and then leaned up against it. The rest of the group all sat down around Emmett on the blanket. Maggie was wedged between Emmett and Eric, who was chatting animatedly in her ear. I took a seat next to Molly and Kelly in the hopes of getting to know them better.

Mike went off to join the game and I sat and chatted with everyone until the game broke up. Most of the guys that I didn't know drifted off in another direction, but a couple of them wandered over to our group with Mike, Edward, Tyler, Reed and Armstrong.

Mike made a point of coming to sit next to me and introducing me to the guys on the team, including refreshing my memory of the guys from our class. I said hi and shook hands with many of them and watched as Edward took a seat next to Maggie and Eric. There really wasn't much room left near me, but he showed no outward signs that it mattered to him that Mike had taken the only available space next to me. In fact, from an outside perspective it probably looked like I was with Mike. The fact that Edward made no effort to remedy the misunderstanding bothered me to no end. Maggie caught my eye, obviously noticing the awkward seating arrangements as well, so I offered her a small scowl.

I had just finished my second beer and was starting my third when everyone decided to move closer to the fire. It was getting dark and chilly outside; I was feeling slightly buzzed and severely annoyed. Mike had been sitting next to me for over an hour while I pretended to be unaware of his blatant attempts at flirting. Edward hadn't made a move to talk to me since we'd arrived. As everyone stood to move to the fire Mike hopped to his feet and offered me a hand to help me up; I took it and pretended not to notice his hand lingering longer than necessary on the back of my arm.

I'd been watching Lauren flitting around Edward and Emmett. The longer we were there, the more she drank, and the more preposterous her flirting had grown. I glanced at Tyler at one point and noticed he was watching her antics as well; he saw me and rolled his eyes her direction before shaking his head and walking away. I glanced at Edward who was talking with that guy Armstrong again. Lauren and Jessica were standing near them, both sipping from a cup and whispering between them. Lauren whispered something to Jessica causing her to glance my direction. I didn't know if she was looking at me or Mike, standing next to me, but I stopped worrying about it when she threw her head back in laughter just as Lauren knocked her with her hip, sending her colliding with Edward. Edward caught her with an arm around her waist and made to prop her upright again, but Jessica suddenly became too intoxicated to find her legs and allowed him to hold her upright. She was literally hanging from my Edward.

I snapped my head to Mike. "Hey Mike, isn't she supposed to be _your _problem."

Mike followed my line of sight to where Edward was now dealing with an intoxicated Jessica _and _Lauren fawning all over him. He didn't look nearly annoyed enough to me, but we made eye contact and he knew I was watching. Mike laughed at the twosome and shook his head. "Nope, that's definitely _not_ my problem; besides, Masen seems to have it under control."

I looked at him and frowned. "But I heard you two have been seeing each other?"

He shrugged. "Casually sometimes, but we didn't come here together. For all intents and purposes, I'm available, if that's what you're asking."

"No Mike, that's not what I was asking; I was _suggesting_ you go get your _casual_, _sometimes-slutty_ girl off of him." I didn't realize that I had raised my voice, or if everyone else just stopped talking, but suddenly everyone was looking at me, including Edward, Lauren and Jessica.

And then like a blessing from the Gods, Emmett's booming laughter broke the palpable tension of everyone standing around the fire and everyone looked to him. "Nice Swan, nice."

But I hadn't meant to be funny; I was just done. I looked around the fire in search of Maggie, but couldn't find her. "Emmett, where's Maggie?"

"Huh? Um, I don't know, she was around here. She was talking to Yorkie." Emmett was clearly pretty drunk. I shot one last dirty look in the direction of Edward, Lauren and Jessica and stomped away from the fire. I didn't really know where to go from there, so I started heading towards the car and taking big angry gulps from my beer. I decided I welcomed the alcohol induced haze at this point.

I stumbled my way back to the car; it was much more difficult after three beers and in the dark. Nothing could have prepared me for what I found when I got there. Maggie and Eric Yorkie were leaning against the trunk of the car, heavily making out.

I blurted "Oh Shit." and Maggie and Eric jumped apart.

Maggie gasped. "Bella, um Hi. Sorry. I didn't hear you coming."

I waved a hand at them. "Don't worry about it. I'll just go back to the fire. You two…carry on." I giggled at the end and turned to head back to the fire.

My amusement quickly dissipated though when I found myself stumbling in the darkness and frustrated that everyone seemed to be hooking up but me, who was supposed to actually _have _a boyfriend. Or at least _I_ thought of him as my boyfriend even if we hadn't actually defined things.

My foot slipped down into a groove in the ground and I rolled my ankle, stumbling to my knees. "Ow! Fuck!"

"Bella, is that you?" I heard Edward's voice coming from the direction of the bonfire. "Where are you? Are you okay?" He sounded a little panicked.

I stood up again and kept moving in his direction, trying to keep him from stumbling across Maggie and Eric. I may be pissed, but I'm still a friend.

"I'm right here, I'm fine. You can go back to ignoring me." I grumbled at him.

"I wasn't ignoring you. You seemed to be enjoying yourself; I didn't want to interfere."

"Interfere with what Edward? What exactly would you be interfering with by acknowledging my existence? Other than your chances with Lauren or Jessica, of course."

"Oh come _on_! You know those two annoy the shit out of me. And don't think I didn't notice Mike trying to get with you all night. I trust you; why don't you trust me?"

"I would trust you, if you didn't act like you were dodging a bullet every time we ran into someone we know. Didn't that bother you that Mike was blatantly flirting with me?"

"Yeah, I guess it did, but I trust you."

"Edward, you might trust me, but I'm sorry, it's starting to feel like you are afraid to be seen with me."

"Bella what are you talking about? We've been everywhere!"

"Yes, we've been everywhere. To all the national parks, and the mountains and the beach, but every time we are faced with one of our friends besides Maggie and Emmett you look like you want to duck and run."

"I told you that I don't like PDA, I don't feel like broadcasting everything either. But it doesn't change how I feel about you. I want to be with you. Have I given you any indication that I'm interested in being with anyone else?

"No."

"Then isn't that enough?"

"I don't know. I don't even know what we are to each other. I'm not interested in being 'casual' like Jessica and Mike or Tyler and Lauren."

"Bella I would never treat you that way."

"Well, like it or not, but you have been. You treat me like your little secret. It's the same thing. You are either with me or you're not. If it bothers you so much to have other people know that we are together, then we just won't be. I can't keep doing this."

"Why not? What's so wrong with it? We spend all of our time together, we kiss, we do all of those things. Why do we have to make a public spectacle of ourselves?"

"Edward I'm not asking for a spectacle, but I do need the Jessicas and the Laurens to _know_ that we are together. That shit, that was going on back there, is not okay with me. I'm not going to stand by and watch other girls flirting with you and hanging on you. And it shouldn't be okay with you that Mike thinks he can do it either." By the end of my words tears were streaming down my face.

I swallowed the thickness in my throat. "Look, you decide. It's all or nothing. We are together, as an honest-to-goodness couple or we're not. You can't have it both ways anymore."

Edward stood there speechless in the dark as I turned to make my way back to the party. I stomped up to Emmett and handed him my cup. "Another one."

He looked up at me with a smile on his face but it faded when he saw mine. "You okay?"

"Yup."

"Edward?"

"Yup."

"Wanna talk?"

"Nope."

"Seen Maggie?"

"Um, uh uh?"

"She with Yorkie?"

_Crickets chirping_

"Remind me never to tell you a secret. You suck at lying."

"I know."

I sat next to Emmett and drank my beer. Pretty soon, he had me laughing again and I'd almost managed to forget about Edward, not enough to not notice him sitting on the ground across the fire from me looking pretty glum while he doodled in the dirt with a stick, but almost. Maggie eventually wandered back to the party, separate from Eric. I noticed Tyler Crowley leaning against a tree a ways over, he looked glum too. I followed his line of sight and he was watching Lauren where she was draped over some upperclassmen who was reclining in a lawn chair.

I told Emmett I'd be right back and wandered over to Tyler. "Hey."

"Hey." He smiled at me, but his eyes were still looking pretty down.

"You okay?"

He sighed. "I've had better nights. You?"

"I've had better ones too. Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"You and Lauren? I heard through the grapevine that you were kind of seeing each other." I nodded in the direction of the lawn chair exhibition. "But that makes me think it was pretty casual."

"Huh, casual, that's one way of putting it."

"Tyler, you don't look very _casual_ right now. If that's bothering you, why don't you just tell her."

His head popped up. "You think _I _want to be casual? That's all Lauren; not me."

"Oh!" _Oops, bad assumption; foot in mouth._

"But I'm not doing this anymore; she can't have it both ways."

I barked a cynical laugh and threw an arm over his shoulders. "Ah Tyler, we should talk more often."

He looked at me. "So, you and Masen. Are you two…"

I coughed. "Um no, I don't think it's quite the same. We're not – " Tyler cut me off by waving his hands.

"Don't need details, seriously. I was just wondering if that's why you were looking like someone pooped in your oatmeal earlier."

"Yeah, it's kind of confusing."

"You know, I've seen his car at your house a bunch this summer. Then that day at the General Store it was so awkward. Don't let him pull a Lauren on you, okay?"

"Don't worry, it's not like that, really; it's more like he wants to…keep things private."

"Bella there's a difference between private, and trying to leave the door open."

_Thank you! That's exactly what I should have said._

"Where were you an hour ago? That's exactly what I was trying to say."

Tyler and I hung out for a while and I realized talking to him had given me confidence in my position with Edward. We started kicking the soccer ball around in the dark. Maggie, Eric, Emmett, and several others came to join us. It wasn't long before we were having fun playing a very unofficial game of soccer, considering most of us were drunk and it was dark and there weren't really any defined goals. At one point I was running with the ball and Tyler came to steal it. But instead of fancy footwork he just grabbed me around the waist and threw me over his shoulders, taking control of the ball. He called a goal and then set me back down. We were all laughing and having fun.

Next thing I knew, another set of arms picked me up and started walking off the field with me. An upside-down look at the shoes told me it was Edward. "Hey! Edward put me down. What's wrong with you!"

He walked over by the fire where a bunch more people were still sitting in a circle. He walked right into the center of it and set me on the ground. He grabbed me by the shoulders to hold me in place. "I thought about it. You're right. If it's all or nothing, then it's definitely all. I'm sorry; I should have looked at it from your perspective."

Then he kissed me soundly right there in front of everyone. It wasn't a chaste lip to lip one either. It was with tongue and firm. It was a serious kiss that sent a message to everyone who was watching that we were officially _together._

______________________________________________________________________

_**PRESENT TIME**_

"It took most of the summer, but he finally got there. A week later the guys left for training camp and then the summer was over. When the school year started Edward and I started it together as a couple with boyfriend and girlfriend titles and everything."

Alice looked kind of sad. "What happened with Emmett and Maggie?"

"They almost made it. Well sort of. It almost ended that night, then Emmett did something that knocked her socks off. Then he went off to camp and met some girl, and that was that."

Rosalie's head snapped up. "Where was the camp?"

"Um, I can't remember? Why?"

She shrugged. "Just curious. So, okay, Junior year; you two were together? What happened next?"

"Everything started out fine. He even threw me a birthday party. But then all of a sudden it all went to shit."

**As always, please review. It really means so much to me to know that you are reading and to hear your thoughts. Also, your feelings toward my characters help me paint the picture, so please, please tell me what you think.**

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Finally, Reconstruction has been nominated in a couple of categories for the Indie Twific Awards. Go vote if you like it!


	11. You have not been forgotten

Okay, I'm going to do that really crappy thing that we all hate HARD. I'm posting a chapter update that's not really an update.

I know.

I suck.

But…it's for good cause. First of all, this story has not been abandoned…not entirely anyway. I continue to talk about it and think about all the time, just ask TwirlGrrl, my beta.

Which leads me to the other reason I'm posting this:

New story under a new name: Proxy by Twinnesse.

Twinnesse is a partnership between TwirlGirl and myself, Slutch32.

Long story short, the reason I haven't finished this story is two-fold. First, real life took over for a while, which I won't bore you with details or drama. But also because I can't. Because some of that RL drama inspired Proxy, the new story that I've been working on with TwirlGrrl, my beta from Reconstruction turned partner and very, very good friend.

So please, oh please, go read Proxy by Twinnesse, because we love it, it's fully outlined and beautiful. The first chapter goes up today, and the second tomorrow. THANK YOU IN ADVANCE FOR READING!


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